there are so many holes in the sky tonight I wish I could crawl through one and drop into an infinite drop explore the nothing in the nothing freefalling has always felt natural to me I guess that's why it's so hard to orient myself with enough space for beliefs and doubts I look to the moon for guidance while it waxes and wanes it is always whole illuminated or not it is always present
She comes here, consumes nothing, offers all but what I desire. Folds my laundry, teaches me Thai, goes down on me. Massages my shoulders to tempt sleep in restless sheets.
But I cannot write a lullaby with her sleeping soundly, like a lie, by my side.
Long ago, Before the black ice of the North Began pouring down A great empire stretched From the primordial mountains To the the great foaming sea They thought themselves The masters of their world In that age where the gods Were rarely present Or accounted for But with the gods abandonment Came lost terrors Sealed since antiquity In the deep places of the earth
I'm not as good as the light suggests I prefer the dark where my shadows are invisible Where they can't follow me and watch me And show me my wrongs Show me I don't belong
There is no song that can make me feel better About what I've done The things I've seen, done, and wished I hadn't I've learnt from them, this poem is proof of that Once I put it in words it's as good as set in stone Because out of everything I've known Poetry is the only thing that feels like home
So please be a razor and shave away my sins like my hairs Like my hairs my sins are uncountable Shave them off and let them fall Allow me retribution Allow me freedom I have been beaten
I don't want to remain in this darkness anymore I want to yearn for the light and remember when my shadows walked WITH me and not against me When my shadow had pride enough in me to walk with me When my soul was as close to me as my jugular vein Please take away this pain Let not me be a bane in the rain of your mercy Let not me fail...