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I miss watching your words,
always carefully chosen,
light up my screen.

I miss your laugh,
the way it was slightly different,
when you were talking to me.

I miss your face,
always carefully controlled,
even when I knew you were itching to smile.

I miss you.
A reminder of an ex-lover?
An unstitched wound?
An uninvited guest?
An unbearable pain?

All the unanswered questions
haunt me now day and night.
On Autumn leaves and au-burn haze,
Running on wild and empty fields,
Soon the spring would come and bloom,
And when the roses burn ablaze,
But Now the fire has reached my room,
Where i could stare in unending gloom,
Soon i would burn in ashes so black,
Asking the flame what do i lack,
You are the flaw says the flame,
Nor to love ,Nor to tame,
Then only death is i wish and long,
As i am not a bird with a pretty song,
Nor to cage ,Nor to claim,
Only to burn on a burning stake,
If i stay ,If i stray;
Shall i be bound ,Shall i be caged
Either way is to burn away;
To breathe, to live is a mortal's pray,
Either way im bound to break,
I won't strive ,i won't thrive,
This time i'll burn alive.
                             __tsuki no ume.
you called me
disgusting
because I lost
ten pounds
said hurtful
things
and acted
like it shouldn't
bother me
I am
disgusting
Sunday flies in on a broomstick
ready to pick a fight
and I'm in the thick of it
getting pig sick of it
what the hell happened
last night?

There's mail for the present incumbent
known to be rather a dumb gent
he just sent for security
and they aim to get rid of me

they'll probably hit my ear

hah.
Can I stop making mistakes,
'Cause it's what makes me hate
myself....more and more.
I know it's in my nature, but
there's a creature
crawling inside my brain.
I want to hold myself,
scratching my skin to the bone.
Can I just vanish in dreams
and never return?
I am scared of everything.
The question always lingers:
What if I can't make it?
What if... I can't?
Pain, anxiety, emotions
You shan’t seek
Love in lust,
Just as you can’t draw
Nectar from a rose’s trust.

For desire is not love,

And all love is not desired.
Finally putting it in a poem
She curled up her fingers
In mine
Read my mind
My heart screamed
my sweet baby Caesar
orange fur flying around
deep grumbly purr
light green eyes
judgmental and cuddly
introverted and quiet
you were taken far too soon
we'll miss you buddy
my caesar salad
my gingersnap snickerdoodle
my chicken nugget
we love you Caesar
rest easy now
the pain you were in is gone
yesterday my cat's lungs collapsed and we had to put him down
The star lit night blurs
I say sweet dreams on a breath
Past the edge of fear
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