have you ever had someone in your life who shouldn't be?

all they do is cause you pain and endless heartache but you can't seem to say fairwell.

the time and energy spent on someone who doesn't care you exists could be used to build up your nonexistent self esteem.

what does that say about your personality?

caring about someone who doesn't give a ****?

is it inspired and kind or just utterly stupid?

i know i'm in deep
when thinking of you
feels like
thinking of me.

i am so hopeful
yest so unhopeful
all at the same time

it's like that light
that you see
that tells you everything
will be okay
is like the sun on
a cloudy day;
it fades in an out
dimming and brightening

like a lightbulb
hanging on a thread -
hanging on to life

like a car
racing down
the free way
at two in the morning
the moments of darkness
after the faint moment
of brightness
as we drive under
street lamps.

i am so hopeful
and so hopeless
and i sway
like a pendulum
unable to find
a healthy balance

I always told myself that once the door closed, that was the end of the world. But I'm still here and my heart started beating again.
I'm not dead
Your giving me new reasons to laugh.
I'm not dead
I'm learning to feel again.
I know this is new.                        
I'm so cautious lately.
I was so certain I'd scare you away.
Your still here and your still smiling.

please do not tease me
with pretty words
and beautiful phrases

i take them in
like a parched man
scampers at the sight
of water

i marvel over them
much like humans admire
sunlight through
stain glass

and i cherish them
like a mother does
her first born
and hold them
close to my chest

do not tempt me
with kind words-
i'll start falling
as soon as they
fall from the
gap between
your lips

We honestly fit right,
I am forever yours,
You make me feel beautiful and alive,
Even though you're not mine to kiss.

Your body is perfect for mine,
But we'll never lay side by side,
I'll never feel your skin against me,
I'll never hold you tight at night at 9.

You'll never touch my face,
Or call me your princess,
You'll never intoxicate me with wine,
You'll never buy me expensive roses.

I'll never get the chance to fill your heart with joy,
Because you're not right for me but my heart thinks so.

How much can I say I love you
how many tears have I shed for you
please let me leave now
back into your kind arms

I don't want to see this through
please understand I love you
I want to leave my Lord
I want to be back into your kind arms

Take me now my sweet Lord
for I am so dislocated
I need you so very bad
I want your kind arms around me

My faith for you
my blood for you
please let me end this
and come back into your kind arms

I will always be misunderstood
a crazy fool from the hood
I would finish myself if I could
just to be back into your kind arms


By Christos Andreas Kourtis aka NeonSolaris
By NeonSolaris
© 2011 NeonSolaris (All rights reserved)