I find myself here
More times than I should.
The taste of nicotine stained on my tongue
The thirst for anything that will find me relief
Who am I really?
Because this sickness and madness takes over everything that I am
Sneaking up on me bit by bit, unnoticeable
Until it’s too late.
I’m so tired of fighting this.
The days I cannot make it to my bed
And the days that I feel nothing.
And everyday - the feeling of uncertainty.
The feeling of complete emptiness and loneliness.
The feeling that grips me up and rips out everything I thought I am.
The days I cannot recognize this person looking back at me.
This. Disease.
It is me.

What is mine & what is yours?
Agonized
Disturbed
And sore

A dissevered conscience
Another ambush from you
Or is this real?

Give me a few ******* minutes
I can subdue this
I can transcend you

The stars are falling
The moon is blacked
The sun is depressed
My heart is cracked

The world has stopped
The time is dour
No longer moving
Dreadful is every hour

Humanity is out of oxygen
The flowers are asleep
The terrain is shaken
Listening to the oceans weep

Ghost of mine
Please leave
Not to another soul
But to another universe
Drift off into the sky
Eventually too small for the naked eye
Leave me
Find another host to dwell on
Find another place to drown
I don't need you
Biting my lip
Clenching my teeth
Eventually trying to find a release
Leave me.
Let me be.

In my storm, I lost you.
I so strongly despised
How one could look past this darkness in my eyes
My heart filled with ice, my hands covered in blood
Looking around so lost
Swept away from the flood
No strength to hold on
The waves are too high
Searching for answers
I hold my hands together and scream at the sky

She looks, speaks, and desires to be free
Possessed, duranged, confused
This must be me?

Reckless, restless, so radiant
She is captivating
Deprecating and suffocating

The moon floods her eyes
The winds snuggle her thighs
The oceans kiss her cheeks
The clouds wrapping her physique

I’m stuck in here paralyzed
Demonized.. Yet mesmerized

By the woman who claims to be me