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Zero Nine Jul 2017
The new ghosts of old loss are coming 'round again.
They're wearing their adult size shoes in the young sun of mem'ry.
Never has there been such a sizzle. HOT. HOT.
Fingers. They put their fingers in the children.
Into the past and reach for damage.
The new ghosts of old ghosts
Want to get their fingers on my
Past, would you imagine that?
  Jul 2017 Zero Nine
George Andres
i'm afraid to touch you

hell, what am i gonna do?
if i unconsciously held you in my arms
and told you i loved you
for the longest time i held back
from touching you
god, what am i gonna do
if my fingertips suddenly traced your cheeks
and had my soul drawn
by your million galaxy eyes
heaven knows, what i could do
if i touched your hips and the back of your neck
and carressed your hair
tucked it behind your ears
demons living inside me
might devour your lips and enter your mouth
rummage your tongue and live inside you

i'm afraid to touch you

you weren't
you've always had your hand beside me
but i couldn't take the risk
what if it's just me?

i'm afraid to touch you

you're not worth-taking the risk
i've held my heart behind the bars of my ribs
for how much long i could possibly lead
a short time of euphoria is never a risk
i would be willing to take for a second of bliss
guess suffering wouldn't be called so
if having you all the time is all i could afford
that i'll be more than willing to hoard

i'm afraid to touch you

you have no idea
how i've been on my wit's end
you have no idea
how you were a huge tease
the sun rises
the sun sets
but the only thing constant
would be my feeling's change
it grows more each day
and wants you more like a prayer

you have no idea
why i would not embrace you
when all i wanted to do was to do so
every morning and evening of my life
you have no idea,
why i won't hold your hand back
when all i wanted to do was to show them
it was mine
or it could have been mine
you were wondering why i froze with your gaze
you have no idea
how my heart pumps deuce
how my veins expand

and you call me red
when all i feel was blue
the coldness of my feet
the winter in my hand
the constrictor in my lungs
you were wondering why i won't look at you
you have no idea
because i look when no one else does
because i look at you not the way others can see you

i wish i wasn't afraid to touch you
i wish i was selfish
when it comes to you
61817 sometimes i'm wondering who i wrote these poems for.-103117
it was still for you. the first poem and probably the last. 21418
Zero Nine Jul 2017
In the end it doesn't matter if I get my **** touched or my **** ******
Get permission to lip little kisses on your hip skin, kiss that ****
It turns out I can please myself, with my mouth, only the wall's help
Just playing around with rhythm and word order.
  Jul 2017 Zero Nine
Inkveined
I should hate you
I should want to destroy you
Like you destroyed me
I should want to **** you
One day at a time
Like you killed me
I should want to
Forget every moment
Every millisecond
Since our lives intertwined
But I don't hate you
But I don't want to destroy you
But I don't want to **** you
But I don't want to forget
I want to keep the scars
So that I can trace them
So that
Whenever it's tempting
To throw myself
At someone else's feet
Begging for affection
For love
I'll close my eyes
And quietly remember
Every time that I felt worthless
Every time that I felt ashamed
Just for being me
All because
I wasn't good enough
All because
Someone else was better
All because
You cared more about your future
Than about our present
And I will make sure
That you are the only one
Who gets to say
I slammed the door in her face
Shoved her aside
Kicked her away
And she let me.
In other words, old news-ancient. And it wasn't worth it. -from my archives-
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