I told you I'm fine,
Even though I'm not,
I want to say it and talk,
But my breath just gets caught.
The lid is quite tight,
And I hold in a lot,
Want to pour it all out,
But don't think that I'll stop.
My thoughts are quite mangled,
Wrapped up in some knots,
And it's hard to unravel,
But I write it down & jot,
To unload all this weight,
Because it feels like I ought,
To release this inside,
And happiness I shall sought.

Who are you to tell me who I am?
You are human,
Just like everyone else on this planet,
You've got flaws, imperfections
And insecurities and habits.
And looking for approval and likes on your gadgets,
Trying to read between the lines and commas and brackets,
Seeing can you figure me out,
But you can't even hack it,
You wear your heart on your sleeve too,
It's just under your jacket,
So stop with the judgements,
And stop with this racket.

I was tired of trying,
And showing my kindness,
When all people did,
Was treat me like a virus.
They didn't appreciate,
What I gave out,
So I ended up hiding,
And covered my mouth.
I lost all my trust,
For everyone I would meet,
Even people I knew,
And some ones that I'd greet.
They thought that my kindness,
Meant that I was weak,
So I became anxious,
And wasn't able to speak.

I'm so tired,
But I can't sleep,
Refrain from gossip, because talk is cheap,
Words like poison, it drips from your fake smiley teeth,
If your nice guy attitude is a mask,
Then what's underneath?

I am walking a thin line between how I see myself,
And how others define,
I try to lift myself up,
But then I'm taken down,
I try to make myself smile,
But there's nothing but a frown.
Tik tok, the hours on the clock,
The seconds and minutes rushing by,
And in a blink of an eye, it's 3 o'clock again,
And I try to get myself out of bed... But I can't.
Even though I know everything I said,
About getting up late,
It shouldn't be a debate,
But I can see it on everyone's face... that they talk,
Staring, counting every second of my walk,
As I go to get a cup of tea,
And I wish that I was free,
From all of this anxiety,
Trapping me, taking control of my life,
Making me stay in my room,
Wallowing in utter doom,
Listening to music to pull me through.

The way things used to be,
Years ago when we were free,
What happened to our society?
Now mobile phones are glued to our hands,
Making quite a lot of demands,
Taking over starting to expand,
Like it's a whole other place,
Another land.
People are consumed by social media,
An unhealthy place is where it'll lead ya,
Picture perfect, flawless but fake,
How much of this can you really take?
Plump up your lips, and have a flat belly,
Don't eat sweets and don't eat jelly,
Be like Megan Fox who's with Machine Gun Kelly,
Be a model that's on the telly.
Have skinny legs and be 6 ft 2,
Only wear heels and don't wear shoes,
See yourself from our view,
Get botox til your face is blue.
Listening to your every word,
We know everything, we've got all the dirt,
Secretly listening to conversations,
Showing you clothes & makeup,
Testing your patience.
It makes you feel like how many followers you have or likes defines who you are,
If you have over 1000 followers, yeah you are a star,
But if you have only 7, oops sorry you didn't get far.
Number and likes don't define you,
Nobody has over 1000 friends,
Your value doesn't decrease based on numbers on social media,
You must be careful because sometimes it can try to mislead ya.

A tear falls from my eye,
Inside of it holds questions why,
Like why you treated me this way,
And acted like I'm the one who's not okay,
Or why I'm always pushed aside,
When I treat them nice & treat them kind,
Or why I'm always ghosted and rejected,
And why I'm hurt and disrespected,
Why I always seem to regret it,
Everything I try and do,
My kindness is taken for granted.
Why are you so cold?
Do you even weep?
And why don't you feel bad?
How can you even sleep?
As I wipe the tear from my cheek,
I'm not asking why anymore,
Because my worth isn't defined,
By someone who has hardly felt this low.