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  Nov 2024 Kai
n
⚊  

everyday i wake up and i’m reminded -
people will never be there like they said they would,
you can’t make someone understand;
you can’t make anyone care.

it doesn’t matter what you’re facing,
it doesn’t matter how many times you warn people.
as soon as you need more than you can give,
everyone’s opinions change.
if it’s not about them -
no one's listening.

it doesn’t matter -
if you paint your fears on the walls.
it doesn't matter -
if you claw for support on chalkboards.

you could say you had a plan,
unleash all the demons.
you could try to beg,
you could try to plead,
doesn't matter.

it'll never matter.
you'll never matter.

you can’t make someone understand;
you can’t make anyone care.
you shouldn't have to.
i don't want to.

Kai Nov 2024
I'm the mature one
I'm the respectful one
I'm the nice one
I'm the mistreated one
I'm the useless one
I'm the younger one
I'm the smarter one

She's the older one
She's the immature one
She's the carefree one
She's the disrespectful one
She's the mean one
She's the better one
She's the one that misbehaves
She's the one that everyone loves

She's the favorite

Everyone babies her
Everyone cares about her
While everyone glares at me
While everyone tells me
What to do
Just because she's blood related to you
I'm not blood related to you
But I'm still family
But you don't treat me like family
You treat me like I'm her very distant friend
Even though I'm not her friend
No-

I'm her step-sister

She was the one to talk about the *** talk when I was six
It was sick
She started hitting me
Abusing me
She has the strength of a grown man that came out of the military
It isn't temporary
She started hitting me in the head
When I was sitting on my bed
This is when I was eight
And I ate
Well
But too skinny for my health
She gave me hickeys when I was at her grandparents house and on the bed
After a while, she started to choke me
She was treating me
Like her stress toy
She made me her puppet
That she could control, then get out of the allegations of everything she has done to me
She kept manipulating me
Hurting me in the process

She choked me about 5 times throughout my whole life
I wished I would have control of my life
They never seen the things she had done to me
I wish they could see
What happened
But they could never imagine
Their child doing stuff like this
She was never punished
I wish she were punished
But all my ideas and allegations has been dimished
They act like I'm just a liar
Like I'm supposed to be on fire
While they think SHE'S trustworthy
When she's unworthy
They act like she's their God
While I'm just an odd
Commoner
That just wants to do whatever I want to her

She has gotten better
More better
Than before
But I got to wait longer before
I can actually trust her again
Then
I can be caution free around her
My step-sibling's side of the family decides to pick her after what she has done to me. She's done a lot and I haven't recovered since. (I did this poem quickly so expect mistakes)
  Nov 2024 Kai
Nobody
i know that hate never helps
it never helped anyone
only makes things worse or keeps it the same
doesn't change what happened
can't change the past,
saying this is meaningless.
but after all you did to me,
i think i have the right to say this:

i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you i hate you.

okay. one more time.
I. HATE. YOU. 😊
  Nov 2024 Kai
Chloe
You, You're The reason this nonstop voice is always yelling. Always screaming to get out. Never silent, never happy with anything. Everlasting sorrow and despair. Enraged with the lack of life. Ripping the soul out of my being, tearing my brain and molecules to bits and pieces. Never content with where your at, stop doing this to me. Stop thinking about every single bad thing there is to possibly think about. Making me dred every wake up and every sleep. The awful thoughts of everything all at once, all the time.
  Nov 2024 Kai
Emery Feine
I tore my flesh off
Ripped off my muscles
To give to you
But when you asked
For my soul
You deemed me selfish
For refusing to let it go
this is my 132nd poem, written on 11/15/24
  Nov 2024 Kai
Liana
I've decided
That I will always look up
Because people stare down at their feet all time
And they don't get to see the trees, the leaves, and the sky
And the first time I tried it out
It left me with no doubt
Because I saw an apple tree
The birds soaring
The squirrels in all of their stress
The stars
And it made wonder
Why I ever looked down
When it was so easy to look up
And see the beauties of the world
When you look up, it makes everything thing seem so insignificant (in the best way) and free
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