I miss your kisses,
And the sweet bliss we shared.
I remember when we we're free,
I still cannot dismiss these feelings, or stop reminiscing on our past.

We loved a little to soon,
And said the word to loosely,
That was simply our mistake, hopefully we learned.

I still dream of caressing your skin,
And how you beamed when I did so.

Such simple little things, sometimes mean the world.

I cannot get rid of this love,
You were my sweet little dove,
And I will not willingly let you go.

My angel, I know I'll will not be your only one,
But let me be your last little love.

My body is pale and chilled to the bone,
Everything I once was is long gone,
The light in my eyes have dulled slowly.

I no longer feel like the lively boy I once was,
Expressions of emotions seem so foreign.

Everything feels so hopeless,
I am unable to feel anything,
I am to far gone, to hollow inside to care.

I am a **** living inside the little boy they all once knew,
A criminal taking away all the things that allowed me to feel,
Now only the feeling of numb runs through my veins.

This is the outcome; all I have done to get better has just left me numb.

I can hear the drums still,
Understanding when to react and play the 'act',
Another day starting but I don't even notice.

I wonder sometimes if I'll every get better,
Maybe then everyone will return back to me?
But I silence those thoughts, and just through my sweater back on,
Its knitted with all the emotions I once was able to freely feel.

All there is left is this numb little boy,
In replace of the once brightest little star that was filled with such innocents.

Papa you don't seem to understand,
You no longer believe I am still that little boy you grew up,
Your own little man.

You think I have betrayed you,
You do not understand how I became the way I am,
So you lash out and blame everyone else but yourself.

I stand so brave when you through your abuse my way,
I still behave the same way,
But you let lies and rumors consume, never given a second thought.

Papa you no longer treat me the same,
No longer show me the love that came so naturally.

I cannot save you papa,
I am not going to be your mind controlled slave,
So be prepared to wave goodbye.

Papa remember that I will always love you,
And I hope you finally come to realize,
That I was not the one to betray you, that was all you.

I am not a canvas that can be repainted,
I cannot be molded up into something else.
I cannot and will not change just because you want me to.

Dear ones, you say you love me no matter what,
But sometimes those words you voice sound like lies,
Because every time you turn around and tell me I am not "normal",
And say I need help, and you think something is wrong with me, it hurts.

You think that I can become just like you,
That I can turn into something that is in your mind "ordinary."
That I am just a canvas that can be painted over and started anew.

You wish to blindfold me and make me blind to what's truly me,
You wish to be a sculptor that cuts and molds someone in your "perfect image."

I cannot be the happy child you wish for,
I cannot be the ordinary one you dream for,
I am now the wary child on the streets, that is to afraid to speak.

You do not love me, you can't love me, because I am not you.