Inject me,
Pierce the skin
And it let it merge
With blood cells and
Bacardi,
Press your lips against mine
And slip the pill onto my tongue,
Don't pull away until each grain
dissolves
Stacks of cash
From selling love in bottles,
Capsules,
IV drips,
Losing our minds as we
Become entangled in unconsciousness.

But when I wake up you're gone.
Sweaty palms,
Goosebumps,
The fear of relinquishing control,
Or even losing my mind?
We become addicted to the visions
In our head,
The dreams we steal from dark corners
Of the brain
When we are intoxicated,
Yet with each passing of time
We rely on what numbs the pain
Of what we lost.

I spent the last year digging with two other people,
I thought we were building a tunnel,
To carry us from one side of the earth to the other,
A magical place, unlike anything that's been done before.
All the while I was digging,
You both were standing at the top,
Waiting for the right time to bury me.

I'd like you to know that you can try your best to bury me alive,
But watch how many people you cover in dirt,
You one day will be down here with us,
And on that day,
I wouldn't want to be you.

I don't show weakness,
Others come first.
I cannot falter,
Others come first.
When I am weak and weary,
I push on.
When I am sick and frail,
I carry on.
I refuse to acknowledge my humanity,
Because others come first.

We don't have a love like the rest
I compare it to Anastasia and Christian
You are so cold and dark inside
You can't provide love in my life
You can't save me from the demons in my mind
But I love the way you feel inside.

It's hard pretending I do not care
I wouldn't have it any other way
The way your thrusting inside me
Pulling my hair, and I scream.

Down on my knees looking up at you
This is what we have to offer
A secret life of ***, and I can't be your lover
But the way you grab me, pulls me away
You can take all you want
Just stay,  my fifty shades.