My coil feels broken.
My lips they are charred.

I lay down in my filth
And cough up more.

I ***** for something.
I find Nothing.

Wake up, and turn the morning on.
I watch as the flowers in my yard still slumber.
Put my hands on the back of my head and break a smile.
The pale blue sky smiles back saying, "It's been a while."

Take a ride in my car down to the soft and hazy beach.
Waves applaud my entrance; a never ending ovation.
A casual glance at the birds that pass on by
Never even glimpse in my direction with glass eyes.

Laying down the ocean sings me its lullabies.
The sand buries me with its careful hands.
The tide must be making its way in.
Sweet smell of salt. The ocean winds.

I feel so at peace. Though the day has yet to begin.
The sun catches up with its morning. Rushing.
When the noise starts to break through,
I start to leave.What a beautiful day it was looking to be.

Combusting into green flames
The photographs bleed black smiles.

Fumes inhaled. Stinging the eyes.
A twisted mass of flesh lay on the ground.

Breaking the dark for a moment.
Their hearts slowly shimmer out.

Looking at their faces
It seems they lied.

Crumbling into mere soot
They stare at me no more.

I wish there was an easier way of handling it.
To be always tied to a constant current of worry and doubt
provides no time to breathe, relax, and surround myself with
the ones I love.

Because of how I've left myself without a future
I am left stranded. No one to run to. No one to
reach.

Days seem to slip and flick by as they do
on a boring novel. Nothing worth remembering
and nothing really for waiting anxiously for.

The only pieces I remember are the ones that
fell out onto the floor.
I don't think I am even left with a spine anymore
now that I think about it.

I'm almost wishing I could just skip to the end.