Rejection seems to kick in from Left Right Centre.
My heart is aching.
But I want to TRUST the Process.

I have seeked the face of God through this, asking why
The pain is much
Its hard to breathe now
The memories are making it even more difficult for me.
But I want to TRUST the Process.

I just pray for sanity.
For Peace and Joy to feel my life.
For the purpose for all these aches to finally be revealed to me.
For I choose to TRUST the Process.

So I try to breath.
Look to the skies and in silence feel the calmness
I will be still, and at the end I will win
I will TRUST the Process.

What do you want?

I was not born in to this world
to fix your mistakes.
I am not your second chance and hope.
I am me;
and me makes mistakes worth the pain
worth the chat and the laughter.

I am not you and
you are not certainly me.

I won't, however, make your mistakes.

I'll read to my child and tell them it's okay
to fall out of line
to fall out of order
to drown in the pragmatic questions
and breathe the pathological questions.

I'll tell them I love them
that they are not me
and I'm not certainly them.
That asking is knowing
and knowing is listening.
That been wrong is a matter of vocalization
and right is just a one route suicide nation.

I'll tell them right
without doing them wrong.
Take your pick
anything goes.

I want me.
Me might be wrong.

Not long ago, I dreamed I was swimming in the most beautiful water I have ever seen. It was a crystalline, pastel tangerine which was the product of the reflecting sun. It was too clear that it felt like air. I was underneath, swimming in its deepness and yet almost teasing the surface with the underwater ripples of my moving legs and hands.
There were iridescent green trees protruding from the side of the pool rooted barely to the edges of the patches of earth at the sides. Almost glowing from within with a light of their own. They were big and its leaves were plentiful. Evergreen, full of richness and budding inside this water world.
I felt content. At one point I was swimming with my head towards the surface but I was still submerged and the caramel rays of the sun caressed my body and filled me with euphoria.
I was floating underneath further and further mesmerized by the beauty and serenity.
I saw myself from somewhere above as I enjoyed the sensation of the embrace of the water and swam immersed in mirth.
It felt like swimming in my aspirations and inspirations. The softer side of imagination.