My prettiest words,
my sincerest thoughts,
the deepest parts of my heart—
you had them all.

I had eyes only for you.
Now I’m blind.

I don’t know where I’m going,
but I know where I’ve been.
I touched your heart
for just a moment—
and I could breathe.

Now I’m blind,
hooked to a breathing machine.

☔️

Don’t forget me all at once
Let me slip away in pieces.

Lose my voice today,
Tomorrow, my laughter,
Then that flicker in my eyes.

Let my words fade like old songs,
Let my kindness dissolve in silence.

I want to fall from your memory
Like raindrops
Dripping from a soaked branch
Not like a lifeless corpse.

☔️

My name means pure
Untainted by immorality

That's far from true
If only people knew the truth

To each person
I am someone different

Broken pieces
The memories of my past

Open wounds
Bleeding flesh

My eyes tell a story
I've been through Hell & back

I want to break the chains
They hold my heart together

I am not okay
I fall apart when I'm alone

I feel numb
I feel everything

Emptiness washes over me
I'm drowning in tears

It's hard to breathe
My lungs are overflowing

I need a lifeline
Only I can save myself

Yeah I'm so funny for the stories I tell, but I lived my twenties thinking living was hell
Sure, now it's hilarious that my past was so **** wild but is it really?
I was just a child
I did what I needed to-
I stuck it out, I took my beatings and I tried not to pout, he was the path I chose and there was no way out.
I was seventeen living miles away and when I needed it most, my family never came.
We wonder now, why I stayed, all the things he did to me I should have felt betrayed.
Though he was my captor, he felt more like a savior and maybe thats why for so long-
I excused his behavior.
When no one else would help me, he would stand right there, yeah sometimes he would hurt me, but so did everyone else who cared.
I know now it wasn't love-
just possession and control,
but that 17 year old girl in me was always desperate to prove that wrong.