Them that score goals
Don't generally
Write songs
And if they do it's
Not often that great
And have you seen them songwriters
Upon the sacred field?
They at least
A couple o seconds
Too late.

Lawrence Hall
[email protected]
Dispatches for the Colonial Office

                                         She Walks Between Worlds

                                             Stage 2 Alzheimer’s

She walked into our house for lunch today
The puppy gamboled at her feet in welcome
And was treated to doggie-kisses and doggie-hugs
She loves the dog
                                    She is no longer sure about us

Lawrence Hall
[email protected]
Dispatches for the Colonial Office

                                      My Daughter at The Last Supper

And whilst they were at supper, Jesus took bread, and blessed, and broke: and gave to his disciples, and said: Take ye, and eat. This is my body…”

          -Saint Matthew 26:26-29, Douay-Rheims 1899 American
           Edition via Bible Gateway

And my daughter said unto our Lord,
“Excuse me…excuse me, Sir, but is this matzoh fresh?
Did you check the expiration date?
Is it really kosher?  Is it from a fair-trade source?”

Amen or oymen?

Judas has left the building.

I wonder if
the waves took you away
If the sparkling surface
knew what to say

I wonder if
you felt safer there
If in the palms of a god
your limbs tangled beyond repair

I wonder if
the roar of the waves
If the wind tearing past your silhouette
sang a devastating praise

I wonder if
you slept for hours
If it took minutes or days
for you to wilt fragile as a dead flower

I wonder if
every road leads to you at the edge of a cliff
If no laugh and no kiss
you could see as a gift

I wonder if
the ocean will always be blue
If the red wine you spilt
will stain it a bruised purple hue

I wonder if
a piece of you still exists
If I really see your face
your fingers wrapped around my wrists

I wonder if
the days are still passing
If I live in my mind
your memory haunting and harassing

I wonder if
we scattered in the wind
If we are shattered pieces
undone with cracked bones and skinned

I wonder if
my life can be worthy
when you were stolen away

Why can my life not end early?

Let my mind slumber and my body decay

The noise fades out, the world goes dim,
Like every edge has lost its rim.
Your arms around me, hushing the fight,
And turn the chaos into light.

The clocks all stop, the stars don’t move,
As if the moon has lost its groove.
The air hangs heavy, thick with grace,
While I dissolve in your embrace.

No yesterday, no "what comes next,"
Just hearts in tune, no need for text.
The past can drown, the future stalls;
In this moment, I have no need for time at all.

You smell like love that’s always near,
Like whispered vows I ache to hear.
And in your hug, I disappear...
For me its the only place that feels sincere.

So many colorful shards,
so many scattered books,
my Father left behind.

He connected the dots
with me, in space and time,
listening to the wind
when it was raining.

Absent and so close,
he used to say:
“Listen to what’s on the ground.
See what lifts us at night
when the birds go silent.”

He gave me more unrest,
he was the left hand
forced to write
with the right.

He believed in me
when the system
sent me away,
dismissed me.

He had hope
without medals,
standing steadfast
in the last row.

Now the body crumbles.
There is a memory
full of holes.
A counting echo—
he remembers,
he doesn’t,
it’s fine,
still hard
but his voice lives…

Time is blending
into a rusted chain
of events.
Tenderness,
resistance
to the falling apart
of departure.

He won’t come back.
He won’t recover.
The body is warm,
life doesn’t want to escape
the shrinking shell.

Sharp words cut helplessness.
Many nights still come
until the final return
to the embryonic state,
to point zero.

I am here,
into this deep night
being the witness to breath,
awake in the dark gentleness.

Please, call me to the place where my tomorrow was,
Where all my fears and failures were no where,
Where I laughed much and danced a whole lot,
Where we both were together, you and me, just everywhere!

Please call me to the place where snowfalls
Entirely reign in winter, and frost is.
Where rains and leaf-falls are in autumn fully
And wrap with spicy odour all as coverlid.

Please Call me to the place where I was loved!
And where I loved wholeheartedly, without “May not!” at all!
Please call me to the place where I was free!
I beg you, call me to my place! It's not for all