I spent so much time trying not to lose my mind
That I didn't even realize
When it finally happened
But here I am
Smoking the filter of a menthol
And crying in the driver's seat,
For a forty minute ride
To no where
Cause I can't sit still anymore

All of the friends who used to
Drink cheap beer
on the floor of my bedroom
Have people who'd cry
If they didn't come home tonight
My coworkers are
there for their children,
I'm just trying to make rent for one
And no one would know if I didn't come home tonight

No one would call if I drove forever
So why do I feel so tied
to this place?

A trash can full
Of fragmented sentences
Held between red margins
And blue lines,
They poured out all over your
Bedroom floor, with torn edges;
You'd say that
No combination of words
Ever conveyed
Your feelings right
On the first try;
So I guess that's why
The first time you said
"I love you"
You took it back three weeks
Later and said
"No I just need you"
And I guess that's why
The first time you said
"No I just need you",
You reminded me how thin the line
Between necessity and desire
Is an hour later
And I guess that's why
The first time you said
"I can't do this"
You did it anyway
Over and over
And over again
And I guess that's why
the first time you called to say
You missed me
You really meant
You were lonely;
You never got it right on the first try
But you were a perfectionist
And you hated to leave things unfinished
So, you took your time
Ripping me into a million
Fragmented sentences
And throwing more of me away
With every passing day
Until I was a pile of bones
Stitched together with nothing
Except your
Bed sheets
And a black V-neck
Sweater;
Hollowed out
And expressionless,
I never looked better;
Once I had nothing left
To throw away
You pinned me up
And left me hanging;
Hanging on
Your words
Like an animal in a cage,
Swallowing bits and pieces
Of your affection as
You'd occasionally
Toss some at my feet;
I've been tongue tied for three years
You've been spitting words down my neck
But I can hardly taste them anymore,
So when I melt
Into your arms
For an other night in a row
Just know
It was never enough