My pen does not write
The paper in front of me
Is horribly blank

Nothing comes to mind
Suffering from writer's block
It is frustrating

From pen to sharp knife
With blank canvas insulting
I slit my wrist twice

Write in red on white
Nothing legible even wrote
My life slips from me



*No more life to bleed
No more blank paper haunting
No more writer's block

Walking down the street alone at night
Was the first error you've made in a while
Reminding me of the good in life I could no longer have
Is the final mistake you will ever make

I’m sorry it had to be this way
But I just couldn’t let you slip through my grasp again

Tonight’s all about redemption
As I follow you from the shadows
Whistling your final lullaby beneath my breath

I see you peering over your shoulder
And quicken your step
But you’ll never be safe from my reach
Never be out of my line of site
You should just give up and give in to me

I’d love to make you feel uncomfortable
Just one last time in your life
I’d love to see you look at me
The way I look at you
Just one last time in your life

My idea of romance is bleeding you dry
The frailty of your neck just begs to be choked
The breathing of your breath just begs to be choked
The breathing of your breath just begs to become your last gasp
Your Chelsea smile just begs to be turned into a cadaver grin

The scenes that play in my psyche
Are visions of you and me
Dancing to your last lullaby

I’m taking you on our last date
And you’ll never be heard from again
I’m taking you to our favorite place
And you’ll never be heard from again

I keep hearing your voice pleading to stop
But my hands just won’t cease
Every piece of you must feel like I do
Every inch of you must be covered in bruises
Every inch of you must be painted black and blue

You never looked as beautiful to me as you do right now
Lying in a chalk outline

These star eclipsed ceiling nights
Delay departure of my daydreams
No consequences you concede
Winter’s darkness in the middle of autumn
Your diction speaks the genuineness of falsification
Delimited by vacant vessels
Saviors always salvage the already saved
No time remains and we’re burying ourselves
In open arms and sobbing lies
Time is of no significance in our petrifaction
Time is of no consequence in our purification
Early on in the end
We’ll end up dancing alone to the grave
Early on in the end
We end up dancing alone to the grave
You are the beating of my heart
You are the tearing of us apart
You are forever ended

Facebook annoys me
With all the recent changes
I will delete you

We’re lost in translations
Swallowed by tidal waves
The seashore is dried out
No sense in paying retribution
When the ocean recedes
An avalanche of waterfalls fall
Off this desert land
Forced and digested
With diamond hearts
And sapphire eyes
We’re spent to the limit
With such exuberance
It’s calming to sway with the sands
Of a dried out tide
Collecting seashells
And making necklaces
Out of foreclosures for you
Reaching for the stars
Or Saturn’s rings
You leave me scrambling
For something that never existed
In the establishment of our existence
Expectations and dramatizations
Here we sleep on driftwood
Casting ourselves out
To the mercy of the sea
With just a bottle and a message
To get us by
We’re obscured in your sorrow
But ingesting in the dread of tomorrow
And dreaming of obedience denied

Time was we spent in an abyss
Looking towards the falling stars
Like kings of yesteryear
Centuries gone by and dynasties fell
To the tremor of your aftershocks
Thinking thoughts of purity
Reminded me of how we used to be
Pitch black midnight hour
Singles the halo of astrology
And years of vermin run thru the streets
Plaguing the healthy
And making wealth of the diseased
Some thought we could see the end
Some thought we were only where it began
In the ocean I swam with sharks
And made mad friends with the deep
Anchor around my feet
So I can’t risk the escape of air
And digital dreams I’ve remembered
Mixed with truths of your fiction
We depict the despicable in black
Soiled our whites obsolete
With out intentions
And mentions of a better life
We plead for our illuminations
Of a bitter embrace
But descend silent in your aftershocks
Silence in your thoughts

This ship has set sail
With a crew of fifty good men
And twenty heavily coated dogs
Over half the crew will be dead
By the time we reach our destination
On this secret government expedition
Journey to the bottom of the world
To find the Southern Pole
The wind blows us where no life lives
But the bitter cold

From North America
Past the southern tip of Argentina
Harbored at the Falkland Islands
For our last taste of civilization

Six months
Or maybe it was a year or more at sea
To the icy shores of another planet
Encased in endless days of darkness

The ship became marooned
In frozen oceanic tundra
For many winter nights
We the crew chiseled, shoveled
And pick-axed our way to break free
Of our prison made from solid crystal air

Finally unyielding land ahead
An unmovable iceberg
We dock and unload
Steady our sea legs to skis and sleds
The dogs take off across this untraveled land
Pulling us in tow
Faster against the frigid wind
Than our own frostbitten limbs would allow

Ninety degrees south latitude lies somewhere ahead
Blanketed in fresh snowfall and ice storms
Supplies and moral run low as this weary travel continues on

Shaded in zero visibility we set camp for the night
Harbored against the soulless chill
In a frozen crevice of ice mountain
Our health deteriorated and the dogs drained

Polar sleep sets in
The arctic wind chills us to the bone
And my cold eyes close

Nothing* compares to autumn

Standing underneath the hanging tree

Wishing fireflies in the summer breeze

Hushed silence of nature

This is peace


This is my last good *memory

There’s nothing in your future besides death that awaits you here
The road has been blocked for the past few generations
Domineering personalities entangled in hushed librarian undertones
You are private property long since forgotten
As the weeds overtake what little land you once occupied
Amid the interval of mother earth and father sky
Blinks an hourglass
Blinks a lifetime
Sand and hopes
Your time has run out
And there is no grain of life left

Chef Gordon Ramsay
Cooking food in the kitchen
Yelling at people

Yard sales won't sale yard
Garage sales won't sale garage
This disappoints me

I just want to write

I try to listen to music for inspiration
Nothing, it’s silent here

I stumble across photos for inspiration
Some photo I can’t put to words

I open a book and read others words for inspiration
A melody of vocabulary that’s lost on me

I scratch the recesses of my mind
Trying to find some worthy words to scribble down

The only thing that I can see
Is a long line of ‘Z’s’

In front of me

Dismissive reconstruction
Clay sculpted beauty
Sadistic fornication
Touching precision
Molding to perfection

                                                                               Don’t say you’ll deny me
                                                                              I’ve lost my perspective
                                                                                           Eyes bloodshot from addiction

Any reason to make a point
Is made to correct moral mass production

You can write in rhymes
Or write in obscurity
You are a poet

You’ve gone away
You’ve drove away
I wish you away
It’s just another day
We’re left to think
Who we are
And where we are
Alone we are
It’s all the same
We are
And the song from your lips
Sings along
To the roaming of the car
Of who we are
And if this night it comes
It comes to me
Crashing violently
Crashing viciously
But here we are
And there you were
Waiting for me
As I waited for you
In patience obscene
To the end we drove
To the end we rode
It’s okay
It’ll be fine
Some say
It’s just a matter of time
It’s who we are
It’s where you were
It’s where we’ll be
It’s where we’re from
And from it’s the end
And from me I return
And lost in it all
And lost in your all
It’s something said
Something I know
Something believed
Something never known
It’s where we are
It’s who you were
In the end it’s known
In the beginning
It’s unknown
It crashes to me
I plead for your loss
And weep for your lost
And we’re crashing
And we’re crashing
And we’re crashing
And we’re crashing
It’s who we were
It’s where we’re not
And it’s all forgot

Lotus leaf zazen
Phoenix dragon tea sipping
Finding nirvana

There were eighteen angels in the sky today
Many of them died when they did a swan dive
Trying to escape the perfection of heaven
For the more comfortable sins of mortal man

There were no tears spared
Nor no lives forgiven

Just the slow chomp of a golden apple
Heard from mountain top to mountain top
Where the snake slithered out from his earthly dome
To have some fun with simple primates

I remember being all alone
Lost and trapped in my silent home
Broken and bruised*

Down the rabbit hole I began to wander
Always wondering where the other side would lead me
But in my quest I became blind
Blinded by those that seek the guidance
Of Buddha, Christ, Gandhi
And every other groovy hippy messiah
Inducing hallucinations of the good in mankind

I should have been reading Nietzsche all along
But the fine print between the lines was so perverse
That he was too scared
And too scarred
He could not see the potential
Of a stark raving mad world unleashed on itself

Like insects feeding on clockwork
We all get digested as time ticks away

The slithering of her silver dialect
Wraps around my limbs
Tasting and devouring hungrily
On my tattered skin

Black bedroom eyes
Rated ***
Dissect me bit by bit
And piece by piece
A Picasso jigsaw puzzle
Scattered on the coffee table

I hear the screaming of spring
Executing the closing space between us
Our thoughtless embrace
Breaking in the aftermath of blood drenched butchering

I lay your head down on the train tracks
Tell you to stay calm and don’t freight too much
Your hero will come and save you at the very last second
And you’ll walk arm and arm off into the sunset
While I’m getting arrested for the atrocities
That I held in my mind
…
I'll taunt you with words of destruction while you cry
…
Then you'll laugh that I'll never get away with this
…
And at the last second
Right before the train comes barreling down
Over your soon to be lifeless body
And before your hero has the chance to swoop down
And save you from complete annihilation
I’ll pull out your hero's severed head from behind my back
Hold it up high and laugh maniacally
As what just happened settles in too late for you to move
And the train rides down along the track
Covered in blood, flesh, and bone

There’s too much you in the world
Capitalistic ****
Running around
Buying and stealing
Material possessions full of transgression
But I digress because this isn’t really anything
But a test for the best to accomplish
The end result is said to have some underlying meaning
But the end result has been fabricated greatly
Deep in some office shed
We shed the light away from our prying eyes
Always keeping silent
The new discoveries that take away from the almighty dollar
And keep the fat cats in Washington wealthy
Keep laundering their ***** misdeeds
But the suits keep getting more expensive
And the poor get pensive
Wondering what they’re doing wrong
Trying to make ends meet
And put food on the table for a growing family
Of twelve or more
Of twelve or more
The way the holocaust looked
With dead and starving
Pilled high as Buffalo Mountains
And the TV is switched to the news
But there’s nothing new to hear
Here is always what’s pre-approved and sugarcoated censorship
Prove to be abundant in thousands of tentacles
From the octopus of government and social media
You are a trend that is replaceable
And if you stand against their collective
You will cease to have ever existed

Help keep the Zombie Apocalypse from getting out of hand
Rip the lower jaw off the deceased before you bury them

Never to be without the wind

Free, flowing, and blowing

Like a calm hazard

Before the ambush of storm

The natural sway of nature

To beg for and to be

Part of these gentle moments

Where the sun shines just right

And the waking chirp of birds

Singing good morning in bird song

We are everything possible

With potential still to be realized

(insert generic death metal song title here one)

Human blood bath
Soak in ******* and human waste
Got a taste for the diseased human race
Acid melting face
Drink from the spewing flesh
Gurgle and gargle to the dying beat
Of a victims last gulp of tarnished breath

(insert generic death metal song title here two)

Skull cracked and bleeding
Blood **** filled wounds seeping
Immaculate Christ unjaded
Aborted abortion
Born and bathed in afterbirth
Blown and constipated in foreign ***** matter
Torn from arms of zombie flesh
Decaying in the hot summer sun
Baked in the hot summer sun

(insert generic death metal song title here three)

Trash my intended victim with nothing better to do
Than torture **** **** and torture some more
Death does not last in the flesh
Emancipated from life
Just a breath away from dying
Hang on to the threads of the noose
Strangulating the frustrating last gasp of air
Torture **** **** and torture some more
Out of boredom and out of time
Boredom kills
You better watch out
I’m coming for you

(insert generic death metal song title here four)

Hollow eye sockets
Wretched
Reeking
Filthy ****
Plastered on crimson caked hands
****** dirt beneath the fingernails
Scratches scraped in the walls
From bodies dragged thru the hall
Down the stairs to the killing room
Meat hook art show of disembodied
And disemboweled corpses
Dismembered in some horrorshow freakshow
Bowl of human remains cooked on the stove
For this years All-You-Can-Eat chili fest
Lick savory lips with salted tongue
Hunger pains from cannibalistic urges
The brain tastes best when paired with a good wine
Eat, drink, and be merry
Tomorrow you’re on the menu

You mad genius, Hep cat with the small change jinglin’ in your pocket and razorblade at your throat

Jagged gravel voice crooning love songs about the Apocalypse and the gritty city streets

Crazy angel talking to God and dealing with the devil; raconteur to both

Dig that broken glass cry deep down inside rising out of your ragged mouth

Piano playing jazz, muddy beatbox boomin’, guitar wailin’ in the back alley

Car alarms and the thump thrump thump of the bass, city life and high nights

Crank up the noise and blow that sax, got Ol’ Scratch on your back and death hitchin’ a ride

Ya gotta keep the fire burnin’ ‘til the snake oil salesman slither on home to his whiskey bottle

Lyin’ with your dreams on, just keep playing that late night street corner diner song ‘til I’m gone

‘Til I’m dead, far, and gone

I don’t even know where to begin
Possible I should start at the end
Where we are old and dead
Or at the very least lying on our death bed
Talking of our fond memories

Maybe a voiceover for the scenes of our laments
And flashbacks of the lives we lived

Did we do well in our deeds
Did we do badly in our mistrusts
Did we do all that we could do

Or did we just sit at home
Watch television as time passed us by
In cruel shades of silver, black, and white

What do we talk about
In our final moments
In our final breath

Do we pronounce our undying love

Or do we finally choose not to
Ignore our revulsion that festered in our bellies
Like growing infants long passed the due date

I choose to think
We’d speak of adoration
Because in this world
There’s already too much loathing to bear
And not enough love to dwell

Or maybe we do speak of the abhorrence
The contempt that never seemed to die away
From that first moment of infidelity
To the last shouted “I love you”
Shouted during one of those great big
Silent fights that we were known for

Suppose we spoke of both love and hate
Talked and narrated the past many years
In the few moments that we both still continue living

Our dying eyes gazing into the others extinction
A feeling of panic then euphoria overtakes us

And in our last gasping, final breath
I think I’ll tell you
That no matter what our history has produced
There’s no one I’d rather die with
Than you

Scalped and peeling skin of ****** laments
Broken hearted suicide at three am
The early waking dawn of last night’s tragedy
Carved into verminous veins
Scathing with golden luxuries of contempt
Slown moon shivers
Negating passive pretenses momentarily eclipsed in a sea of blood
Bathed in the shallow light of the mirror
Our reflections burn brilliant hues of stygian darkness
**What remains buried is unclear

Strippers blown out of moving caravans of pornographic stature
Lesbians terrifyingly terrify each other to pieces in the back seat
Of a vintage Camero built for speed and automobile crashes
Blood red runs off black lightening sunshine
Telephone polls and graveyard ditches
Can you handle this the raving seductress asks
No problem with the foot on the floor
Driving west
High on scorpion **** and speed
Fire fighters are ravenous breed
Barb-wired writers are blasphemous breed
Chasing antique dreams towards the sunset
Off lost in the Desert Mountains
Thirst for quench and moonshine howls
LA is a happening place
**
Axes
Axles
Axed

My dog will sit and stare at a spot on the wall until I look
When I look, nothing is there
I look back at her and she smiles, looking at me
She is playing tricks on me

All of your hellos
Every time you see me
I’d rather say **bye

***blebee* buzzing
From flower to my shoulder
Don’t pollinate *me

Whimsical wayfarer will waver within wafting water
Waiting where we went when wild winds whimpered wayward warnings
While warring wolves whispered warm wanting wails
Whisking wilted white whales with winter wisdom wonder

Wilderness wanes widespread whilst whiskey whittles wit
Withering without wicked wearisome woes

An entire lifetime remembered
In a solitary fragment of blood
Supernovas explode in the blackness of our eyes
I can see your androgynous ****** form
Sitting in wicker chairs
Juggling martinis and cigarettes
Dressed in Homecoming White
With a penchant for persecution
We’re choking on chlorine
And leisurely drowning in anonymity
Still the daydreams of my consequences linger on

I just had a religious experience
Everything that was everything decorated the skies
                   Life in all its glory and purpose
                         The sun shown in all too brilliant rays cascading sheets of pure light
Upon the animals, the faces, the millions of faces
         The earth
              Covered with mountains, canyons,
                            Gulfs streaming with storms
Oceans of life littering the spaces
            Between wolves howling and grizzlies catching salmon
                          Leaping from fast flowing rivers
                                       The trees and forests grow to such great heights
It’s beautiful
    Too beautiful for my vocabulary
          Lexis fail to describe in detail the pure extravagance of it all
                  The sun changed the hues of vast Eden
                        Spits of negatives and diluted colors
                                Welcoming all as one
                                   Tired eyes from beauty’s light
                                           Counterparts
                                                    ­             The dark so dark that it was hard to focus on
                                                              ­         Moving slowly like a monolithic sludge
Engulfing the light
                 Slowly
                            Till all was dark
                                 Till all was dark
And good and evil existed as one

****
            off.

As
Much As
      I
Love writing
And sharing my poems
            And enjoying others
as Well
I Am Not
     Paying To Upload My Work
On Top Of All The Other
           BILLS
That I Already
                              Have.


This
                       Apparently
Will
              BE
MY                    LAST
  POEM.





It's A Shame That it's not a good one either.

**** the Religious Right
        **** Those That Condemn Others
                **** The Republicans
                        **** The Democrats
                                **** The Government Having Too Much Say In Our Lives
                                  **** Paying Taxes
                                    **** The Gas Company
                                             **** The Water Company
                                                     **** The Electric Company
                                                         ­     **** Cars
                                                            ­          **** Car Payments
                                                        ­                      **** Being Late On Payments
                                                        ­                              **** Bills All Together
                                                        ­                                      **** Not Getting Benefits For Being Early On Payments
                                                        ­                                              **** My Need To Capitalize Every Word
                                                            ­                                                  **** PETA
                                                            ­                                                          **** People That Mistreat Animals
                                                         ­                                                                 ­    **** Vegetarians
                                                     ­                                                                **** Carnivores
                                                      ­                                                        **** Omnivores, What You Can't Choose A Side?!?!?
                                                       ­                                             **** Going To College Just To Work At McDonalds
                                                       ­                                     **** White Collar Getting Paid More Than Blue Collar
                                                          ­                          **** Having A Collar
                                                          ­                  **** The People That Reproduce Too **** Much
                                                            ­         **** Those That Think There's No Future In Children
                                                        ­      **** Commercialism
                                                  ­     **** Never Running Out Of Things To ****
                                               **** People That Say They Have No Friends But They're Always Too Busy To Do Anything Cuz They're Already Hanging Out With Someone Else
                                       **** Anyone Who Likes This Poem
                               **** Anyone Who Doesn’t Like This Poem
                      **** 6,000 Channels On TV And Nothing Is Ever On
              **** The Summer Sun
      **** Global Warming
**** Flat Pop
        **** Hot Coffee That Gets Cold
                **** Pets Dying
                         **** Death
                                 **** Wasting Life
                                         **** People That Talk To Much
                                                 **** People That Cuss
                                                          Fu­ck People That Have A Problem With Cussing
                                                         ­          **** Fox News
                                                            ­               **** Anyone That Lives Their Life Strictly By A Book (especially you Harold And The Purple Crayon people out there)
                                                          ­                          **** Laugh Tracks Telling Me When To Laugh
                                                           ­                                 **** Everything That You Stand For
                                                             ­                                       **** Everything That You Are
                                                             ­                                                **** Everything That You're Not
                                                             ­                                                         **** Finishing This Poem, I'm Gonna Go Eat
                               **** Anything That I Forgot To **** In This POEM

Tropical blue
Cool night breeze
Ocean tides and Red Lobster life

Tropical blood
Swimming with crocodiles
Chomping on left over Cubans

Tropical view
Wind chime serenade
Second hand smoke grenade

Tropical blue blood
Ocean wave recedes
Water and volcanic sludge

Tropical blue blood view*
Nightlife in all its brilliance
Late night moonlit romance

Outside her apartment window
Hidden in the shadows of lawn ornaments and sullen trees
I stand against the onslaught of a sour storm
Beat down ragged and suspended in pouring rain
I take one last long hard drag off of my cigarette
Spit out a ravenous piece of cancerous lung
Peer past the tree leaves and oak branches
Her exquisite corpse of a silhouette gestures madly
Distracting discussions over the telephone
Locked safely behind her closed curtains
My fists begin to clench tightly in some remorseless insult
My feet slink like a ghost ship up the staircase leading to her residence
The doorknob seems to turn effortlessly in the palm of my rain soaked hand
I slither into the darkened living room
With only the slightest creak and moan of the wooden floorboard
With only treacherous laments rising through my heartbroken mind
Her bedroom door a glow in a shimmering sultry fluorescent halo
I stand outside of another dimension
Listening to her silken voice decry her shamed heart
Brightstar plays softly in the background
Framing the anguish of uneasy conversations
My breath feels like molten lead
Heavy and filling the space between her beauty and me
Compelled by some deep rooted idea racing in my brain
My hand reaches towards the doorknob and noiselessly turns
Her back is to me
She cannot see me
She never sees me
This consideration hangs in the storm-ravaged night
As the clouds conceal the sky
And the eyes of whatever benevolent being may exist
We are alone
Just her and I
The way that it should have been
The way that it will always be
The distance between us closes as my whole body moves with silent enraged urgency
She feels my hot breath breathing and blowing against wisps of hair draping down her shoulder
She utters out a frightened gasp and hastily turns to face the monster behind her
A coy smirk slips across her beautiful lips
And her martini eyes enliven with the burn of ecstasy
Her arms constrict around my frame in some coalescent embrace
She begins to smother me with kisses and tears
As she howls about brighter days and star filled nights in the country
I stand stoic
Undamaged by her latest exhibit of penitence filled affection
I gently lift her head up by the chin
Gaze reflectively into her eyes
And give her one last kiss…


One last kiss.