There is no me without you;
You made that truth.
Broke me, changed me,
Put poison in my roots.
Pruning, trimming,
Tightening the noose.
All of those alterations for a version of you.
I hate myself now, you win.
I hate my mind, my body, my skin.
All that makes me, me.
But did you truly hate me?
Or did you hate the pieces that reminded you of Him?
You became obsessed and tried burning my rot, but it wasn't just me on the family plot.
Your fire scorched all the ones we love,
All because I bear his blood.
Or was it my reflection you despised,
A mirror of your own eyes?
I can sympathize;
I hate most parts of myself,
But that does not dignify the years I have cried, All because you couldn't love yourself.
The cracks in our foundation are all that is left,
You can do a factory reset,
But I remember all the poison you have said.
I remember all of the lies, the pain, and the Deafening silence while the blade was on my Skin.
But you never saw,
The hurt I held close to my heart,
Or the blood I couldn't keep within.
So please be patient with me while I heal,
For the wounds you inflicted run deeper than You know,
But I am a survivor and I will emerge stronger Than before.

Your presence is so loud
It irritates my skin.
Your breathing sends me seething
Only the thought of silence
Can make me whole again.
Silence,
Something so quiet,
No thoughts,
No voice,
No presence,
Just a sweet end.

You are too loud,
It's suffocating,
Crushing,
I can't breathe.
I must quiet my thoughts or they may hear me. Quiet your breathing,
Will you just leave me!

Finally static.
I prayed for silence,
I craved the silence,
And it came.
Being empty,
It is familiar,
It's unfeeling,
It is nothing.

There is a power in silence,
Words unsaid yet known,
Unspoken truths that bind us,
Grown.
And yet in your absence,
Amidst the silence,
I found my voice,
And it bloomed despite your violence.
A fragile flower,
Now,
A spirited defiance.

No more silence.

A silent promise,
Whispered low,
My love to you began to grow.
And yet stolen glances
Turned into lost chances,
Where did all that love go?
Do the pleading eyes
And desperate tries
Just fade away?
No.
But slowly the ember dies,
Aching for a glimpse
From your eyes,
Lost in a sea of forlorn despair.
And yet it never comes.
Soon,
That love grows dull,
And the sharp words
Bang in my skull,
Telling me you can
Never love me.
And in the mirror,
A stranger stares
Weak, pitiful,
A lifeless glare.
And yet,
Love foregoes the empty...
It's all that's there.
My silent promise to you is this:
Your ghost,
I will always bear.