Every torturous moment
my being presses, pushes
against body from
within.

Peeling back skin
Tearing away at flesh
Agonizing pain numb
to the pulsing, raging.
Failing at all turns
At leaving this
wretched form.

Cursing the Gods for
damning me
to this hell.
A prison of humanity
Maddened in a cell.

Desires seep through
poisoning the world
around me, toxic.
Radiating on the sole
thought to escape.

and with the smoke in my lungs and his words flowing around me, I could feel the vibrations in my bones and I could hear the thumping of my heart as I sang along. What a beautiful day. What a beautiful life.

Suppression weights heavy in my hand.
Holding the bleeding,
beaten remnants of my essence.

Outstretched, stripped from my chest,
clinging to the soft ideals
of a peace to never come.

Words of hatred, poisons I have made
created in failed attempt to love.
Piercing me, debilitating daggers
wounded, body broken.

All energy exhausted pulling
farther from me the strings attached
to what was once life.

Heart in hand, destroyed mantle
of my physical being, beating slowly
Crimson paints the floor.

Instinct shields this torn entity
to protect the last connection
the undying belief in love.

My spoken word often
falls short of my
blood stained paper.
Where my heart spills
emotions only felt
with fingers between pages.

Words seasoned through the years,
lost love, heartache.
The many firsts and the lasts,
I experience my ink saturated tales.
Where one lives in a mysterious clarity
not received on the vocal reenactment.

Writing comes in waves, like the coast.
Overwhelmed, drenched in feeling,
fading then; waiting to crash back
against me eroding barriers.
To keep my detached self between
one tidal eruption breaking my
total defense from all intervention.

and I thought I was going to die that night
but I would never have been happier to die
alongside those people, in that place
I could smell the dirt and the leaves
so happy hearted and warm
and we stood steady as the stars in the woods
as the old pine fell we sang
and we cried, it was just a blessed morning.