I wonder what you do everyday
I make believe that I have special powers
I cast projections out of nowhere behind glazed eyes
One shadow puppet that would dance at my will
But I let the strings loose and abandon role of director
I've been in this one man audience ever since
And it's enough for me.

I stare at the puppet as it remains still
So hypnotized illusions transform what I see
Sleeping silently and motionless, it's you now on the stage
I pause the show in fear of intermission
In a trance while watching you sleep
Dissatisfied ghosts urge the show to go on
But it's enough for me.

Uninvited imaginations tell me it's a waste of my powers
But I pay no attention nor move focus
I study your body and daydreams run free
Immersing myself in my dream's illusion
For fear of waking you from your sleep I use powers once in apparition
Slipping my hand into yours and laying beside you
Every night it is enough for me
To sleep alone and dream beside you.

I'm waiting for you to save me.
Because I am falling more than I fly
Because I pull harder instead of standing strong
Because they try to provoke doubt more often than I can retain happiness
Because their play keeps me on stage without any intermission
Because you watch my every move rather than ready hands to catch my fall
Because my love for you brings more attacks than angels
Because their air is more suffocating than breathable
Because
I'm falling
I'm tired
I'm restless
I'm crashing
I'm bruising
I'm choking

Because I need you to revive me.
I'm waiting for you to save me.

Once again I pass the night sleeplessly
This repetition is almost military
They crack their whip and I attempt rebellion
Unable to keep me in the line they have me running laps
Chasing me, feigning amusement with cheers of excitement
But I know I tire them as much as they taunt me
These mindless shadows never break from routine
Unable to forget, incapable to remember
They start their terrorizing each night with inhuman enthusiasm
Commenting on my actions and thoughts with shock and surprise
Do they not remember I have heard this all before?
The fear within me grows as each day starts and repeats
Fear that they will never tire, that I will never rest
But I can choose to forget
And in memory I remind myself this-
Though my mind grows weary in their communist regime
And there is yet a hero to overthrow their ghost king
I learn in repetition, and will continue every night
Maybe I will become worthy one day
And call all to revolution.

They stole it
And they're not giving it back
Like children they parade their toy for all to see
But selfishly keep it to themselves

They're tricksters
Fooling people to believe they share their stolen prize
Like the sandman they grace man and woman with fictional fantasies
But demand humanity in exchange.

They're parasites
Unable to find satisfaction in their timeless space
Like gluttons they lure craved emotions and feast
But never do they lose hunger.

They're killers
Deserting me here in loneliness unable to keep you near
Like poison they have ruined an ability man once mastered nobly
But in cruelty, they do not destroy it.

They're nothing
Envious of form, feeling and life that we once cherished
Like addicts they devote all of their nothingness to watch us
But they're too far to save.

They're not able to love
Bitter about my love for him they wage a war that I don't want to fight
Like vampires they try to drain me until I am one of them
But they will not succeed.

They stole it
And they're not giving it back
Like children they parade their toy for all to see
But selfishly keep it to themselves

They're tricksters
Fooling people to believe they share their stolen prize
Like the sandman they bestow fictional fantasies
But demand humanity in exchange.

They're parasites
Unable to find satisfaction in their timeless space
Like gluttons they lure craved emotions and feast
But never do they lose hunger.

They're killers
Deserting me here in loneliness unable to keep you near
Like poison they have ruined an ability man once mastered nobly
But in cruelty, they do not destroy it.

They're nothing
Envious of form, feeling and life that we once cherished
Like addicts they devote all of their nothingness to watch us
But they're too far to save.

They're not able to love
Bitter about my love for him they wage a war that I don't want to fight
Like vampires they try to drain me until I am one of them
But they will not succeed.

I've fooled myself all along
My written word, although genuine was manipulated
My honesty, used as a disguise for my trickery
Unknowingly I was becoming a prisoner of my mind.

I've been waiting all this time
My corpse like body silent and still
Boredom crept in, and impatience questioned
What am I waiting for.

I should know now that thoughts, however positive, have no effect
As momentary pleasures traps others
I had trapped myself in that prison with my own thoughts
I am good, I have good intentions.


Yes, my own mind had me cheated
I see now as I sit empty handed, rotting in my place
Empty hands, yes here are hands that can touch and hold
Time to stop thinking, use these hands and grab eternal pleasure.

The feminine voice finds many ways to my ear
It conceals its muffled words in droplets of water
Brushes against me while in tow of unknowing winds
Shrieking whispers invade my solitude
Masters of disguises invisible to young eyes.

I can never fall asleep as gently as I once could
Drifting into the safe havens has become a rough journey
Dreams have become a great escape rather than a warm embrace
Through battle they have my eyes hostage
By their command they unwillingly disallow rest.

As butterflies caught in a storm, my eyes flutter manically in their cage
In closed lids they pry and scratch in search of escape.
Never ceasing to stop looking they trap me in this limbo
Almost treacherously aiding the sexless voiced general
In his raiding my humanity for feelings to satisfy his troops hunger.

But they are disappointed more often than not
Self ruining feelings are all this soulless ghost army craves
A delicacy they tasted in me and fed on in greed
I am sorry, dear enemy, your momentary pleasure is over
This storage is running low from frequent raids of provoked panic and emotion.

This war has been long, and no longer appears a battle
More a dance well practiced, predictable every night
You have eaten all of what you desired, but fear not I have something left
Without catch nor trickery I give to you a message of kindness and savior-
It reads Your hunger will bring starvation
So let me sleep, or continue your attacks to your downfall.