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Yitkbel Feb 2016
On Dating Shows
By: Yue ****

It was the same kind of bidding affairs
Except, having little to none
The poorest of bidders
Gambled for the richest of prizes
Every factor monetary
Every monetary factor vital
Leaving no room for affections
Real Estates? Light up a few eager signs.
Automotive? Followed by some more.
Although only for the most luxury kinds.
And if there were cash, free to spend?
Then, yes, yes, yes.
Scream and cheer
Each and every hungry butcher!
Fighting for the fattest pieces of meat
But, comes the plain heart
with only love and compassion?
Only silence and darkness greet.
For when it comes to benefits
Who look for affections in a plate of beef.
Yitkbel Mar 2018
When your glass wall shatters
          I would walk barefoot on concrete
                     Basking in the pain
After feeling so numb
         Never been touched by a soul
                    So delicately caring
In all of its silent, indifferent, bare and transparent
                   Suffering
Yitkbel Sep 2019
Why hath man no capacity for peace
The stillwater of quiet ennui
Wasting away under the calm wind
Dreaming of unrest
Wishing for a storm under a clear sky
Full of stars

Why hath man so much capacity for suffering
Except when faced with the thought of it
Then it’s a gluttony of sweetness until
A renewed longing for hunger
Unexpressed for fear of
Absurdity

A garden is built, with constant amends
Chasing a never-changing perfection
Till no flower is to be touched
By thieves, children, bees, all likewise
Till it all withers away
To ash and dust
Truly, a visage of all the same
Grey, and indifferent to the sun

A ruin now a sight of comforting pleasure
Its ruddy rust a wizened smile of experience
Its scars now revered by flesh and soul
By winds, children, moss, and ivy, all likewise
The stones that still stand when all else fall
Will always be more loved than unharmed edifice

So
Why do we still fear any fall
That when it rises
Will have the momentum to rise
Above itself,
And perhaps even above all.
On Rise and Fall
By: Yitkbel Yue Xing ****
Monday, September 16, 2019
Reading an anthology of classic poetry at the moment to get some inspirations as I aspire to something more greater and more universal than what I have already written.
I was reading Percy Bysshe Shelley when I wrote this.
---
Sentient Dreams: My Poetry Anthology:
https://tiny.cc/sentientdreams

This is the manuscript to my amazon vanity press poetry anthology: "Sentient Dreams" that I have now decided to just share it here digitally. All of the poems have been published here on HP at certain points of time anyway.

Almost all of the poems are from October 2017-July 2019.
Please feel free to share! :)

I don't think I will be adding to this specific anthology in the future. (Except three more poems that will be updated later.)
Yitkbel Oct 2015
Our Naked Souls
Written by: Yue Xing Yitkbel ****
Friday, April 10, 2015

I like to lay beside warm bodies
Never too used to the cold
But my love is for naught
but a dream within a dream

I still want to be with you
Through the tulips and willow
But I don't know, don't know
If my memories still withhold
Within, within you

Because
You left me caressing the air
Breath what's not there through
Me and my naked soul
My naked soul
My naked soul

Swimming through the wind
I saw shadows but nothing to hold
I kept my memories of old
and a silent story to be told

But
Your absence stripped me bare
and left me in the cold
Me and my naked soul
My naked soul
My naked soul
I sat under the willow shade
Peeled at the pink rose
and thought of you
But nothing's clear

Since
You left me here
With another muddled affair
I can only feel
Us and our naked souls
Our naked souls
Our naked souls
Yitkbel Aug 2017
I have had my bones chipped away from me,
Have had my share of physical and emotional pain,
But those pain subsided in a week's reign,
Yet,
I am still here,
Crying over the loss of thee.
Yitkbel Oct 2019
Time in each realm is a ‘living entity’

The collective consciousness

Branching into streams for each being

Or rather, each SOUL



For it is TIME

The consciousness  

The awareness of change

Atrophy, ‘death’ and ultimately loss

That binds us to Envy, Fear, Grief

And

Even Desires for possession



What remains is the eternal

The everlasting

Love without loss

Hope without fear



In Etahphh, the entity of time

As cliche as it is, is

Literally a river

And the streams of consciousness

Literally streams



Perhaps

It would be far more interesting

For us explore the planet Tarphah

Where the whole realm itself

Is a gargantuan elastic fabric

And it is in itself

Time, space and

All of its living souls



Or the perpetual

Self-devouring serpent

Of the Twin Neutron Stars

Where time and all events

Are in eternal repetition



But those are for another day

For time is dying in Etahphh

The eight side diamond shaped

Sandy planet of golden palaces

And crystal blue

River of Time and

Streams of Consciousness
Chronothánatos
By: Yue Xing **** (Yitkbel)
Wednesday, May 29, 2019
--=
I wrote this quite spontaneously, and heavily influenced by Doctor Who and Fringe, if you're a fan of the two shows.
I composed the entire nine page poem in one day, and:

I have come to wanting to ‘disown’ this piece of narrative poetry. The poem is completely original of course, in some parts you can’t even find lines identical to it; it came to me in an uninterrupted stream of consciousness. I wrote it within one day, edited mere letters within it, left it alone, and was satisfied. But the ideas within it, or even the narrative structure, and the storyline is far from original. In fact, I could say, it is quite cliched. I was heavily, heavily influenced by what little science fiction, and popular astrophysics for the layman books I have read or watched: from  books by Stephen Hawkings to Kip Thorne, from HG Wells, to countless Doctor Who novels, and as for television and film, from Doctor Who itself, to Fringe, to even Interstellar. It troubles me to think the poem is merely the result of recycled ideas, for it is still thoroughly my creation, however unoriginal the core ideas and symbolisms within are. Like all that suffers from imposter syndrome, I have a deep rooted insecurity of being seen as a fraud, a mere thief of ideas. Thus, I must explain myself, explain all the thoughts that flowed through my mind when composing this piece of poetry:
(I am not a student of science, so please excuse the possible complete nonsense of this work, if it is not fit to be a science fiction poem, then please view it as a fantasy.)

Through thought experiments, before reading up on it, I have concluded that the illusion of time stems from the awareness of it, from our consciousness. Apparently St.Augustine was the first to ever question the entity of time, and resolve on time being of the mind and not of the physical. (https://plato.stanford.edu/entries/consciousness-temporal/)

Thus, the creation of the land in my poem of the river of time, river of conscious awareness of the passing and coming of change. Time is conscious awareness, as is birth, as is death. Therefore the river divides into streams of consciousness.

What is then core to the story of the death of time, is that, although the length of the circulation of time never changes; time, being a body of water, alters its viscosity. Time slows down, time freezes over, time stops, and time dies in a sense. (In my mind, this started as a metaphorically attempt to explain the differences in ages of human beings in the bible.)

When time mets its ultimate end, what comes of us?  Do we rejoice in eternity for the end of loss and sorrow? Or do we become the ghosts of ennui, ever away from true everlasting joy that must only exist beyond the threshold, unable to be reached without divine intervention.
Yitkbel Jul 2017
I live in your past, and you live in my future, that is why we will never meet, even though both of us are always in the present.
Yitkbel Dec 2019
An initial burst of all of life
Light and its lack thereof
Brilliant spheres clash and combine
A Titanomachy of the heavens

A man and his rib, serpent and fruits
Being and consciousness, in choosing
The poison one picked, its effects hereditary
Awareness was forever won, with death carried

To escape the great flood
Limps and torsos, ashes and dust
After time, baring the great black mud
Black as the Raven that returned, not

White as the dove that returned, to Noah
White as the east flag that bore a warning
A warning against the cunning snake
That will soon become Totem of the Dragon

As all hungry bodies search for a new land
A new land of great plenty and distinction
Four beings arrived on this new world of old
Of mountains and valleys, and ancient sea

Bore two lives that soon combined into me:
I was oft called in terror by the violet nights
And a white dove in azule trinket appeared
I even held the shedding snake in yesteryears

I held my gaze to the sky and felt ever close
To the wonders unseen, unsaid but promised
In silence and unmistakable feelings to me, till
I am safely grounded by the faraway unearthly

I was instilled with the desperation for greatness
But only ordinary quietness gave me any peace
Why, through all of creation did I arrive with
So unsteady and vague sense of mission

And why did I ever so gladly indulge and suffer
Through all of the joy, loneliness, and ailments
Just for this impractical soul to deeply dwell
Ceaseless upon a naive idealism of words

Still, I mustn't've passed by life, just to leave
Still, I mustn't've woken in life, just as a dream
I feel something brewing profoundly within
What and when, I know not of, but it will be

Perhaps I am not yet ready
But I am forever waiting
One day, I will reach the end of this shadow cave
And having accustomed to light already, I will see

Understand,
Without fear, and pain
Everything

Like the initial burst of all of life
Light and lack thereof, will combine
And become of one mind with me
The Perfect Circle of Being Complete
Perfect Circle of Life and Being
By: Yitkbel Yue Xing ****
Sunday, December 1, 2019 4:19PM
Yitkbel Nov 2017
I remain permanently unmoved
By the constant impermanence.
Yitkbel Sep 2017
Draw me with a pencil
Erase me when you leave

Color me with chalks
Wash me away when you leave

Hum me with a mindless tune
Forget me when you leave

Build me with dust and rain
Break me when you leave

But never ever leave
Because,
Without you, I'd rather cease to be.
Yitkbel Jul 2017
I live through the future in my mind, and the past in my presence. I am always out there, somewhere, but never here in the present.
Yitkbel Mar 2019
I believe that

Names can physically

Mold a being

Without human intentions

As accidental drops of ink

Muddies the water

Yours follow the opposite

And being true to its essence

You are indeed eternally ‘PURE’


Pure, in the winter lakes

Of your soft pensive eyes

Color of the earth, the dust of existing


Pure, in the crescent

Of your laughing eyes

Hiding no sorrow

Dragging me along with you

When it descends


Pure

In the ripples of your soul

As I felt every drop

Seen in your dazzling smile

Unseen, in the dreamer’s dream


And I, indeed a dreamer

The ‘MOON’, the ‘STARS’, and

‘A MYTHICAL JEWEL’

That radiates not

Within or without

Except under or carrying

Your light


If only I can be your moon

A source of comfort but

Only at your darkest

Never to steal your shine


Except

I am merely a solitary bird

In love with the spotless lofty sky


I may praise it

And lament in its silence

But I can never caress it

Possess it or even

Comfort it


So it shall be

For even a storm of the sweetest dreams

Might taint the purity of a cloudless night
Written on Feb 4.
Yitkbel Oct 2017
Everyday
From when I open my eyes
Till I bid adieu to the unwilling nights
I sit empty minded
And refresh

Old news
Refresh

Samething
Refresh

Silence
Refresh

Nothing ever changes
No one ever answers
Except the hollow fear
And knowing emptiness

Still,
I sit
And
Refresh.
Yitkbel Jul 2017
Sometimes I don't want to remember or be remembered.
Sometimes I just want to be traceless. Leaving no memory, no impression, no scar.
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