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Lizzie Matthias Aug 2019
So much room,
left alone.
Quiet place,
a little dome.

Can I stay way up there?
Away from all the trouble here?
I can find a way.
There’s always a way!

I built a rocket
to fly up high.
To reach the clouds,
further than the sky.

.
.
.

Glorious, it’s magnificent!
There’s so much beautiful life!
From slimy creatures, to fuzzy bow ties,
there’s just so much to see!

I met a man,
nearly twice my size.
He pat my shoulders and said,
ā€œYou worked so hard, you got a prize.ā€

We became good friends,
this man and I.
He never said his name,
Maybe it’s a gargle.

I took him on my ship,
he nearly didn’t fit.
I designed the door only for me,
but somehow he got in.

He showed me to his home.
It was stunning, to say the least.
A beautiful meadow on the horizon,
A pink river above me.

I tried to touch it,
but he took my wrist.
ā€œIt’s dangerous,
do not touch.ā€

There were no trees,
But surprisingly, I could breathe!
I took a deep breath,
And ran towards the flowers.

Again, the man stopped me.
ā€œNo!
They bite!
They feed off the young!ā€

ā€œI can’t do anything!
Why did you even bring me?!ā€
The man sighed.
ā€œTo show you the true horrors of your creation.ā€

.
.
.

That was months ago.
Now I live by myself
in my ***** little dungeon.
A ***** little dungeon in the vacuum of space.

My prize,
my creation.
Was it a figment
Of my imagination?

The man,
that ginormous man.
He told me good things,
very good things.

But...
He told me of what I made.
My creation was a killer.
I am a killer.

I can’t let this be the last of me.
But I’ve lost all hope...
He shows me one thing in this vast, open galaxy.
Suddenly, I’m homesick.

I want to fly back.
All I want is my family.
I chased my dreams
With no second thought.

Mother... how are you?
Is the cancers back?
I don’t want you to be dead...
That’s the last thing anyone deserves.

Father... what are you doing?
Do you have a third wife?
How is your second family?
Sorry you couldn’t live with me in Germany...

Anastasia... how’s your studies?
Are you finally a lawyer?
I hope your dreams became a reality.
You really deserve it, after everything.

Nicholas... are you crying?
Please don’t bottle it all up,
you have a family who loves you.
I’m sincerely sorry I left.

Nathaniel... where are you?
Did you leave to chase your dreams?
Did you start a family?
I sincerely hope you didn’t leave Mother alone...

My friends...
Evan, Matt, Emma, Arica, Five...
Eli, Ryland, Lillian, Cacey, Sami...
There was so much I wanted to say...

No,
Giving up is for the weak.
I can’t give up,
Not now, of all times...!

For the first time in months,
I get back up to the control panel.
I chuckle a bit,
and push some buttons.

Last time I was here,
I was running away.
Now,
I’m running back.

.
.
.

A sister planet to the last one,
the one that ended my dreams.
The other blew up.
Too many flowers.

It’s just as magnificent,
just as beautiful.
But now, I feel a sense of dread.
A sense of dread and fear.

I want to cry.
I know that just as beautiful as it is,
there’s an underlying danger to it.
I could die at any second.

As I step out of my ship,
a child runs toward me.
I retreat back into my ship, my heart beating.
That child terrified me.

I don’t want to go back out.
There’s too much, too much-
The child is knocking on my door.
Oh god, help me, please!

I feel like I’m drowning in a puddle of lava.
Simultaneously choking and burning,
I have no escape.
I have no way to get out.

A cool hand sets itself on my cheek.
I try to open my eyes, but I can’t.
I can’t snap myself out,
out of this reoccurring nightmarish dream.

Suddenly, I gasp.
I’m in my bed.
Surrounded by my purple walls and white decor...
I’m back home.

.
.
.

Outside, I hear a loud rumbling.
I drop all my things and run to a window.
I see a rocket
and a girl.

We make eye contact,
her eyes cold and calculating,
mine curious and wandering.
She points something at me...

and I find myself being judged by God himself.
honestly what the hell did i just write
Lizzie Matthias Aug 2019
fake girl,
fake face,
fake life,
fake place.

wish i was real.
wish i wasn’t fake.
wish i had a life.
wish i had a place in it.

childish to wish that way,
childish to show my face,
childish to live my life,
childish to find my place.

nevermind, the tales are sad.
nevermind, i don’t want a life.
nevermind, i think i’m fine.
nevermind- d o n ā€˜ t  p u l l  m e  i n.
Lizzie Matthias Aug 2019
Okay.
I am okay.
Been through some stuff but...
Okay!
Everyone’s gone through things,
Some not-so...
Good things.
But one day,
Even just for one day,
Everything
Will be okay.
Lizzie Matthias Aug 2019
messy room = cluttered brain
empty room = empty heart
Lizzie Matthias Aug 2019
there’s a time and place for everything
and i don’t know
when to keep my mouth
shut.
Lizzie Matthias Aug 2019
Thin fingers gracefully traced the neck,
Creating beautiful sounds in elegant patterns.
He speeds up,
Swiftly going from piano to fortissimo.

A pig interrupted from behind,
No, that was just a girl.
A girl squealing like a pig.
Couldn’t she just shut up?

The jejune girl known as Juliet was jumping up and down,
Her pink, floral dress bouncing up and down in non-existent wind.
She said something about her regional orchestra,
He grumbled a half-hearted congratulations.

He gently set the hairs of his bow back on his A-string,
but pressed down and pulled in frustration as two more voices interrupted him.
He knew who interrupted, and took a deep breath.

A thin, androgynous boy was smiling at the camera,
No doubt at Juliet.
Another boy was smirking,
A smirk that didn’t care.

Achilles laughed and asked what Roderich was working on.
On one hand, the Austrian was thrilled he asked.
On the other, he didn’t want him to ask.
So, he looked at his screen with a look of happiness, confusion and anger.

Hanna answered for him,
ā€œGolden Statues and Fallen Castles.
It sounds pretty good, but it’d sound better on harp.ā€
Roderich looked offended, as if someone took an ugly picture of him.

He tried to retort, but it fell on deaf ears.
The Faroese girl gasped and slammed her hands down.
Something fell. She cursed in Danish.
ā€œOne second!ā€ She sounded far away.

ā€œProbably knocked her mic down,ā€
Roderich thought, rolling his eyes.
Achilles wanted nothing more
Than to punch his forever disgusted face.

ā€œYou all know Apollo, some Greek god?ā€
Everyone nodded in various degrees of enthusiasm.
From an uninterested hum to a scream of excitement,
They gave her a signal to continue.

The Greek boy began to rant, cutting off Hanna.
ā€œOh my God,
A folk story said the ā€˜Harp of Apollo’ fell from Olympus.
That’s my all time favorite story, I think it’s very informative and interesting and i-ā€œ

ā€œThe Harp of Apolloā€
Roderich scoffed, interrupting him.
ā€œfell from Olympus?
Who found it and got it’s magic powers?ā€

The two Italians chuckled lightly,
but Hanna didn’t think it was funny.
ā€œThat’s actually what I was gonna say.ā€
Everyone shushed at her serious tone. Why was it so serious?

ā€œI have a challenge for you,
Find the Harp and get it back to Apollo.
Nobody has classes, right?ā€
She said the last word in a mock Austrian accent.

Unsurprisingly, Roderich rolled his eyes.
ā€œWhy? It’s not like it’s real.ā€
She shrugged and said it might be ā€œfunā€.
Who’s ever heard of fun?

An uncomfortable silence gave everyone time to think.
Eventually,
Achilles said goodnight.
He’d play.

Romano screamed something in Spanish,
away from the camera, thankfully.
He slammed his hand into the mouse
and logged off.

Juliet waved the two goodbye,
blowing them each a kiss.
Roderich flipped her off,
and she logged off.

Hanna sighed
and said nothing.
The two made brief eye contact,
and then logged off.
Leaving the Austrian alone with his viola.
i just got progressively less and less creative as i wrote lol, but it’s based off a story i wrote in sixth grade so :/
rereading this, the first stanza sounds like *** ****
Lizzie Matthias Aug 2019
ā€œi’ll think about it.ā€
which means i’ll think about it
and always decline.
oh what’s this? a haiku??
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