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And maybe the reason you feel this way is because it's so much easier for you to tear yourself down than it ever will be to hold yourself together. But darling, you can't keep destroying yourself forever.
Days like this
Are days when it hurts just to *******
breathe.
Count to ten.  You can do this.
One, two, three, four
I can't breathe I can't breathe
I can't breathe.
Suffocatingsuffocatingsuffocating
My chest is drowning
Why is my chest drowning?
Shhh, it's okay. Try again.
Ten deep breaths.
Onetwothreefour
Drowningdrowningdrowning
My mind is drowning
I'm clinging to the shore line,
Trying to stay afloat
I can't do this anymore.

Days like this
Are days when it hurts just to *******
speak.
"How are you doing today?"
Come on, you've got this.
Just answer the stupid question.

Shaky breaths.
"I'm- your voice is trembling-okay."
you're not okay
stoplyingstoplyingstoplying.

Days like this
Your mind is attacking you.
Your chest hurts
Your head hurts
Your body hurts
Your heart hurts
Your everything hurts.
But days like this
Are just days.
They will pass.
Suffocating suffocating suffocating.
Bad days will pass; the sadness will go away. Good days will pass; happiness doesn't last forever. Nothing does.
2. Not everything is worth your time or energy or brain space. Sometimes you need to just let things go.
3. You're not alone. You never were. You are surrounded by people that care about you, and if you don't think so, look closer.
4. Mental health and physical health come before grades and school, always. You need to take care of yourself.
5. The most self-destructive thing you can do would be to place all your love and happiness into someone else's hands, without leaving any for yourself. People are fluid. They change, and one day you might find that they left all your love to wither and die out on the street, with no regard for your feelings.
6. The hardest thing to do is to love yourself. But the hardest thing and the right thing are usually the same.
7.  You never actually wanted to die. You just wanted to start living.
8. It's okay to cry. Contrary to popular belief, crying doesn't mean you're weak. It means you're human.
9. Life is way too short for you to spend it surrounded by people that don't care, or people that make you feel ******. Be with people that fill you with positivity and light; people that are willing to stay up until two in the morning with you because your mind is a mess and you don't trust yourself to be left alone. Be with people that love you with every fiber of their being, and that you love even more than that.
10. You need to remember that once upon a time you were a little child, wide-eyed and curious about the world. You didn't lash out at people, you didn't harm yourself on purpose, you didn't starve yourself just so you could be lovely. And some nights, if your entire mind is attacking every single thing that you've ever done, it helps to pretend that you're that little kid again, because how could you possibly hate the three year old version of yourself? You can't. But you're still that three year old version of yourself. And that five year old version, and that nine year old version, and that eleven year old version, somewhere deep down. And if you can't find one single thing to love about your current self, that's okay. Find something to love about any of the other versions. Anything.
11. The coldest, cruelest people were once as warm and welcoming as the sun. So the next time you’re walking around and you decide that the world is an awful place, look closer. See the people around you as they are when they’re with the person they love. See them as they are when their eyes are lit up and they’re talking or thinking about something that they’re really passionate about. Look past the walls that they’ve built around themselves. The world is not an awful place full of broken people. The world is a beautiful place full of fragile precious people that are lost and wandering but still hopeful. If you look around and see misery, look around again and see what’s hidden behind the misery.
12. You're only here on this Earth for a short period of time. You're born, you go through life, then you die. You were blessed with a little bit of the galaxy in your body and stardust in your veins. So make the most out of every single moment that passes by, because you might not wake up tomorrow.
It amazes me how much I've grown and changed as a person since my last birthday, so I decided to make a list of everything I've learned.
I met her going to the fair,
Upon a country road,
A bow was tied about her hair
Which to her shoulders flowed.
The spark of youth shone in her eyes
In pools of emerald green,
Her body was of average size
Yet pretty to be seen.
The whitest dress I ever saw
Swept lightly about her feet,
And around her neck a rabbits claw
Clung in the summer heat.
She smiled thinly, bowed her head
And curtsied with true grace,
And then with timid words she said
"My lord what is this place?"
"The road to Danbury Fair," said I,
"And yonder to the coast,
Please walk with me a by and by
And I shall prove my boast."
A quarter mile, a half-a-mile,
My recollection fails,
We strolled in silent trance like style
All through the sun stroked dales.
Until upon a certain spot
No different than the rest,
The atmosphere that once was hot
Blew with a chilling zest.
Then suddenly the sky grew dim
As sun and light withdrew,
And darkness conquered every limb
Above us that was blue.
The woman gave a startled cry
And fell onto her knees,
"Right here is where I cut the tie
With man's mortalities.
My soul will never rest in peace
But always I shall be
A spirit with an earthly lease
Now and eternally."
A pounding heart betrayed my fear
At this unnatural sight,
But paralysed I could not steer
Myself away in flight.
Instead I watched with heavy breath,
This other worldly power
Tell of her own untimely death
Which cut her youthful flower.
A tale of highway treachery,
So long ago it seems,
Resulted in her pedigree
Dissolved from living themes.
And now with woeful discontent
She grieves her swift demise,
By stirring up the firmament
Over where her body lies.
Though boldness purged my nervous root,
My daring came too late,
The questions posed in minds pursuit
Never formed into debate.
For soon the apparition waned
And vanished from my view,
The clouds dispersed, the sun regained
Its former vibrant hue.
And me, my ordeal done at last,
I stood with nought to say,
A victim of a tragic past
That haunts the Danbury Way.
I can't even remember the last time
I cried,
And someone held me close,
And told me it was going to be alright.
It feels so good to cry.

But it feels better with someone by your side.
A voracious world indeed they say. And it will be all black, white or grey; but I wouldn't dare to dream a rainbow in one lifetime. How many are there anyway? In one life time? Three? Four?
Maybe a couple more if you have swallowed hundred galleon liters of freedom in one breath; and are on a roller coaster that goes chasing all the sunshine the only star can offer to shine.

One lifetime- how long is it really? Not long enough to imagine yourself as a majestic monolith, standing tall among the great Stone Age. Yet, this heart demands to dream, even if some dreams can be shady. There are still many people left in this world who have a desire for darkness to envelop them and show them how shattered pieces flow in the stream of blood and tears.


Oblivion serves as a savior to those who fear to know the secret, to swallow the truth. The truth is that all the days are consuming us. It is a lunatic who is eating up our seconds and whispering to the howling wind- 'it's time to go'. And sometimes, it stabs you with a frail cold voice; 'there is no time at all'. There is indeed a tragic flaw somewhere within the starlight and the constellations of stardust. For if it wasn't for time, life wouldn't be against us, it would be with us. Alas, we are just outnumbered with the help of passing days and seconds becomes our last breath, our last definition of living.


See, love isn't lascivious and neither is life. It stands on its own meaning, nothing more, and nothing less. Love is part of life and life gave itself to its contagious intoxicant and blended to become one. Thus, sometimes you wouldn't know how to differentiate from the greater good. Evil isn't it? You ask, 'Where the dark dreamscapes went to?' There are many that solely fathom darkness. There are souls who don't surround themselves with such secrets. They are familiar with death even though they are alive. They die while living. A malevolent disease some would say. It is truly not always about the angels.

Sometimes is about the survivors. The dreamers who are warriors; they shed blood within them and sell dreams in the corner of their bizarre mind. A short life and the survivors say- it still a good life my friend.
They fought those combats in the same battle each day, to the extent that the war itself became void. Then suddenly, they remember, the sky above- looks up and a pinch of star dust falls upon their eyes. Hope revealed itself and once again they believed in something. Something can be anything. It can be vague as these words or as mysterious as death. Nonetheless that was all they needed to bring back a meaning to a moment.

Conclusion; A life tucked into a bottle of stolen stars- usually named as days by those simply breathing. The living, the dead, the survivors, the warriors, the dreamers and the ones that despise life itself- they have one thing in common. They all believe that the stars hold a reason. A reason that tells them that there might be one more day. One more day to believe in all the constellations of secrets in this universe. One more day to dance with the fallen poetry that sings from one tree to another. One more day to be under the shadow of the branches and let the wind rearrange the twigs onto the bodies that is so afraid to live. The chances are that the rainbows will not shine on your death bed, not all the stars would remember your name and the trails you have left will remain hidden. But those who dared to breathe in pain and still believed in love, those will be remembered deeply if not widely. And that is one life for you- merely a constellation of days.
A poetic prose.
Everyone hates me.

They think I'm the bad guy.
I'm the hater.
The negative vibe.
The one who kills.
The Devil.

They don't think I have feelings.
They think I don't care,
That I like being here.
That it doesn't **** me
To have Satan as father.

Do you think I'm proud
That he was banished from heaven?
That I like
Watching people suffer?

Death is not my specialty-
It never was.
I pray secretly
For a better life.

Helping, apparently,
Is a sin.
The smell of demise
Leaves me melancholy.

My tears
Are tattooed on my face.

These harsh words
Have been engraved onto my skin.
I have never been happy
With a sinner for a dad.

How can I pray to God,
When he is the spoken enemy?

How can I hope
When it has been crushed by all his followers?

I don't have friends-
They're all scared of me.

I have only lived to see
Fear.
No one has ever loved these red eyes.

Red from crying.
Red from hurting.
Red from a broken heart.

I can only write my ache.
But no matter how I try,
No one can relate.
Or care.

The worst kind of pain
Is the one that cannot be described.

That's me,
The indescribable agony.
Everybody seems to have problems,
Claiming theirs are the worst.

What happened to people being happy?
A wanderer of stardust like no other, does not ask why,
The mountain dew don’t weep nor cry.
Transparent and pure in its own plight,
Some phenomenon just shines that bright.
Just like the rainbow in the sky.

A lost traveler with a bow tie,
Remember your strength as you scrape by.
The battle goes on and you are the only knight.
A wanderer of stardust like no other.

True love is vast as the blue sky,
Even if the enemies deny.
You keep your armor on and fight.
Till the end of twelfth night-
For you know heaven is nearby.
A wanderer of stardust like no other.
Rondeau consists of three stanzas, a quintet (5 lines), a quatrain (4 lines) and a sestet (6 lines), giving a total of 15 lines.
The first phrase of the first line usually sets the refrain R it is admissible to use the whole line used as the refrain.
The rhyme scheme is: R. a. a. b. b. a .... a. a. b. R. .... a. a. b. b. a. R.
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