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Amanda Shelton Jul 2019
Upon these strings you tug
on me, you are a puppeteer
always pulling on my limbs
moving me, pushing me to
the floor.

But still I rise,
I never fall too far
from a stable place,
stumbling but still
I rise and shine like
a star crossing the night sky
leaving my dreams behind.

Upon the setting sun
I slowly rise beyond
the pitch black of the sky
burning bright for all to see.

I bow in my orbital frame
smiling for you and all
who gaze upon my
dusty surface.

© 2019 By Amanda Shelton
Amanda Shelton Apr 2017
Upon unspoken words,
I lie next to you.

Like a whispering wind,
I blow my kisses into your beam,
as I watch you devour my dreams.

Our love is like a beckon;
no ships will crash upon our shores,
as long as our moon shines brightly
from our lovers moor.  

**© By Amanda D Shelton
Amanda Shelton May 2021
Dear Dreamer,
Your dreams are birthed
in the cover of night.

You collide with the stars
as your eyelids fall,
and awaken all possibilities.

Dreams are sweeter than
honey or wine.

Some are filled with
nightmare’s and shadows
stalking each step you make.

A night to remember,
a night of delight,
a night for moonlight travelers,
traveling on a blanket of stars
and the moons light is their cover.

© By Amanda Shelton
Amanda Shelton Mar 2024
Upon this lonely night,
I ponder on the stars,
as they gaze upon the earth
from their heavenly bow.

My heart is somewhere else,
my mind is lingering there too.

The night is like a curtain of
darkness, it slowly fell upon
the day as the sun bowed for
its heavenly host and left the
stage and the moon came
beaming bright like a spotlight
to smile upon the night.

Smile wide moon man, smile
bright for its your time to
shine tonight.

©️ 2024 By Amanda Shelton
Amanda Shelton Dec 2021
Upon the rising sun
my soul took flight,
as the morning rolled
in on the foggy view
beams of light woke me
with such a sight.

As the quiet atmosphere
was broken life began to
breathe and woke with
eyes wide open.

The skirt of morning lifted
upon winter's embrace.

©️ 2021 By Amanda Shelton
Amanda Shelton Oct 2018
The outside perfume rushes
through the open door,
reminding me of the season,
Fall is making home
upon the land.

Autumn blows her kisses
upon my cheeks, leaving
a cold chill to roll down
my back.

The trees bow their leafs,
as they slowly fall and
change color.

Mother autumn is no stranger
to the Meadows and Hill’s,
she visits once a year.

© 2018 By Amanda D Shelton
Amanda Shelton Aug 2016
Mother Nature sighs as she opens her eye's
behind the star's in the skies,
as she opens her hands
she reveals the moon
while she keeps the planet's in tune.

© By Amanda D Shelton
I wrote this poem when I was 7 year's old. Well my mom wrote it down for me while I told her the poem because I didn't know how to spell. If only there was spell check back when I was 7, I would have wrote it down myself. :-)
Amanda Shelton Apr 2018
Life can be hard,
Life can seem heavy at times.

Life can be like a fog,
rolling over your parade
so no one can see
the floats going by.

But once it rains,
once you get rest and clean,
life can seem like
a cool breeze
or a slowing rollercoaster
ready to release for
the next passengers.

Patience is what we need,
also love from everyone
and God.

This too shall pass
just try to remember
where you came from
and where you want
to head from now.

© 2018 By Amanda D Shelton

“To recovery to discovery, life is taken stride by stride, moment by moment. You might get cut alone the way but wound’s heal and stragthen.” © 2018 By Amanda D Shelton

I wrote this for a friend.
Amanda Shelton Oct 2018
How does one see past the murky
waters?

I am gasping for air
as you watch me struggle,
I can sense you are there
seated upon the shore.

You push me under before I have
time to grab another mouth
full of air.

As I come up again
you are relentless you
make it harder for me to
climb ashore.

My heart is laying beneath
your feet, you have left
it bruised and beat.

I will never win against your
sin, you are blinded by your
mind’s broken eyes.

You accused me of nonsense
with no fairness, you don’t
give me a chance.

You judge me,
you damaged me,
you push me until
I lose everything I hold dear.

You don’t care,
you don’t see the love
I have only for you,
I haven’t left you,
I haven’t hurt you,
you still don’t care.

There is nothing I can say or do
to open your eyes, that’s up to you.

I will be here setting in my tear’s,
remembering the good times we had.

Like a dream our love faded away
upon your lack of measure it slipped
from my lips.

All you did was watch me scream,
I LOVE YOU! While I died underneath
your blind eyes.

I LOVE YOU!

How does one see past the murky waters?

I hope this is but a dream.

© 2081 By Amanda Shelton
Amanda Shelton Oct 2020
Muse Of Harmony
______

Upon the wind
I ride the breeze,
like a cowboy
rides his horse.

I’m a free soul wondering,
my light never fades,
for I shine like a star.

I am brighter in the dark.

See me glide,
on the north winds
I fly.

The deep blue sea
is my lover,
she never forgets me.
She rises to my ovation,
her tides deep and
always rolling.

Upon the wind I came,
upon the ocean waves
I’m leaving.

Naked and true,
my life is written
upon these pages
for you.

Don’t cry for me,
rejoice instead.

My life I lived with
God on my side and
the devil lost me
before he found me.

My poetry is the blueprints
to my disteny,
I write line by line
formatting the path of
least resistance.

I tug you in with my
bleeding ink smears,
smudging my life onto
these webpages I built.

Its a rythme to my rhymes
and a mission for my life.

This is my Gothic muse,
it shines in the dark,
my poetry bleeds through
the depths of your views.

Even my shadow
comes to play,
tipping the table
spilling my chaos,
staining these pages
with my deepest sorrows
and depths of my expressions.

This became an ocean of grief,
a beautiful breeze,
a forget me not litter.

Forevermore,
my heart is free
for I set it loose
upon this stage.

© 2020 By Amanda Shelton
Amanda Shelton May 2021
Upon the rising sun,
my pain has begun.

Within the night
I take flight.

Upon the breeze I am
like a sneeze, I blow about
searching for relief.

©️ 2021 By Amanda Shelton
Amanda Shelton Jul 2017
I was accused and abused,
I trusted a man who stole right from my hand.

Why?
Because I believed if someone says they love you
that means they have respect for you.
I am wrong,
love doesn't make someone trustworthy or a nice person.

Being honest happens
when someone is truthful,
Being nice happens
if someone is truly nice.

If you are a nice person deep inside you won't find it hard to be kind.
You won't have to work at it,
because it's been there the whole time.

I have been told by one person ever,
How he thinks I am horrible
and dishonest,
when I am too sick to even care
to be mean or cruel,
I never was a dishonest fool.
I never cared to lie,
I would rather work for my dime.

I have fought for survival,
I didn't get here by cheating
and taking what I didn't work for.  

He did,
He stole from me
and lied to my family and friends.
He didn't bat an eye,
He showed no morals.
Yet he was quick to blame me
telling me something is wrong
with my mind.
He never admitted to his crime's.

I feel hated and used,
horribly accused:
by a man who used I love you
until it hurt me.

Sadly I have to tell you,
I am ashamed of him.
I am ashamed that he treated me
in such a way.
I am ashamed that he judged me
poorly and that he judged me at all.

Love is not judgemental,
Love is not boastful,
Love doesn't care how old you are,
Love doesn't care what raise you are,
Love doesn't tell you lies,
Love doesn't spit in your eye,
Love is a feeling that transcends
all time.*

*© 2017 Amanda Shelton
Amanda Shelton Jan 2019
I once thought love was
a magical place, where everything
suddenly falls into place.

Sadly I have learned the truth,
love hurts worse than a rotting tooth.

It can be ugly too,
full of hurt and struggles.

I am left chocking on my tears
while my heart tore apart
bruised and fragile like porcelain,
it broke into a thousand words
bleeding from my wounds (poetry).

It flows so easily,
like hot wax melting over the
wick it hardened but without form
or structure. It falls apart
in your hands.

I burst into a puddle of tears,
for my visual can no longer
hold the pressure.

© 2019 By Amanda Shelton
Amanda Shelton Feb 2019
Within this suffering
I live on with burning
passion, though I wrought
like iron I slowly break down
and rust, I breathe.

My roots are broken but
still I work like everyone else,
I just do it differently.

I burst like energy surging from
this life, I am structured
like a house with a computer
running everything.

I am the programmer of
my own existence, but I am not
the boss, for I work for God
who created us.

© 2019 By Amanda Shelton
Amanda Shelton Mar 2023
You've got spiders in your smile,
cobwebs in your heart, stitches hold
together your dislocated mind,
your unhinged and vile.

You're memory stinks like toxic
water from the grimmest pools ever
used, it's a sewer full of poo and ***.

Your loveless heart is soft and black,
its black mold has grown,
its fuz is coming out of the creaks
grabbing for its victims.

In between the infection of your
festering mind you will find, passed
victims you've collected trapped
inside scar tissue from passed
infections.

You are a crazy thought that runs
circles in my head, while yelling
profanities and accusations.

You are a narcissist and an infection
upon my mental health.

©️ 2023 By Amanda Shelton
Amanda Shelton Jun 2019
My mind never doubted,
my heart is never empty,
my life is full of empty
promises I’ve made to myself.

But my faith never wades,
for it’s like a powerful wave
crashing ashore.

My candle is always yearning
burning for your time,
like undying embers
faulted by there ashes.

None can measure my Lords
grace and mercy, for none
is as mightier as he
my creator.

© 2019 By Amanda Shelton
Amanda Shelton May 2019
Within the porcelain chamber
of my beating heart
the walls are fragile falling apart.

You’ve left me bruised
and crumbling to pieces
you never tried to fix
my broken pieces.

Instead you tread upon
my bed after you stole
the warmth of the covers.

You never gave me the support
I need, instead you stole
the main beam that
holds up the walls
to our foundation.

© 2019 By Amanda Shelton
Amanda Shelton Mar 2020
Hello my old friend,
I welcome you to sit.

My invitation is always open,
your my muse, my inspiration.

Your my shadow, my beating
mind vibrates as you enter
my space.

Upon the waves of thought
you come freely and
without shame or block.

Hello my old friend,
I welcome you to sit.

My muse you are, a bold
breath of excitement rushes
over my life as the poetry
begins to fly, I can only
comply and release the
passion I try to hide.

Hello my old friend,
I welcome you once again.

© 2020 By Amanda Shelton
Amanda Shelton Sep 2018
Whispers of yesterday linger
on my mind, your presence is
like a lingering perfume.

Upon my lips you always stay,
your taste never fades.

Upon my heart you hold a tight grip,
for you are like a thorny rose
to my heart’s contentment.
It grows.

Oh how like the moon you are,
You make my heart swoon
as you sway my way.

Lovers we are,
companions in this suffering
life we live.

We grow like weeds,
two lovers entangled together
on the vine.

Oh so divine,
are such things as love.

© 2018 By Amanda Shelton
Amanda Shelton Jan 2019
Painful silence scratches at my heart, leaving deep marks.

You never explained yourself,
instead you leave me in the dark.

You just left me without a goodbye, you didn’t even think about my feelings or anything else.

I don’t understand your lack of words, I am not sure what happened to you for you haven’t given me any response.

You are a theft in the night,
you silently came and stole my heart only to drop it like a piece of trash.

How can you say I love you?
After everything you have done
you dropped me, neglected me
and never gave me a reason why?

The worst type of evil is the silent kind, those who have something to hide are the silent ones, they don’t care about anything you have to give them not even your life.

I will never understand why someone would say I love you and then without any reason drop you.

Where’s the love you said you hold for me?

All I’ve got is a bucket of tears,
a painful burning, and a used mind
you left behind.

Nothing I say gets through to you,
it’s like talking to a brick wall
or quicksand my words fall in but never comes out.

You stole my heart and my everything, with no remorse for the damages you caused me.

You should be ashamed of yourself.
I call you my love because
that’s what you are to me.

Sadly you don’t hear a word I speak, your too busy judging me.

My love is sick.

© 2019 By Amanda Shelton
Amanda Shelton Nov 2022
I can't hide or run,
pain is on my back.

I built my road but pain
got cheeky and damaged
my plans.

It laugh's in my face
while setting on my back
twisted and bent.

Scratching and clawing
at my skin, pains no friend.

Poking and pinching,
bringing depression
and anxiety.

Pains a cheeky boy with
claws for hands and a
creepy ear to ear smile
with a mouth full of
razer teeth.

©️ 2022 By Amanda Shelton
Amanda Shelton Dec 2018
Amongst the books I am
torn, tattered, and worn,
my pages are yelled,
my binding fragile and
frayed by age.

My story sat for awhile
before a friend found my
shelf, such poetry I wrought
in slow progress; it is dripping
from the pen I hold within
my poetic brain, and you became
the reader of my poetic tongue.

Like rats my thoughts gather
in a pack of many before
looking for attention and food
so here I am writing for you.

It’s a dilution of words
I spit out for you, like
a flaming candle blowing
smoke into your mind.
I linger on your thoughts
before you ***** my wick
releasing my last bit of
light before I become a memory.

These are the poetic bindings
that hold me tightly
to this world. I am like a
violin you strum my strings
and I will begin to sing.

My poetic bindings hold
me tightly allowing me
to write these lines
of wrought and desire.

This is my poetic binding.

© 2018 By Amanda Shelton
Amanda Shelton Jun 2020
I slowly became rooted within
the fiber’s of my chair, it
supports my life of pain
and grind.

With its needless blues and greens rushing through my veins.

The blues are sadness,
the greens are my favorite
things I miss the most.

I once had a dream now
I am lost amongst the clouds
and the fiber’s of my life.

I once was a shy girl,
I grew into a poetic format
that is rooted in my life like
the chair is rooted in my strife.

My blues are easy to express,
it flows with a slight pressure
a push and shove. Once I open
the gate it floods the page with
my tears and faith.

With my broken heart I fell apart
but poetry keeps it hanging on
by a thread. My love bleeds out…

Love gave me doubt and a reason
to run out. I became its broken jar
full of bruises and tears.
Don’t forget the poetic formats
that bleed from my roots and drowned me in tears.

You became a scar upon my heart.
The scars are inspiration burning
hot and it grows wild deep inside
its depths. Now its rushing,
gushing out.

© 2020 By Amanda Shelton
Amanda Shelton Oct 2023
That like a seed,
poetry grows for me.

It roots itself deeply
inside my headspace,
without poetry I am empty.

Like a forest ideas thrive
within my poetic mind,
I am always traveling inside
my forest of thoughts picking
weeds and gathering leafs.

When I fall I fall hard,
and poetry follows me
into the darkness of my
life. There it lights a fire
and brightens the darkest
of nights and it guides me
through the trees.

Poetry is like a moon
and I am its orbit. I
laso it and bring it closer
for everyone to admire
its pots and beautiful blooms.

It's a lingering sent, a ghostly
memory of a flame lit centuries
before my birth.

The poetic formats never fade
for they live forever within
the minds of the readers.

©️ 2023 By Amanda Shelton
Amanda Shelton Sep 2018
I am fleeting when I think of you, I know when you are here everything straightens into a formatted line.

You came into my life when I didn't expect it, you hit me with your words and formats like an emotional brick.

I tried giving you up,
releasing you from my mind
but you came back everytime.

You can seem cumbersome at times
but you grew on me
you became comfortable to me.

You taught me how to communicate
and how to express myself,
you taught me honesty and form.

You are poetry and a gift from the heavenly Father. I am thankful you were given to me.

© 2018 By Amanda Shelton
I started writing poetry at the age of seven. It hit me after I heard the church singing. I was almost seven years old. My first poem was Mother Nature. I rewrote the poem once but this is the original.

Mother Nature

Mother Nature sighs as she opens her eyes behind the blue skies, she slowly opens her hands to reveal the moon. All while she keeps the planets in tune.

© By Amanda Shelton
Amanda Shelton Jun 2021
Upon the line I lay down
my heart, it beats fast
and very deep.

Emotion’s seep from
the depths of me.

It poor’s out so easily,
like a flood a wave break’s
the ****, I am forced to
release the passion that
swell’s with in.

Poetry pools upon this page,
gathering slowly as I reveal
the deepest parts of my reality.

©️ 2021 By Amanda Shelton
Amanda Shelton Dec 2020
Whilst wandering your dark
and tormented way you came
to my darkened doorway, and
I greeted you with a warmth
and loving light.

Upon these pages I write,
an expression away to
share my life.

I bring oceans and dreams
to life with my poetic
devices and digital pen.

Each line is formatted and
designed with you in mind.

I have a gloomy disposition
but a beautiful valley of
blooming flowers and a star
lit sky to light your way.

I am like a unicorn amongst
horses, my unique views draw you in.

My little heart beats like
a poetic drum.

I bleed poetic ink, leaving
my smudges upon your screen.

©️ 2020 By Amanda Shelton
Amanda Shelton Mar 2020
The Cheshire cat once told me
I am lost only if I forget
I have several ways to get
where I am going.

Nothing is in black and white,
on no, it’s vibrant colors
full of passion and waves
of blues and greens and
billions of fish.
I am one of them.

I am like a net
I cast myself out
into the wide open
seas, bring in my little
fishies. Sometimes I come
back empty so I have to
try again.

Never forget you’ve got
several ways to get where
your going. Just keep going.

You are only held back
by your forgetfulness.

The path has always been
in front of you. Just take
the first step.

© 2020 By Amanda Shelton
Amanda Shelton Jun 2019
Upon my faith grows
my strangth,
deeper and deeper
my roots dig deep
into the hollow.

I become that like
a tree, my seed is small
but my roots are strong.

The more I pray
the deeper I grow
deep into the hollow,
no devil will pull me
a stray.

My faith is strongly
rooted within the depths
of the hollow, I will
always pray.

My roots,
my roots,
dip deeply into
the hollow.
I kneel to pray.

Dear Lord,
thank you for my strength,
thank you for the blessing
of your ever growing spark.
Aman!

My roots grow deeply
into the barren landscape
every autumn my leafs
will fall, revealing my
trunk leaving you
a reminder I too am
a survivor.

© 2019 By Amanda Shelton
Amanda Shelton Jul 2020
Should you be sad for
my ocean eyes?

Love bleeds from my broken heart, felling my dreams with drowning sorrows of past experiences of lovely
blues and greens.

The waves are a reminder of
the broken dreams we suffered
together, as our love crashed
into the shore.

I regret nothing but waiting
for so long to walk away
from these bruised memories
of who you are.

I make new dreams healing from
the wounds I’ve dressed with
my armored lives I grew with
weeds and broken hearts,
I keep them tightly sealed
within my caged self.

Yet, I let my sorrows fly free
like a bird crying for the sky.

Should you be sad for
my ocean eyes?

Love crashed ashore breaking
the tides with its chaotic lies.

Love came upon a whispering wind, touched the depths of
who I am, and kissed my soul leaving me with ocean eyes.

I am weeping under the trees
of broken dreams where my
lost lovers crimes are barried
deep within the earth, there
in the hollow girth I placed
a stone in memory of you.

With deep sorrow I say goodbye
to my pain and suffering.

Such dreams are to come
when I close my ocean eyes.

© 2020 By Amanda Shelton
In memory of my sorrow and broken heart. Peace is in my life. I feel free. I let go of my love for he is a broken soul I can't fix. I am okay with that.
Amanda Shelton Sep 2022
She’s got diamonds in her eyes,
she glistens and shines.

Through the night I don’t
need the light for she shines
for me.

Like a candle in the window,
she’s the stars to my sky’s.
We travel far and wide on
the wings of our imagination
and we fly like smoke upon
the night air on strings of
poetry.

She brings me my muse,
ideas abound as the moon
smiles upon the night my
heart swoons with gay poetic
delight.

Poetry is her name, she’s my
muse and inspiration. In the
depths of my lonely nights
we fly together and I forget
I am alone.

Poetry follows me everywhere
I go, like a shadowed muse.

©️ 2022 By Amanda Shelton
Amanda Shelton Oct 2023
Sometimes I feel like
I am living in a square,
I am stuck within a
windowless house.

Sometimes I feel like
I am living in a triangle,
it's getting tight in here
the walls keep disappearing
trapping me inside nothingness.

Sometimes I feel like
I am living in a circle,
it seems internally unfair.

Sometimes I feel like
I am living in outer space,
I keep floating away and
reality comes to rescue me
it brings me back to earth
and my feet touch the ground
reminding me of everything
that is important.

It keeps me here
just for the moment.

This is my shapeless struggle,
it changes.

©️ 2023 By Amanda Shelton
Amanda Shelton Jun 2019
The perpetual kiss of the night,
embarrassed by its foggy
hug, its mystery is here to
entrance our needs for
beauty and the monsters
lurking beneath its misty banks.

Such things crawl around in the
underbelly of bleakness of pitch
black of the night. Waiting for
our eyes to close, to drift off to sleep.

The moon hangs low
in its bow, orbiting the mystery
we call night. Such love it has
for the sky in which it calls home.

Alone moon beam lost
within the mysterious night.

© 2019 By Amanda D Shelton
Amanda Shelton Oct 2021
Upon a bed of rocks I lay
alongside my pain.

It wakes me early in between
12 and 1 am.

It comes uninvited, cloud’s
gather too, fogging my mind
until I am confused.

A heaviness settles down
upon my brow and chest,
making breathing difficult
and laboured.

Pain separates me from the
outside world, it forces me
to suffer silently and alone.

It’s been awhile since I
felt well and capable.

I am 40 and this year
brought me illness and
pain.

Hopefully next year will be
better.

I’m praying and meditating
to help me deal.

©️ 2021 By Amanda Shelton
I edited a spelling error. I am using my phone to post and spell check likes to post whatever it likes. It doesn't happen often so I don't check my posts after publishing. I am going to start reading my post before publishing them. ❤️🙂
Amanda Shelton Jun 2024
If I had only...

I was able to forget the abuse,
and grew in the light
instead of the darkness
I was forced into,
and ran away from the monsters
before they hurt me,
and ignored the negative views
from others,
and spoke when I needed to be heard.

But it's not too late to live my life...

So here I am speaking my truth
so I can grow past the abuse.

I am like a struggling worm trying
to break free from the dirt
I was force fed.

©️ 2024 By Amanda Shelton
Amanda Shelton Dec 2021
The cobwebs settled year’s ago,
the dust gathered on the table,
the placements are falling apart.

After decades of fringe and
grungy textures and dried
ink smeared on the walls my
poetry through the centuries.

My poetic heart is choking
on the ashes left behind.

My violin strings are fragile
and ready to break.

My love song flew away
on the wings of a Lark
looking for it’s heart.

This is my Vintage heart
wrapped in decay.

©️ 2021 By Amanda Shelton
I edited this poem for spelling errors. My phone was having problems when I posted the original. Spell check ***** sometimes. 👍
Amanda Shelton Jan 2022
I have seen humanities
shadow dancing beyond
my dreaming eyes.

I’ve seen clouds of gray
fade into white and blue
skies.

I’ve seen death and life,
babies birthed and the
sick die.

I’ve seen night turn into day.
The moon danced across the
sky until it slowly slipped
behind the earths curve.
The sun stole the spotlight
with its larg yellow *****.

I have seen computers rise
from the minds of geniuses.

The phones evaluation
from dieling the operator
to receiver into cell phones
capable of fast processes.

I’ve seen the environment
slowly die by human hands.

I am hoping to see a future
free from racism and discrimination.

Better healthcare and education
for all.

Better justice systems
to serve and protect our
communities.

My vision for our future
is two possibilities.

We will prosper and grow.

Or we fade slowly into
the vast spaces we’ve
been searching from
the beginning of humanity.

Our greatness is holding on
by a single thread of hope.

Peace, love and change.

To become great we need to do
all three. Until then we are
but fading stars chosing to
go out like a tiny spark.

©️ 2022 By Amanda Shelton
Amanda Shelton Jul 2022
Just around the corner lives my
shadow, it's a wonderer of time a
creative design made up in my own mind.

Senses reach out, beyond the boundaries of my imagination
I fly alongside my creativity.

For a long time... I floated in my mind space, lost to realities touch.

But the other shadows came in and
sat for awhile, gave me a line of
communication, I became a vibration slowly changed my frequency until it hit me.

The pills flowed through my veins,
counseling became my best friend,
depression became personal, anxiety
became fragile.

I started out cracked like porcelain,
the pieces of my mind slowly became more defined and easier to control as mine.

Like a puppet on a string people tried to define me and mold me, but
I broke the mold and they were forced to let me go. I oozed all over the place until I was free from the mold they built for me.

I am bent, bumpy and porous, my joints creek like a chores with broken strings and holy drums, crack smack pop!
Let's Rock! 🤘

Welcome to my weird mind,
I am made from a unique design.

©️ 2022 By Amanda Shelton
This is about my autism and mental health.
Amanda Shelton Aug 2022
A narcissist is a dummy bear on crack. They have gummies for brains.

Viewing the world with mooching eyes, flirting with greed and gluttony, playing games with the devil.

The narcissist is no friend
of the family.

They are crude and thick with pollution and toxic waste.

The Narcissist brings nothing but
suffering and pain.

If you bump into a narcissist
in the wild, run and don't
look back.

A narcissist wants attention and
they don't like bold and brave people.

They chose victims by kindness,
reputation and intelligence.

The smarter and more popular you
are the more likely a narcissist
will strike at you.

You have to be smarter than they,
set boundaries and strict rules.

Don't allow anyone to break your
security or your self esteem.

A narcissists biggest flaw is ego,
strike them in the ego ***** and
watch them turn blue and fall.

Find their weakness in their
gaslighting, use it to fight back.

They blame everyone but themselves for their actions.

©️ 2022 By Amanda Shelton
This is inspired by my personal experiences with a narcissist. I have gone to college to study behavioral health and social science as well. Mental health was my best subject. I have personal experience with mental health as well as studied it for over 20 years. As a passion and necessity to understand my own mind, I researched the deepest parts of mental health. I was seven years old when I started being intrigued by behavioral health. My anxiety and paranoia brought me to a place of intriguing environment's that I wanted to face so I can get through my fear of suffering in silent pain. It was my candle in the darkest.
Amanda Shelton Jul 2017
You cling to me like cellophane,
wrapping yourself around myself
with your electric forked tongue,
as you drag each of my neurons
out into the world;
exposed they are,
as I am left to feel their
nakedness and chills.

I feel their
bite and electric fields;
their pain has become my friend.

**© 2017 Amanda D Shelton
I suffer from three different disorders that can be very painful. This poem is the best way I can explain it to you. Maybe you can relate, maybe not but that's up to you. Live long and prosper my fellow poets.
Amanda Shelton Sep 2023
When I fall I fall hard but recover fast.

I don't want to run away
from my last panic attack.

I don't want to face pain
like its my last breath.

I don't want to skip one minute
to reach the last.

I want to take my time
as if its my last.

I want to enjoy what I have,
and live for the moment.

I'd rather skip the thought
of death and remember life
as if its my best friend.

I don't want to be a fading star
waiting for my last burst.

All the times I am holding on to
is nothing, for I am never coming back.

I will be a memory and
my actions will be all
that is left.

Don't say goodbye,
and leave forever.

Oh no, I am lighting my candle
and leaving it in my window
so you all can return and
see my flame, its burning
on this page.

©️ 2023 By Amanda Shelton
Amanda Shelton Oct 2016
Upon the waking of a dream
I watched as reality
steamed.

Dripping wet with tears of sorrow,
all seamed doomed,
yet here comes the marrow.

Upon the waking of a dream,
I watched as it melted at the seems.

Dreary I fell into worry
and doomed digression,
all became dark,
full of murky depths,
and monsters whom leaped at me
from the darkest dreams I ever dream't.

**© By Amanda Shelton
Amanda Shelton May 2024
One breath, one minute,
one smile, led to many
moments of heartache.

Breathe they say,
yet life's choking me.

Wait they say,
yet life's running and
I have only one chance
to catch up.

Be happy they say,
yet depression doesn't ask
for an invitation.

I was told whatever I do
will come back to me ten fold.

Yet it seems what everyone else
does is folding in on me because
I breathed, I waited, and
I smiled.

©️ 2024 By Amanda Shelton
Amanda Shelton Dec 2021
I've fallen so far,
lost myself on the way down.

I flew for a moment before
crashing colliding with my
broken heart.

My pieces shattered so easily,
I couldn't find the strength
to put them back together again.

I stayed on the ground for
awhile, the mud and salt
steeped into my lungs, choking
my breath until nothing was left.

Nothing but tears.

©️ 2021 By Amanda Shelton
OCD
Amanda Shelton Sep 2017
OCD
One becomes two,
two becomes three,
but but but wait
go on and on and on and...

1,2,3 go again,
1,2,3 go again,
1,2,3 go again,
you see I can't help being on repeat.
repeat. repeat.
Do it again. again. again.

1,2,3 go again,
1,2,3 go again,
1,2,3 go again,
you see I can't help being on repeat.
repeat. repeat.
Do it again. again. again.

Now lock your door,
nope unlock it again,
now lock your door,
nope unlock it again.

1,2,3 do it again. again. again.
1,2,3 do it again. again. again.
1,2,3 do it again. again. again.

...

OCD yep on no here I go again.
again. again.

**© 2017 By Amanda Shelton
I hate OCD. It makes everything harder. I use to have problems with certain tasks because I have problems repeating. Though I can remember thing's better because I have OCD. My brain doesn't like to let go of information so I can remember thing's and not worry about it fading and changing. I have never lost my keys and I have been living in my apartment for seven years. I had to go to counseling to learn how to deal with my anxiety with dealing with OCD.
Amanda Shelton Apr 2022
Tears are my friends,
they release me from
the ******* of sorrow
and depression.

I don’t cry often,
I have to be very upset
to want to cry.

It’s painful because it uses
all of my muscles.

Sorrow is a strong emotion,
like a seed it plants it’s
roots hydrated by my tearful
release upon my plotted life.

Its needed to learn how to
cop with the ups and downs
of life.

Cry me an ocean so I can
learn to swim, dive and surf.

©️ 2022 By Amanda Shelton
Amanda Shelton Nov 2016
"Ocular migraine
leave's crystal light,
searing pain, blindness
as the vision clears
here comes more pain.

If you never experienced this
you are lucky.

I am 1 out of 200 people you might know
who have these types of ocular migraines,
according to the internet and my doctor."



© By Amanda D Shelton

Amanda Shelton Sep 2021
Oh such sorrow upon mornings
break soaks my pillow with
tears of grief.

Darkness vails what I
seek but patients and
company of others softens
the shadows and brings the
light of hope.

My mind wonder’s upon
the possibilities of release
from this doomed existence
that can be so bleak.

It is of heavenly design,
and faith.

To grieve is to know love,
to be released by emotional
stress, its to be freed from
the minds caged thoughts,
seeking meaning.

Ode to grief an unwanted
friend to many.

©️ 2021 By Amanda Shelton
Of velvety petals,
thy beauty grows
rising from the night shadows,
a rose blooms in the moonlight.

Thy thorny stem wraps around
the bushes, as thy scent lingers
in the night air, bringing its lovely
perfume for everyone to enjoy.

Your lacy trim and blood red decor
is so divine, it makes you shine
within an enthral sky.

Ode to thy rose,
may you bloom forever
within the enthral realm
of a great design as a poem
plotted and cultivated by
my poetic mind.

©️ 2025 By Amanda Shelton
Amanda Shelton Dec 2017
I love the winter,
cold, and calm.

Slowly life grows strong
and forgets about the summer
sun.

I too become somber, deep,
calm, and still; as the weather
blow's me a chilling kiss.

I ponder deeply,
upon the mornings dawning,
while I drink my coffee.

The sky turns gray, clouds
look like soaking cotton *****
heavy with rain.

I can smell the seasons change,
wafting through the air,
reminding me of past gatherings of
my family and friends.

The food is heavier, and full felling
when the holidays are near.

I love the colder weather,
I am always prepared for the cooler
air.

Ode to winter, and it's
beautiful white blankets
of snow, hot chocolate,
and forgotten treditions
from long ago.



**© 2017 By Amanda Shelton
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