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 Jan 2014 Alyssa Yu
Ian Cairns
Realistically
this delusion
could become
our source of inspiration
but chronologically speaking
our chronicles
could never combine
because destiny penned
a rhyme where I'd say
goodbye too swiftly
 Jan 2014 Alyssa Yu
Ian Cairns
I have these scars on my elbows
They're from a long time ago
And I never really appreciated their protrusion until now
Pretending to prefer unblemished skin
But when I was 10 and still believed in Superman
I had a tendency to ride my bike with stuntman speed
Forgetting about the frivolous concerns that consumed me
Hoping my kryptonite never crept up from underneath sidewalk bumps
Flipping my ambition over handlebars
Leaving the pieces of my reflections painted crimson along the asphalt
Scattered like hand-picked petals of an ill-advised ascetic
I am me, I am not, I am me, I am not
So I always wore my helmet as a precautionary measure
It contained my thoughts from running straight through my skull
And becoming neighbors with the pavement
But I never wore my elbow pads
They collected dust beside the waste bin
Replacing security for sincerity
I improved my flexibility while losing some skin
And that was a trade off I was willing to make at the time
I finally felt alive
I was invincible on my bicycle
The sidewalk my only bully
The summer breeze my only friend
And at the time I never realized what it meant to be vulnerable
But those bike rides were the closest I would get
I was fixated on fitting in around my classmates
Accumulating fake friends by
Ripping insincerities out of my esophagus
And stapling them to my forehead
I stole my own identity
Morphing my puzzle piece and jamming it into the jigsaw
Claiming to be the missing link everyone was searching for
But what am I searching for?

I was lost on my own yellow brick road
I had two left feet and no right way to go
I stopped dead in my tracks
Hoping the soles of my feet would soak in the golden stones while
Singing Dorothy's hymn like spoken sin
I just want to fit in
I just want to fit in
I just want to fit in

Wondering if that was loud enough for Oz to hear me
I didn't have any magic slippers
And this situation was twisting towards witchcraft
I'm not even sure Oz can help me
You see these requests were a tall order for a tiny man
Who wore masks just like me
Oz and I were anonymous
Oz and I were synonymous
Using smoke and mirror tactics to terrorize the innocent
When in reality we were only playing tricks on ourselves
Hiding behind perfectly sculpted ****** expressions
And make-believe manuscripts
Doing basic impressions of manufactured mannequins
Out in the real world
I really needed to speak with the Scarecrow
The Tinman, the Lion, and Dorothy too
And investigate their stresses with relentless pursuit

The Scarecrow would tell me
Wisdom is wasteful for those
Without a strong appetite for improvement
But sometimes common sense can lead
The most sensible person astray
The Tinman would tell me
Compassion is constructed for
Tender hands to hold
But sometimes empathy can leave
The most charitable person betrayed
The Lion would tell me
Courage can be critical in
Times of distress
But sometimes vulnerability can make
The most sensitive person brave
And Dorothy would tell me
Home is paradise
Wrapped in picket fences
But sometimes a terrifying trip can bring
The most wary person escape
And suddenly it would occur to me
That strengths are just solid scars
We have confidence to display on our sleeves
And perfection can only permeate the souls willing to recognize
That faults shine golden too
So from here on out I'm placing my masks alongside my elbow pads
Both collecting dust beside the waste bin
Replacing security for sincerity
Finally embracing the scars on my skin
Now that is a trade off I'm willing to make
Because I want to feel alive again
 Jul 2013 Alyssa Yu
Ian Cairns
The truth is
I'm not sure
What needs to be said.
The syllables I've learned to form
Don't apply to situations where
Words remain inherently absent.
And too often we force our hand
To make phrases appear
Where they don't belong.

But something about
Silent speeches is appealing to me.
Because the power in your eyes reduce
The need for any type of sound.
And the shock waves your steps make
As you inch closer to mine
Create the sweetest melodies.
So all I will tell you is this:
Let's leave words out of this.
 Jul 2013 Alyssa Yu
Ian Cairns
Blind
 Jul 2013 Alyssa Yu
Ian Cairns
I think I'm going blind.
I'm under the impression you've disappeared.
That you're gone for good.
That you've eliminated yourself from my retinas in order to escape my mile wide stare.
That you've constructed homes under tombstones hoping I'd mistake you for
A box of under-appreciated skeletal remains
Because all you've ever wanted is to be dead to me.
Like you wanted my eyes to forget about their day job and resort to conceptualized adultery
Because God forbid I commit to an honest day's pay.
I've never intentionally visualized imaginary fabrications.
But the truth is, my eyes do everything but tell the truth.

1. My eyes write monotonous picture books with your face plastered on every single page
Just to recreate your physical beauty time and time again
So the world knows your look tops my mind's best seller list.

2. My eyes climb mountain tops and skinny dip in stormy seas
Because sometimes crazy is the only way I can get you to look at me.

3. My eyes fly hot air balloons carried by the echoes of your soft spoken sentences
As if exhaust pipes could spew such sweet nothings into the night sky.

4. My eyes invade foreign lands with every intention of burning down
Prehistoric villages and discovering your secret hideaway because I too
Want to know how it feels to savagely destroy former sacred territory.

5. My eyes struggle out of bed every morning.  Not even
Three shots of espresso can perk my eyes up enough
To allow the radiation you still give off enter my pores.

I think I'm going blind.
Or maybe I just can't see straight.
Or be straight up with you and tell you how it takes every part of me
To not gauge my own eyes out for betraying the rest of my body.
It takes every part of me to admit my misjudgments spawned the downfall of it all.
Because I told you I saw the two of us trekking through unfamiliar lands
With each stride another step towards our destiny.
Because I told you I saw something in your eyes
That gave mine the ability to smile.
Because I told you I saw us redefining what infinity
Looks like to the senseless visionary.
But my eyes don't tell the truth.
I'm going blind.
 Jul 2013 Alyssa Yu
Audrey Illena
Words can do so many things that we'll never understand
A heartbeat won't make you come alive the way one word can
The pictures that they paint can take your breath away
Goodbyes that they whisper will make you want to stay
When they are laced in hatred and fight to make you cry
You find that rhyme within you and realize it was lies
That words would never hurt you, only sticks and stones
Well now you're a few years older and left with broken bones.
When sweet words are spoken from someone that you love
You feel cupid catch you and carry you above
When words are hard to come by because your tongue is tied
It always seems as though your missing an important part of life
When words are placed in music, your soul is pierced within
Whether it be happy, sad or tragic, your heart is singing till the end.
Words can do so many things, and I've only said a few
But put thought before your speech because the power starts with you.
It's 2:38 am
I have again been
left alone
abandoned.
Just because they say
3 am is a time for the lonely
does not mean
it has to be sad.
I can be alone
and dress
like a soft grunge blogger
with heavy eyeliner
just for me
and i get to pick the music
at 2:38 am
It seems the better my life gets, the worse my writing is
 Jul 2013 Alyssa Yu
Ian Cairns
Take a quick glance along this ragged path
Expose your eyes to the travesties
Immerse your soul in indecency
Are you too blind to see
Or too busy to look?
Each step you take
Is another misfortune misinterpreted
As socially acceptable or politically correct
Do you want to keep moving forward
Viciously approaching infinity without proper perception?
Or would you rather
Embark on that same path
Slow down your stride
And make a meaningful mark
Take a few steps back
Take your shoes off
And take a seat
***** your feet
And make the street you walk on
A visible masterpiece
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