You are everything
you pretend to be.

The best thing about life
is finding the simple patterns.

When I hear a guy say "I love you" it's become a habit to yell at them and say "Don't you ever utter those words to me again!!" then get up and leave....

When a guy comes up to me and says "****, you look good today"
it's become a habit to look at them and say "Oh, so I look like **** every other day?" then get up and leave...

When a guy comes up to me and puts his arm around my waist it's become a habit to remove his arm and say "Don't touch me" then walk away....

When a guy tries to make the move and kiss me it's become a habit to put my hand in front of his lips and say "Don't even go there" then walk away....

Ever since you left it's become my new habits to get up and leave....kinda like you did....just not giving them the chance to actually *hurt me like you did...

I think they laugh at me
Maybe because I'm strange
Could I be a somebody
Or is that a bit deranged

Can't they see I'm the same
I bleed just like they do
They treat me as if I'm lame
Ignoring me is their rule

So are you picking on the disabled
Thinking we're not fit to work
Because you wonder if I'm able
To be like everyone else who work

I never asked to be this way
I try to forget that horrid past
Not thinking of that terrible day
I wish that memory faded fast

I'm human, I am not someone lower
I'm human, stop knocking me down
I'm human, so I might be slower
I'm human, now put away that frown

A shadow of night
Hope festering among stars
My heart clutched in
The palms of my hand
As thoughts wield into luminous scars

A lost affection resurfaced by light
A habit, that is
Whispered as time etches Her might
And through the weight of Her fists
Need not to dwell for what is missed

So I collected the remnants of my heart
And began to ask from my very vain soul
What yet that is not the light?
I turned the coals from my eyes into rubies
And my heart opened to the entire world

-

I wrote you a love letter,
sent it to you through the mail
Barely legible (it was my handwriting)
but something that came straight from my heart
You said it was the most beautiful
thing you have ever received

And I just want you to know,
I meant every word

Do people actually fall in love?
I've never wanted to dance
in the road in a rain shower
with a man so beautiful
he makes my chest hurt.

No one has ever made
my heart skip a beat,
except when it was fear.

Do people actually fall in love?
It all seems like lust to me.
Lust is such an empty thing.
Love is supposed to be warm,
Burning hot, even.
It's supposed to make you feel full.
But lust is all I see,
Like a match,
Intense and fiery,
But fleeting.

It's not love.