I breathe you like air

I often look at people and wonder
where they are going to end up.

I often look in mirror and see me going
as far as it's glass will allow me to see.

Death by elephant:
they said I tasted
just like chicken.

She's dark, yet
moonlight glows
inside her soft-eyes
& despite her
tragic-aura,
I still want
her blackness,
to taste her magic,
to kiss
the devil inside her.

I no longer wake up in the morning longing for your touch
or wishing I could see the tired look in your eyes
as we rush to a class we don't care about
I don't search your stupid youtube videos anymore when I am lonely
When I am lonely
I often have to remind myself it is better to be alone
I unfollowed you on instagram
but I still keep tabs on your pictures
not because I miss you
but because I often have to remind myself where this bitterness comes from
why my chest is ice cold
why I am angry at geography
why
I no longer dream of you every third night
but you flutter on the inside of my eyelids
before I fade into darkness
I no longer dream of you every third night
because I no longer dream
There is only darkness
until I awake
where I do not even wish for light
because then I would see what I am missing when my day begins

Bridge of nails
Wrists of fate
Sending time
Back to surrogates
Leave for nothing
Meant to bes
-take to beds
Healing time
And I am waiting
Hidden in vagrancy
Hiding patience in me
Alone in a snow storm