I was waiting for him on the escalator on one side of the road 
My Heart pumped at the highest rate when all at once realized abode.

Saw him looking generously dashing riding a scooter
He was wearing a white t-shirt and jeans and his hair were messy but modish.
And here I was standing in my usual tank top and jeans,
hair tied in a messy ponytail
just then He saw me, waved And parked his vehicle near my usual bus stop
I walked to his way with my bag full of books.


We sat on the bench and started random talks about everything except what we thought about.  
He then started using his phone and I was beginning to feel ignored. He on a spur of moment stopped and stared me and mentioned about our chats and phone calls
"How it started"
"How it became more Frank and comfortable"
"How good friends we became online but never met in real life" strange isn't it?

Then I told him I have to leave and the 'awkward silent moment' and he finally spoke "yeah"

We shook our hand and he refused to let me go
So I smiled and left his hand and eye contact and stood in the row

The bus started moving and I saw him standing there only, shrugging his shoulder and leaving that place.

That was my first and last with him or anyone!!

One more time raise your voice, my little girl
One more time hold the ***** hand approach you
One more time cut that tongue that gave you the names
One more time take the  avatar of empowered "Maha Kali"
One more time be UNSTOPPABLE

I used to play Holi
I remember when my mum painted my moustache in my sleep and I woke up laughing,
starting like this, ending with fun and tons of laughter and memories!!
Those days were good and stress-free!
Then with childhood, my affection for holy ended.

By the way happy Holi to all !!

Independence is a mirage
If We are watering a dried corsage.

Dead Flowers of color and caste
Eventually dividing us by its blast.

It seems mirage till we reach
And realize what we were seeing is not water but just sand.

Independence is a mirage
Until we stop the following Entourage.

Making our nation our priority
Give our motherland some authority

Then see the perfect change
Till then independence is a mirage

One day I sat down in my bathroom,
Might be because of the cold wall behind me
Or maybe because what I just saw in the mirror
"the new me".
I saw a deep skinny girl apparently me
The thinness of the neckline scared my soul,
The pale color covered my whole,
Lips were darkened,
Eyes were dull,
Face looked like almost dead,
That day I felt the most lethal fear of mine.
Commonly named as BODY SHAMING.

It's okay to feel sad
Trust me it's not that bad
It means you are healing
Because you started feeling.

It's okay to trace
fingers on your blister
It is evidence of your
strength that you foster.

It's okay to stand single
Being in the crowd can be a tingle
Hate from unknown hurts, its true,
But love from known can destroy you.

I kept my hands over my ears
the reason behind is my country's tears..

They keep saying
we live in a country where **** and ****** are meaning less
Debating on politics and religions are mandatory..

It breaks my heart to read or listen words like this for my nation
But the problem is not my country but our thinking, perception, unity and Emotion..

Hashtags like #notmyindia have to be #iamnothatindian
Cause each one of us can dominate our motherland being politician or comedian.

That moment I just felt life is temptation
It starts..
My erosion of self

That moment I shed my tears in front of everyone..
And hope to find a hand over my shoulder of someone..

I felt like a flower which covered with snow.
struggling inside but externally it glow.

You met me once and left me for your laws
I started digging myself for my unknown flaws..
‎
That moment I just felt life is temptation
It starts..
My erosion of self

I kept sneezing today
So someone asked "what happen"

"I am allergic to something"

"What"

#i guess it's the love, in the air"

#happyvalentinesday
©yukti

I am walking in the hot summer wind
But I am shaking because the flowing tears were chilled.

My heart is running fast
And my head is aghast.

Hands are not free but held in the tight fist
I am afraid of seeing my bleeding wrist.

I feel someone's hand on my forehead
“Wake up sweety it was just a bad dream.”

My head is covered with sweat
But the firm hand of my mum abet.

In The battle with inner me
Days after days she wins
but
Today is the golden day cause I win..

Agreed that the darkest place is always under the burning lamp.

but, the jubilant feeling one gets by burning
his own self to give away the light is peerless!
©yukti

Come on all my common to important ones, get up the time is ripe
My crowned head tears are needed to wipe.

the time is ripe It's the time of Abendrot.
It can be wielded cause Sun is not set yet.

The sun of humanity,
the sky of dignity,
But the sunset is not so far.


Seated in the empty room andJust watching the hours tick by tick tock! tick tock!
This is not why we all are born by the almighty for.

I am your motherland, I always used to  remember my martyr spunky warriors,
That time I saw pain all over because of the foreign attack but deep in heart I felt saved cause my son is there as a barrier.

But my pulse has frozen when I see no Patriotism nowadays.
Ok Not for me but for your real and loved ones
get up, the time is already ripe!

what if I stopped believing in you ??

All your blessings will turn into a curse.
All your sympathy will make me worse.

What if You mold my heart of glass accordingly,

All my life I will remain coward.
All my self-love will be shattered.


What if I will be happy seeing you leaving

All our love will be till the dawn.
All our special bond will be broken down..

What if you would be the toxic water poured over a flower like me.

Like a bird he flies
to achieve his desire
high in the sky.

I stayed stand on the
Ground,
Keeping his desires in my heart!

I remained silent
somewhere I had feelings for you
deep inside I know you had someone else
and I being introvert and living in a shell.
Anyway, I remained silent!

you know that I have never stopped talking
I just stopped texting you first
and there was a reason because
I felt I was knocking on a wrong door.
Anyway, I remained silent!

©yukti

I am a flower without petal desires for the aroma

But he is fragrance paved in a bottle

We both are incomplete without each other.

While I lay quiet still in the dark
Ashes of my cigarette
Spread all around in the ground


While I lay quiet still in the dark
I think that maybe I am that touch
Of wind that destroys the castle of cards.



While I lay quiet still in the dark
Eyes closed and slowly sipping wine
With fingers moving on the rim of the glass.

©yukti

The only tiny wish I said every time
I blew a dandelion
I lightened up a candle
I prayed in front of God
I threw a coin in flowing water

      is that I may not be a part of someone's happy moment.
But dear almighty give me that much strength to be a primer in someone's dark instant!!

I love when you just cross me with a dagger of a glare,
our eyes finally meet
but then the thought of the gloomy world
who never lets us meet forces me to turn myself!

All those wounds make my heart porous,
Day by day all feelings are leaking through it.

But today the last drop of emotion left my heart for nothing but to make it hollow!!

I sat on the window in my room
Saw,
the heavy gusts force the very last leaf of autumn to fall.

I was watching it thinking my life is same as the last leaf,

We both  took it all so silently,
"Each action hurt me like a crushed glass piece all over my hand.
And for that leaf, each action force her to end her life."
We both have wounds not with red blood or scratches but with transparent tears and lifeless soul.

But somehow I had hopes cause the last leaf hasn't fallen yet.

As the time passes, I began to sulk in the crowd,
I started feeling like a cloud keeping storms within me.

And one day I wake up and saw the last leaf of the autumn finally fall.

I know it was not your mistake that I misunderstood your palsy-walsy as love.
It was not your mistake we met once but got attached very soon.
It was not your mistake I thought I am special for you, cause you were same for everyone.
It wasn't your mistake at all.

It was all mine!

I want to run away.
No, not with you
Ah! not with you
But away from all of you.

I want to run away
In this heavy rain
What I will gain
Is this only pain.


I want to run away
From all these lies
Before the time flies
Away in the skies.


I want to run away
To the way of the spark
Away from all the dark
To create a new benchmark.

Someone has stolen my food,
Which I saved and made for my soul.

My soul is starving,
And the mind is crying.

I suddenly started asking for help,
I fell on the floor and yelp.

My soul is dying for the food
And I started feeling guilty for being so rude.


The stolen food was not fruits, vegetables or ice creams,
But they were my wishes desires and dreams.

है परवर्दीगार मुझे फकत सुकून की दो गज जमीन अता फरमा

भटकते हुए बीती जिंदगी , एक पवित्र रोशनी दिखी जैसे तेरा इशारा हो
पड़ा , जीया, दौलत कमाई पर लगा जैसे फिजूल जीवन गुजरा हो

सेवा की, सहारा दिया , अमीरों के साथ बड़ा वक्त जिया
फिर भी दिल ने बेचेनी का कड़वा घुट हर पल पिया

थक कर एक दिन तेरे दर पर लेने जवाब आई
बिछा आसन श्रद्धा से तेरे चरणों मे आँखे बिछाई

महसूस किया कि पा ,ली थी दो गज जमीन जँहा मैं बैठी थी
वो सुकून की परछाई तेरे शरण में रहती थी

I have been wearing the ocean all-day
With the salty water of denied piled up thoughts, unsaid words and unexpressed emotions, painful yet invisible wounds, and endless but dried tears.
I am thrilled about the feeling when the power of this misery will turn these massive tides into a tsunami, ends up everything which is left of me.

If I were to punch you
I would punch your heart straight not akin you did  because your wound will surely meliorate!!

You held my hand Before I stepped on the stage..
We took a few steps together..
While climbing the stairs of the stage you lightly tightened the grip and suddenly left.
Made a hand gesture and showed me the way, I had to walk alone..
You showed me a thumbs up and tried to encourage me..
And while holding the mic I smiled and realized that my imagination power is fabulous!!

.................................
You and I are like,
Red lipstick and a girl's lips.
A piece of lime and tequila's nips..

Cup of coffee and "The fault in our stars".
A candlelight dinner and you with a guitar.

Dried soil and the first drop of rain.
Morning tea with Rainbow and dinner with  Fountain..

full moon night and desert sand.
‎you and I are like a strand♥♥

The fate made us Cry Everyday!!

So Cry
             but not even in front of Mirror!
Cry out loud..
             but your screams should be silent!
Cry as much as You can,
            but your face should always be filled with Smile!! :)

My Pen is filled
with ink and feeling,
It helps me to pour
my heart & helps me in Healing.



My heart skips a beat
when the thought came
in my mind like whine,
what if it denied to drop a line.
©Yukti

Yes they are sad and perhaps they make people sad too

Few say stay away from negative people, their influence is a curse

Yeah they are like blade they cut flesh and create wounds

Yeah, their talking is alike saltwater on that nasty wound.

If they pour their heart out, they are attention seekers
They are a failure because they can't help themselves from drowning in their own mind.


But are these people different from me and you?

Sometimes all I want to hear is
Move on baby, we will back you up.

Sometimes all I want to know is
You are here being a rock to cover me up

sometimes all I want to be recalled is
stick around for the rainbow to come after the painful rain.

Sometimes all I want to have a sleep
It can be in bed with roses or a well-decorated coffin.
©yukti

Look in the ashes,
there is a hidden spark  somewhere,

Now look into my eyes,
what you see is only COLD DUST!!

Just tell me who I am to you

Not like a heap of words
But just an epitome

This would be enough,
For me to live.

Just before you are leaving,
Your voice for the last time.

Not like a song with violin
But just a ditty!

This would be enough.

So when it gets cold and dark remember,
There can be light and heat by Ember.

Stand and lighten the fireplace,
And let dark memories to erase.

Sit ,have a tea ,this is the moment gou  needs to cherish,
This is the place where you can see yourself flourish.

Sometimes shadow can
be your best friend,
When the sun shines
and hinders your vision,
shadow is the only one
who stands with you!

Taking my hand, gripping it firmly
make your heart lead me to the moon.
Take me with you in each step having never-ending talks..
More like "You speak I listen"
Or like talks that make less sense

Take me to the moon..


Watching the blurred world clear without our spectacles
is not only what i desire
but also to dance without any music
or you to read my unsaid thoughts
so take me to the moon.

Not only the beautiful dawn while living under the same sky
but also the star and earth
so take me to the moon


Your tiny gesture and small soft nature towards me
Makes my world a fairy tale in few seconds
To change my reality into a fairy tale

Take me to the moon..
©Yukti

No no do not take off the mask
I know to wear it all day is a big task
But my little lamb you are still someone's vision.

You can't let anyone know the inner turmoil
so Breath normally.
You can't let anyone know  the reality
so smile lightly.
You can't let anyone know the broken self-confidence
So Do not make eye contact with anyone.

You can't let anyone see your swelled up eyes
So put your shades over your eyes.

You can't let anyone notice  your self-harm
So Unfold sleeves to cover your cuts and bruises.

Now finally
Take off the mask now you are under your roof.
I know you put it for no other reason but to make people goof!

Take off the mask which you put before facing the world.
This mask you put acts as a shield against the hurled!

The world never accepts the bitter truth that everyone has to put a mask
over their reality to survive under this fake planetary!!

We remember the pain but not the happiness.

We remember the results but not the struggle behind that.

We remember the worst but not the best moment.

We remember the adulthood but not the puerility!!

The heaviness you are feeling inside your chest everyday

Is it because of you are swaying on water
Or is because of the water you are holding under your specs.
The weight of water.

I never understood the unsaid words.
I slipped while walking on the street and laughed like a fool.
I talked with myself more than people around me.
I made everyone laugh on my silly jokes
And let them believe I am very funny and happy.
That's what I am

feeling hiraeth in me,
having a battle every day for
living in a world where I don't belong,
Life was never as easy as they told,
As the first ray of sun
Touches the earth,
The battle begins
Daily we meant to be covered
In another layer of expectations
Molded by the pressure of society
To be the "perfect piece of art"
All the chaos of competition, force us to be
In our comfort zone,
The feeling hiraeth in me,
having a battle every day!