we the daughters of sliced sunbeams
and those who chase gales in between
the pasture gates and barbed fences behind
the silo--

who think there's nothing softer than the way
honey sounds drizzled on toast or daisy petals at the supermarket
the women of ferocious silences, standing before
dozens with trimmed smiles and deafening inner beauty

squeezing our fingers down barley stalks and sewing
the roots into our dresses, we've tried six ways to sunday
the rules, the book on being wanted, before realizing that anything
born out of self-indulgence wilts away
all the work we did to grow and plait our hair with vanilla,
dipped in sweet almond oil we had no idea
that pretending
could only get us
so


far.

she stood there on the side
blond curls bouncing with pride

Get it! Get it!
arms flung about announcing
pink shoes and blue jeans worn
with attitude of a more senior form

Get it! Get it!
before it’s too late
Get it! Get it!
the tide won’t wait

orange ball floating
being drawn in and out
as she stood there ordering
and starting to shout

a small group are playing
and arranging their roles
for a future life being
determined by personalities bold

Get it! Get it!
as blue shoes are soaked
in salty water and laughter provoked
all ends in happy joyfulness neat

but some are more happy
with their dry feet

I still feel you pushing away.
Say it to my face, because everything is lonely without a voice
I loved you to your face
Disrespect me and love me close
You have way too many names and I keep piling them on because I see you in everything.

I knew I lost you
When your behaviors different
As your calls became infrequent
I became indifferent to you
The words you uttered to me
Felt empty, the love you claimed
Felt forced and pained

I don't know why we keep playing...
These game of lies
I'm trying to figure out
Why we still stay...
Is it the promises we made?
I'd rather you walk away.

I knew I had lost you
When you distanced away
When you once told me "we're better off friends"
Then you came running
Talking about working things out with me
When I should have known
There's nothing to work on
*** the love you claim is empty
A mere fantasy you want to play out

I don't know why we keep playing...
This fantasy of love
I'm trying to figure out
Why I still stay...
I don't want to force you to the promises we made
I'd rather we just walk away