Will you join me?
There's a party on the moon,
A dancing of the stars,
One by one they call out,
Singing to the midnight light.

Everyone is invited to
The party on the moon,
Dreamers dreamt the decorations
Creating the scene for
The perfect dance hall.

So why don't you join me
At the party on the moon--
You can dance all night
And I might save a dance for you,
A dance at the party on the moon.

Some things are better left unsaid,
Unsure of what I did,
I hurried, ran, and from you hid,
And took a long road,
Knowing not where it lead.

I feel I'm there, without your lies,
When you took her hand, butterflies,
Then you kissed her lips and then her eyes,
I could feel my tattered heart
Breaking inside.

How could you feel the way I do
When all she wants to see is you
I see you here and then I go,
Staring blankly at my shoes.

I can't seem to find a love like yours.
I only find thistles and thorns.
The roses of paradise trampled by boars,
Without you caring, my heart is torn.

This is my postiche redemption,
An artificial avoidance of the only thing I know.
Heartbreak paints the tension of my soul,
And love is the heart's suicide goal.

We stop for nothing.
Fragile,
Breakable,
Torn into.
Unable to fall far enough,
Fast enough.
Run to catch up,
They are just too far ahead.
Stop.
Watch until wanting to run,
Again,
Unable to continue forward.

Why stop?

Sure.
You can do that.
Just a flower,
Small,
Insignificant.
It can't change the world,
You say.
So you can get away with it.
You can get away with
Stepping on it,
Pulling the petals off one
By one.
Just a flower.
Only a flower.
One out of
Millions.
What is one dinky flower
In comparison to the
Capability you have to give?

You can give,
You can take,
You can build,
You can break.
Just a flower.
Does a flower matter?
Beat it,
Break it.
Ignore the perfect imperfections,
Ignore the hurt you cause.
You say you will give back,
Some way some how,
So you don't mind,
It's only a flower.

The flower has one question:
What do you have to give?

Serenity.
Soft velvet that is not comparable.
Singing, a babbling brook.
Sweet music.

Calming.
Calamities haven't happened.
Caressing, a new potential.
Carry no burden.

Peaceful.
Pleasant and sweet reminder.
Pastries melting on your tongue.
Past is lost.

Dawning.
Drawing ever near.
Deliberately wishing.
Dancing to the music.

Living life on a slant.
 Things keep slipping
  Just out of reach,
   Looking like they are far,
    Too far to be here or there.
     Everything is unobtainable,
      People seem like they
       Plot against what you
        Want for them and for your life.
         Smiles seem crooked,
          Sidelong glances lengthen,
           And frowns look fake.
            Nothing is clear when
             The only perspective is
              Sideways.

Pounding through to the finish line,
You've finally made it through.
Not even close to last,
Right before number two.

This is the moment you were working for,
All the miles trod.
The trophy and the medal yours,
But who really won?

Was it the shoes, the miles, the clothes?
Or the stress, the drama, the despair?
Was rivalry what won?
No, these could never win.

What won were the smiles, the laughs,
The cheers, support, and popsicles,
A coach and team that love you,
Times spent working hard, and sacrifice.

So when you cross that finish line,
Remember the ones that won your win.
Reflect on all of your hard work,
And celebrate together, your gratitude within.

I smile.
I know I've seen you before.
Before this trouble started.
Before I wept in pain.
Before I saw you day-dreaming.
Long before we met.
I saw you,
I know you!

I remember it like
Clouded crystal,
Clearer in the remembering,
Than in the veiled details hidden anew.
You were there--
So was my prince.
The darker was upset,
Grieved because soon, too soon,
I would be away.
The lighter made a promise--
A promise he could keep.

I know you wouldn't remember,
I know you might forget now,
But you made a promise,
A promise to me,
A promise to him.
You will protect,
Treasure,
Honor.
You will be a light.
You will be my knight.
You will be my friend eternal.

Words are of no object,
Just like the past does not exist.
And the future
Is not foreseen.
Words have not object.

But to make the world alive,
Words are objects.
The past is reenacted,
The future is predicted.
But these are both lies
And both truths.
To exist is to be present,
To be in the world.
Words are present--
They disappear.
The past happens--
It is forgotten.
The future is coming--
But it always looms above our heads.

To make it exist--or not--
Is to choose your present carefully.
There is no gift exchange.
You-- and the universe-- depend on
    Words
    Pasts
    And
    Futures.

Bruised and broken
Yet still standing.
Throw one more punch,
You are on your knees again.
Taking a beating,
But still the fight goes on.

Fight for Truth.
Fight for Beauty.
Fight for Future.
The tormentor will lose;
Fight for You.

Just keep walking.
     Even when you can't feel your feet.
          Even though you feel you can't walk
               More.

Don't judge me.
You don't know my life, my circumstances,
My heartbreak.
It seems like people only care about
How they measure up to others.
They are disgraced by people who can't measure--
Disgraced by me.
But no one knows.
No one knows its me.

Sometimes I hate my name.
It happens when I hate my self.
Called out in shame,
No one had time to listen,
Time to hold me,
Time to care.

Do they know what they are doing?
Do they know the difference between put downs
And let downs?
Do they know that the pain they give me
Is worse than any physical pain I have endured?
If they do,
They don't care.
They live to measure;
I can't measure.

But,
How sweet it is
When I get called beautiful.
Who knew I could be beautiful?
Me, the blandest and saddest pretender in the world--
Beautiful?
I'm feeling of worth,
My world is changing.
What he says is worth all the heartbreak in the world.

I'll tell you what I thought about when I was gone and so alone,
Secrets with no one to tell--
Every action in this world has a consequence,
And I don't talk like an open book.

Don't tell anybody about the things we have planned
Or how you turned me around:
They just want to push us down,
But I will muster every ounce of confidence
To promise not to promise anymore.
I will take the chain from off the door:
It's not too late to apologize.
I went as far as I could,
I'm not afraid to fall, I might just learn to fly.
We learned so much about ourselves,
But did you know how much you moved me?

My world is not everything I hoped it would be.
It's a little bit scary;
I am lost for words.
I feel alone in the unknown,
All I want is to be in the light.
Please get me out of here,
Wash away all my tears,
Let me know that I'm not alone;
I am scared:
They are trying to figure out what I'm all about,
But it's not easy to be me--
I try my best.
You know I'd fall apart without you.

I want to see you be brave.
If you're still waiting for the breakdown,
I just hide it away--
Throw it away.
I feel like a problem girl,
And you are more than I deserve.

You want to know more about me?
It seems like there's always someone who disproves,
So I built a concrete wall.
Please be there through it all--
Everybody has a dark side.
Will you love me?
Will you love mine?
My hair looks dull,
My shoes are wrong,
They laugh at me,
I don't belong.

Don't it always seem to go
That you don't know what you got until it's gone?
I'm tired of hurting,
But I'm slowly learning that
Tomorrow may be one day too late.

Even the best fall down sometimes,
Even the wrong words seem to rhyme,
But when the time comes,
Don't run,
Set me free.
Here I stand,
Just the way I'm suppose to be,
But I'm going to make that change.

I will dance if you ask me to dance,
But right now I'm sitting here praying for reason.
You don't know a thing about me,
But I threw a wish in the well:
Be my escape--
I need someone who stands beside me,
Not in front of or behind me.
Please listen closely to everything I say,
Otherwise you will never know me.

My favorite dreams are those that are
Possible,
Yet so unlikely to ever happen.

Dreams can be a random mix of brain
Processing,
But sometimes truth is evident in dreams,
Only detected by God and the dreamer.

Holding hands for comfort,
Even in dreams,
Hands give strength and support,
As well as conformation of love.
I hope my "happily ever after"
Involves me holding hands for ever and ever,
With prince charming,
The man of my dreams.

I know he is out there:
I dreamt of him.

Have you realized how easy it is to lie about yourself?
Put on a mask and walk around.
You are the happiest person in the world,
Hurting inside,
Silently calling out.
Finally finding friendship
In the dark corners of your empty heart.
No matter what you think,
Everyone thinks you are alright
Because of the invisible mask on your face,
And the feelings you keep under lock and key
Never show.

Were you taking to me earlier?
I have so much to say
About what I'm feeling
And how I'm doing today.
You say its not me,
But I know that is a lie,
Its me,
Not you,
But I will try
To tell you the cold hard truth.
I feel like I'm left handed,
Spinning out of control,
Or like a sinking boat,
Not knowing which way is up or down,
When I look into your ocean eyes.

Sometimes the sea is in turmoil,
Maybe I'm the reason why,
But you're one of the reasons my
Light blue eyes cry.
I know you don't mean it,
But now I won't lie:
My own ocean cries because of the thing you said
And for what you will never say.

But you were the only one
Who held my boat up,
Who plugged the holes and dried the tears,
I hope you don't regret.
I still cry,
But not because of you.
People have always been disillusioned
When navigating my ocean.
They say things they would never utter
To another human being.
Your ocean held my boat,
The others mopped it up.

Spinning.
Faster,
Faster,
FASTER!
Fingers interlocked,
Arms touching,
Will you let go or I?

I smile at your smile.
Our feet step in time,
Oh so perfect time.
I don't let go,
Will you?

You wonder.
I wonder what you wonder.
If you asked me a question,
I will always say yes.
You don't let go.
I won't.

Spinning again,
Faster than before,
Gravity may tear us apart.
Will I let go or you?

We are all lost in the noise of someone else's mind.
No one can hear
Because the words are too strong,
Stinking in our ears and
Blocking the sound of true
Dawn.
Wishing,
Wanting,
Waiting.
Willing to wait
For the one who can hear us,
Even when we can't hear ourselves
For all the noise,
The noise that is in someone else's mind.

Just stop.
It's not your place to laugh or chide.
Stop now.
He may not realize what you are doing to him.
STOP IT!
He doesn't know, HE DOESN'T KNOW!
What do you know?
Does he go home and cry
About the stupid pranks and
Jokes you play?
Is it a joke?
It's not to him.
He is human and
He is worth more than you.
The jokes are worth less than one laugh,
But his life is worth eternity.

Remember that elementary game?
The one that you say you love someone,
Then avoid each other constantly?
Like how the sun and moon
Chase each other,
Yet never meet?
Let's play that game.
You can be the Sun;
I'll be the Moon.

The Moon envies the Sun:
He shines bright, giving life to all.
The Moon's beauty is dull,
Reflecting only what she captures
From the glory of the Sun.
On the night where he runs faster
Than she can chase him,
The Moon cries,
Lost in the darkness,
Haunted by the emptiness.

Does the Sun miss the moon
When she falls behind?
It's not noticed if he does:
He shines bright either way.

Sometimes
The Moon wonders,
"What would it be like
To be the Sun?"
All bright and glorious,
With many envying him.
Remember one time that
She stood out,
That she proved herself.
That never happened:
She was only ever the Moon.

She shines,
But in no way is that
Good enough.
She wants to be with the Sun,
To learn,
To grow,
Just like everyone else.

But when the Sun
And the Moon
Meet,
Everyone is silenced into
Terrible and terrific wonder.
Is it right to be together?
Is it good?
Is it safe?
Panic sets in the Moon,
And they part as soon as the
Moment came.
Does the Sun love the Moon as
The Moon adores the Sun?
Does the Sun
Ever Miss the moon?

The Moon will never know.

No one hears my voice.

Yes. I know.
Their ears hear and their eyes watch.
But they can't dig deeper than that.

My voice is quiet, insignificant, petite,
but my voice is strong.
And it wants to be heard.

My words don't come out right when I say them.
People twist out meanings that were never there.
They hear with ears,
but they don't listen with hearts.

I write.

The meaning is clear to see,
To understand you must look.
But to those people that take time,
My voice is heard.

No matter if there is anyone there,
These words are loud and call for change.
My voice is heard.
But not to those fools
Who slit the tongue and
Devour every good meaning
Of the voice inside of me,
leaving it dead, empty, quiet, insignificant, puny.

My voice is dead
When it is unwritten.
Yet no one really wants to take the time;
Read and listen.

No one hears my voice.

Could I be wonderful?
Amazing?
Beautiful?
I am invisible, except my mistakes.

I hurt.
I am invisible.

I hide behind a mask, masking my mistakes.
I mistakenly mask my mistakes,
Striving for something more,
I mask my invisibility.
But that is my mistake;
I should be invisible.

But people don't know what,
or why,
they do this.
Am I the only one?
The only person?

Others are invisible.
They mask their invisibilities.
They hide their mistakes.
They think they are the only person,
But that makes me the only one,
The one that realizes what
Terrible hurt there is in the world.
Who else knows?
I want to cry.

AM I THE ONLY ONE?

I am a rose with petals falling
As soft as velvet
While a boat rocks
Back and
Forth,
Swaying to an impossibly luscious, yet a silent song.

The petals fall,
Gliding into a neat pile,
Unused but sitting worn out,
As if they were just sent cascading,
Wishing luck at a party,
A wedding,
A funeral.
The petals shiver at the thought.
It was not a good idea to think that way now.
The wind caresses the petals
And carries them far,
Far from where they were drowning in memories.
They were no longer old and forgotten.

As the wind carries them along,
The petals listens to--
And adds to--
The silent song
That everyone listens to every day
Without hearing its sweet harmonies.
That is why it is silent--
Except to the rose.
But the melody is still soft
And wanting to fade away,
Just like the rose did,
Until the wind retrieved it from invisibility.
The wind twirls the rose and the petals dance to the silent music.

When the wind is gone,
The petals fall to the floor again:
Abandoned,
Invisible,
Forgotten.
But the silent music still plays and the invisible petals dream of dancing.

Here is what I shall do: love without knowing, trust without completely understanding, understand without judgment, try even when I know I will fall short, be ready to get back up before I fall, smile when there is nothing left to smile at, laugh when times are light, kneel when times are dark, find the little things called happiness, wonder at the world, say the words that need to be said, ask the questions that others avoid, be honest when the only option is to lie, forgive others when they hurt me more than they will ever know, be willing to listen to whoever needs to talk, give hugs to people that need help, make friends with people I will never meet again, sprinkle fairy dust on everything to make it sparkle, AND find joy in being myself because every moment is of worth.

Do you know what that
Life is like? That
Life that
The survivor that
Became is worth more than that
Who died? The life that
Living souls are worth more than that
Dead guy staring at you out of that
Pathetic history, that
History of survivors that
Had died so long ago that
Had somehow become more than that
Of real life? That
Somehow those people that
Didn't waste away that
Were brave enough that
Instead of pulling that
Trigger or enduring that
Pain were worth less than that
Old dead guy that
No one cares about now?

No, those that
Decided that
Their life was worth more than that
Heartache changed and that
Made them better. That
Made them see that
Their life of worth; that
Life, that
Living, that
Change is of worth. That
Made them worth more than that
Deemed genius that
Changed the world, that
Now lacks power that
Can fix the future that
The world will live in next.

These survivors have that
Which can save that
World that
They live in. They are waiting for that,
A feeling of worthiness that
Saves lives and spares futures, that
In turn colors that
Life of worth that
Everyone strives for. That
To strive for is to listen to that
Which needs to be said. That
Word spoken, that
Ear listening, that
Understanding is that
Which creates that
Survivor of that
World that
Is continuously becoming that
Place where that
Devil devours that
Good light.

That
You could be that
Survivor; that
You can change that
Your fate and that
Everyone's fate is that
Thread hanging from the ceiling that
Is about to snap, that
Others have that
Influence that
Ultimately decides if that
Thread will snap or not is that
Which is most believable. That
You could be the survivor is believable. That
Which is believable will always have that
Opposition and challenge. That
Is the way it is.