I was born in the wrong era, they say, but my daydreams are filled with a decade I crave.
Rocket fins and martini moons,
Vinyl songs filling pastel rooms.

I ache for a future never had,
Where the sold utopian from magazine ads
Bubble helmets and atomic rings,
Hope stitched in all suburban things.

Anemoia takes me there, like lovers meeting in midair.
Where housewives dressed up wearing lipstick smiles, oh what I'd give to stay there awhile.

I long for a time I never knew,
To have a retro love with a space age view.
So dress me up in future past,
Where promises were made to last.

And even if they crack with time
Let me pretend for a moment it was mine.
Take me back Where heart beat to a sci-fi tune
And tomorrow glows under a paper moon.

I want you.
I want your pain,
Your scars,
Your tears,
Your anger,
Your sadness.
I want your smiles.
your laughter,
Your happiness
And your love.

I want you.

Give me you broken pieces;
I’ll do my best to mend them.
Give me your pain,
And I’ll do everything,
Within my power,
To bare it myself,
If no longer you’ll suffer.
Give me your doubt,
So I can take its weight,
From the wrongful place
Of your shoulders.
Let me set them on mine,
So you’ll always be
Strong.

This is what I think
Love
Is.
Not just accepting every flaw,
But needing to behold the sight
That someone so perfect,
So beautiful,
Bleeds the same as us born
Ordinary.
That someone so pure,
Is able to exist
With us,
In a broken world,
Of broken people.
We long to rid them,
of their pain and scars,
Only so they never
Stop
Glowing.
For they are our light.
The ones who keeps us going,
When our fire
Flickers
Out.

The sky is absolutely wrong-
Clouds just never look like that.
The tumbled shapes are so not right.
There is a norm for tumbled clouds,
But this sky isn’t even close.
The shadows on their bottoms also are not right-
That’s just not how the sky should ever be.

And…Oh My God !….Is that a rainbow?

But rainbows are supposed to look
Like horse-shoes planted upside down
With one end hiding a *** of gold-
Always, always, always…
That’s the way a rainbow works.
This one is a glowing orb
Shining on the tip end of a shaggy cloud.
It has all the colors it should have
And in their proper rainbow order but
It doesn’t have the requisite two ends.
It shimmers into disappearing edges
In the middle of the tea-time sky.

No chance of any *** of gold
From a rainbow never touching ground.

It’s absolutely wrong to be there
In the middle of those misshaped clouds.
Raising questions that have no answers.
Is this the sign that the Bible promised
To welcome in the final days…
And tribulation for a thousand years
When judgement comes to everyone
And all the hens come home to roost.
The world below, in utter chaos mired
Must somehow look above the trees
To see the Portents in the sky.
             ljm

The curtain now has fully closed-
So why am I still on this stage
Declaiming words I never wrote.

Why am I in fancy costume, with
Heavy makeup on my face
To hide the wrinkles of my failings
And paint me as a thespian.

Cast in a play they say I’ve written
With a pen that's never touched my hand
And a last act that I’ve never seen.

I haven’t learned the blocking yet,
So I don’t know which way to move
Or which door I should exit through
And what will be my final lines.

As lights go down from the Interval
The audience regains their seats
To watch me in the final scene.
  ^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^
It’s over so I bow to scant applause
And no one comes to hand me flowers.
I stumble as the lights go slowly out,
And make my way from memory
To my dressing room down a dusty hall
Where I will take this garish makeup off
And walk home as the girl I really am.
                        ljm

I used to think love was when someone gave you a warm tingly feeling,
If cherry chap-stick erupted into an emotion,
If cotton candy could bleed.

Now I know that love is heavy.
Love is heavy and sweet, with occasional bitter layers in between; love has a mouth on it.
Love will keep you in line.
Love will blur the lines entirely but still expect you to remain inside
them.
When you feel love, you become drenched in it, you are simply sopping wet with irrational decisions spawned out of love.
It is a weight I will gladly carry.
I will walk into the ocean with no stopping in sight carrying armfuls of love.

The words I seek lie beneath
Row on row of ground down teeth
Separating flesh from bone
Burdens carried long from home
Letters strung on golden thread
Woven from heart, leading to head
When will all the words unsaid
Return from rapture; nothing left to dread

I don't rage
against the dying
of the light
instead
I walk gently
into that good night

for
life I've lived
in both wrong
and right-
thousands of scenes
have I felt
and passed
before my sight

rage is a sign
of non-acceptance
a sense of loss
and plight

I've loved
I've suffered
I've sung
I've danced
I've risen
I've fallen
I've wept
I've sighed

but still
I'm unbroken
though
the harshest
life has spoken
in many a blight

so tender
so comforting
so soothing
is tonight

life
is the alternation
of the dark
and the light
the mounting on
and stepping aside

I've no rage
nor regret
I've no fright
my footsteps
are firm and sure
as I alone walk
into the this
long, good night.

In every room
I've lived in,
all the dilapidated shacks
over the years that I've
stayed in, always had a
brown spider that crawled
the walls.
It had a little suitcase.

I thought to myself that it
planned on leaving, moving to
someplace better.
It never did.
It always just set up shop, and
spun a web in the corner and caught
flies, and occasionally a small moth.

On drunken sad moon nights,
I sang dirges to the trapped bugs.
They smiled and laughed, even though
they were dying.