Ive wrote this for you to read in the morning
Now read this clear because it's your final warning
I'm begging you to stop drinking
Now I know what you're thinking
You say this to me every single night
But think about it, you know it's not right
It's slowly killing you
You know it's true
But what are you going to do?
Open another beer?
Please see it clear
I know you can escape this pit
The drink, you honestly don't need it
You've got that power inside
So please don't hide
Behind not being sober
Because in a blink of an eye I will able be over
So when you wake up with a sober mind
Read this all and you come to find
That everything I've said you know to be true
Because unfortunately I am you

11th of November we stand in silence
And just for a minute we forget all the violence
We pay respect to those who fought
And carry the lessons that they taught
This poppy hold strong, pinned to my chest
Thank you to the soldiers you may all rest

I'll take one more sip, keep drinking to feel good
I say like I'll stop when I know I never could
Poison In my veins making me feel this way
Keep drinking and drinking is all my head can say
Trying to numb the pain of daily life
Drinks getting stronger and stronger, stabbing me like a knife
I start to stumble and stutter
Regretting words that I mutter
Spilling thoughts that I keep buried inside
Wake up and realise what I've said, wishing I could just hide
Thinking the liquor was my friend, well I'm guessing it lied
Back in reality and now I want to just cry
So I'll return to the bottle and drink till I die

And just like that I turn 22
Yet a month ago I didn't think I was going to see this year through
Coming to terms with my own mortality
I never thought this would be my reality
But here I am now, still alive
Years of pain I'd never thought I'd survive
Though the pain may never truly fade away
I'm glad I get to live to see another day

I danced with the flame knowing I'll get burned
The same old lesson I never learned
Playing with fire is fun till start to feel pain
Trying to hold onto something you can never obtain
Once the ash settles you'll never forget
Dancing with the fire is something you'll regret

If you ever raise you voice at a woman then you're weak
Shouting horrible things you know you shouldn't speak
You don't control her, you're supposed to be a team
You don't realise you're living another guys dream
Honestly *******, your pathetic and insecure
One day she'll realise that she deserves more
Don't take her for granted or she'll just up and leave
Sooner rather than later I'd hope to believe
Sorry I've been drinking so my anger spilled onto the page
But the way you treat her fills me with rage
Or maybe I should just keep drinking
And let you know how I'm truly thinking
Because I feel like I'm dying
You keep her crying
And if I said this is all ok then I'd be ******* lying
I care way to much about this girl to be silent
But you're not worth fighting so I won't get violent
But if you saw her how I see her then you wouldn't treat her like this
You understand she's one in a million, something you don't want to miss
I think I should drink more till I pass out
But don't you dare break the heart of the girl I care about
Guess this is what it feels like to be on the outskirts
I don't think she understands how much my heart hurts

Do you treat him like you used to treat me
Or is he a better guy than I'll ever be
I used to drive hours just to get yelled at
I bet he doesn't ever get that
Have you realised what you did and finally changed ways
While I'm all alone lost in this scary maze
Because now he's got you and living a perfect life
While I'm looking at my wrists holding a knife

I am a poet
That's lost all meaning
Words come together
Like a child crying, screaming
Dreaming of a way to make these words feel new
I am a poet
That doesn't know what to do
Writings not the same
It just feels different
Maybe the passions been tamed
Or maybe I'm just different
I am a poet
Or maybe I'm not
I used to write loads
Now I can't write a lot
If you were to ask me what I am I'd tell you I forgot
Am I a poet?

I confessed my feelings to you on the phone
Laid out everything that I wished to be know
I cried my heart out, I couldn't take it no more
You're the person I've always been looking for
It's always been you and you said the same
I told you I loved you and felt no shame
My night look dim till I heard your voice
I couldn't ignore if I wanted to, I don't have a choice
You hold my heart with the tightest grip
A girl like you I'd never let slip

I'd rather tell drunken truths than sober lies
Endless poems you've come to despise
Words without meaning, words without rhyme
Words thoughts, words lost in time
Hold my hand and never let go
My sober feelings you will never truly know

Emotionally I'm broken, I'm hiding behind a shell
I just laugh through the pain, I'm stuck in this hell
People see me as fake me, the opposite to how I feel
I'm not who I want to be, my reality isn't real

Real eyes, realise, real lies
Stuck with a man whom you really despise
I know how you feel by the tone in your voice
Maybe picking him was the wrong choice
Or maybe I'm wrong and just being confused
I just don't want to see you hurt or used

Drinking myself numb again
Night after night
God I know this path is wrong
But why does it feel so right?
Sat here alone
Slowly going insane
Drinking to just try numb the pain

I don't know why I fell so hard over you
But you unlocked feelings I never thought I knew
You may not be my first love but I hope you're my last
I want only you in my future and not in my past

You're everywhere in this garden
I cant escape your sight
Your the grass by the path
The Moss on the stump
Leaves raked up into a little clump
Algea on the water
Adding life to never-ending blue
Even the depths of that void cannot contain you
For you lay upon the riverbed
Dancing with the stream
You're the weeds in the cracks
Poking through my drive
You embody life in every single way
We'll miss you come winter
When your influence fades
When life feels ghostly
So we wait until spring
And watch you bloom again
You're the colour in this garden
Green Green Green

I'm not good for anyone
It's clear to see
You know I'm a ******* drunk
Just look at me
I just keep sipping
Till I hit the floor
Stumbling and tripping
I can't even write sober anymore

She haunts my dreams
She haunts my dreams
Nothing as, it, seems
I dont know
I dont know
I dont,
Know
She left me down in this hell
Trapped in a cell
Down in this hell
Feeling like I'm dying
Everytime
I close
My eyes....
Is this how it ends?
What does all this mean?
Mean? Mean?
She haunts my dreams
Dreams Dreams

I tell God I love you, more than life itself
Rich, broke or poor, I'd love you more than any wealth
I'd hold you hand no matter what
I'd kiss you here right now on the spot
Because I love you so much, you're my one and only
Please don't leave babe, I'd be so lonely
Just give me you're pinky and hold it tight
Because the love we share feels so right

I think it's time for me to sleep, it's been a long day
Wrote to many poems, ran out of things to say
But when I close my eyes I still see you there
Just out of reach, life's not fair

I'm waiting for you
On the other end of the phone
It's weird when you don't respond
I honestly feel so alone
Just a simple text makes my day
Added to all you type and say
Lost in your words
And all you write
Waiting for you
On this lonely night

All of these feeling finally off my chest
Now I know I can lay to rest
I told you I loved you and you said it back
Hearing those world almost gave me a heart attack
Can't tell you how happy I feel
I've honestly never felt love this real
Say it again till it's tattooed on my heart
Because I've loved you since the very start

The sky never ends and nore does my love
Hoping one day it will hit you from above
Because your not here, I'm living in fear
I wish you was near because I miss you my dear
I'll find you again, never let you go
I love you more than you will ever know

I can see the stars when I'm gazing at you
You've left me starstruck and I don't know what to do
Like I'm in a trance just by your voice
Always drawn to you like I don't have a choice
I'm so in love with you and everything you are
Whenever you need me I'll jump straight in my car
An hour and a half drive doesn't seem so far
If it mean I get to gaze at my star
Drive all night to be right by your side
You unlocked feels I used to hide
Now read this clearly because what I say is true
One day I'm going to marry you
I can't see a world where you're not my wife
You're my shining star, the love of my life
Now give me that pinky and never let go
I love you so so much, more than you'll ever know

I think I miss you
But you were never mine
I hate that's it's true
But I'm honestly not fine
Because even though you're not here
Im missing you everyday
Wishing you were near
Why do I miss you in this way ?

We were toxic, yes I know
A love that we should not have let grow
But why am I finding it so hard to let go
I still hold so much love for you
I honestly do know what to do
We weren't perfect and we both had issues
Shed so many tears and used too many tissues
You know if you called I come back straight away
Because you're all I want at the end of the day
I wish we could have worked on our problems and solved them together
Because I still love you and I'll love you forever

When I say I love you its because its true
Though we've never met I really miss you
You seem to hold my heart like you've owned it before
I think you're the angel I've been looking for

I look up and the moon and only think of you
So far away but such a beautiful view
If only I could reach it and hold on to it tight
But day is starting to break so I'll wait for the next night
I'd wait for you forever because you are my soulmate
Like the moon and the earth we are locked in this fate

When the devil took me he laughed and said
"The sins of your past will haunt you now you're dead
And the sins you committed hold much weight"
I said to him "If loving her was a sin then what be my fate?"
He look down apon me and said "do you really think love was your sin?"
What I utter next took away his grin
I told the devil that my sins came from love
"I would have stole, lied, murdered and all of the above.
I showed her love in a world full of hate
She was my heaven in this twisted curl fate
Any man that wronged her I would fight to the death
I would do anything for that woman till my last breath
I know I'm not prefect and I never will be
But I loved with all my heart because that's just me
So I'm guilty of loving because my morels won't budge
Doesn't matter what I say when the devil is my judge
I saw heaven without ever going
She knows she is loved and that loves still growing
And I died a happy man, you can never take that from me
So if loving is a crime then it's in hell I must be"
The devil look angry and mumbled"just go"
A bright light above my head then started to show
He shouted as I floated away
"Once you go back this will be your last chance then"
I replied with a gin "I can't wait to do this dance again

It was like something from a film, when I stepped off that train
So so many thoughts rushing through my brain
Is this a mistake, will she even like me
Turn the corner and what do I see
The most beautiful girl there ever could be
She hugged me with a grip ever so tight
All those thoughts left me because this felt so so right
After that hug Im certain that I know
This is a girl I never want to let go
I don't need drugs because she is my ecstasy
Life won't be tough when I have her next to me

Whenever we call I always get butterfly's
Don't know if its the same feeling for any other guys  
I cant top smiling whenever I see you face
A beautiful site I never want to replace
I wish we could share these moments in person together
Memories that I will cherish forever

Inside my heart melts a orange-gold hue
Spreading so far
Like a love flood for you
Inside my head crashing thoughts, bouncing feelings
Left down up right
I can't hold the mind still
Inside my soul a holy light reigns new
You are my glory my spirit
Bound with everlasting glue
No word describes this euphoria
As it exploded inside me
A crescendo of ecstasy
I am but a puppet
On your string
Strung on your love

I look upon death
Because I'm scared of the present
The pressure of life
Keeps me
Holding on to better times
When I was happy
Because in the now
I'm scared of everything
And never happy
But when I look upon
That past that I lived
Loved even
My glasses have clarity
But even when I look back
Death still lingering
In my memorys

There was this girl who I loved so dear
When I held her in my arms I had nothing to fear
We weren't both prefect, we'd argue, we'd fight
But just her love would get me through the night
Even though she's gone I still love her for sure
But it's hard knowing she's not my girl anymore

We walk a dangerous line when we start to flirt
Because someones feelings are bound to be hurt
We can dance over this fine line
But in the end I just want you to be mine

Let me be clear, you're all that's on my mind
Looking for an answer and you're all that I find
You live through my poems, because I can't tell you to your face
Or maybe I'm scared you'll put me in my place
I want to know how you feel but I'm scared of your answer
It takes two to tango but I think I'm the only dancer
Just be honest and let me know
Or is this a place that you cannot go
Maybe one day we can lay things out
And I'll get to know what you're thinking about

You dance like the burning embers with fiery passion
Though never leaving the fire pit you burn bright and bold
Letting everyone you come across know you're there
Sporadic in nature, never truly tamed
Destructive as all hell
But such a pretty and warm sight
You're a crimson red flame burning down the night

I'm not just for Christmas, I'm for life
And I can promise you that I'll make you my wife
I'll be here forever and keep hold of you heart
You already stole mine from the very start
My soulmate, my true love, my very best friend
I'll keep loving you tilly very end
Kisses, hugs all wrapped in a bow
I love you more than you'll ever know

People speak lies just to ruin another's day
Ruined me and now I don't know what to say
Going to lose her because of a stupid lie
All I want to do is cry
When I said I loved you it wasn't fake
No other girl I like you, I'd never make that mistake

I hope in another life we're still together
Maybe we actually reached forever
We worked on our issues hand in hand
We completed everything that we had planned
Another life me hopefully made you his wife
I hope we're still together, in another life

The room was full of empty faces when I first saw you
I tried not to stare but I didn't know what else to do
Nothing but a red dress and a flirtatious stare
You saw me looking but didn't seem to care
I watched you dance under the moon so bright
Wishing to talk to you but not a thought in site
Time went slow as you walked towards me
My heart started racing ever so fastly
But just kept walking with not a work spoken
Do I risk talking to you or get my heart broken
Regretting not speaking now my mind is a mess
I will never forget you, the girl in the red dress

I think I love you to, skipped through the like stages
I want you to be my last chapter filled with all the best pages
I hope you feel the same as I do, because I've got nothing but clarity
I second without you is like an endless reality
So dark and cold when you're my warmth and light
Hold me close dear and we'll make it through the night
See I write not money, recognition or even fame
My words just keep pouring because you're my eternal flame
There's a tattoo on my heart and only spells your name
If lifes single player not co-op then I don't want to play this game
Thinking about you alone gives me a reason to write
I hope you never let go of my words and keep them held tight
Back to my original point if I can remember it clear
But I'm drinking and driving, I think I need you to steer
Oh yeah I remember now I think I'm love
Must thank the God above when he sent me down this beautiful dove
Its just a feeling I have and if you'll be my queen I'll be your king
Because I'm sick of dreaming about this, I need the real thing

My words don't compare to the art you create
Paintings so beautiful but let me be straight
Your works of art reflect who you are
All your love, your energy even a long lasting scare
Hands of an artist, you're second to none
You paint stories and I wish to live one

As I look at your grave, I start to cry
All I can ask is why
Why were you taken?
Did it have to be you?
And if I'm not mistaken
You were only 52
Taken to young, why God why?
Why did you let my grandfather die?
You took a good man away from our family
Is this the way it has to be?
Can I not see him for even just a day?
I don't think you're listening every time I pray
Maybe I'm foolish maybe it's all just lies
I'm starting to think you're the devil in disguise

I keep drinking every night
I need a drink just to write
The words of a drunk man
To the same bottle he ran
Sip after sip he would write some more
Sip after sip the words did pore
Reading these words the truth I know it
I am the alcoholic poet

I wish I was an artist
I wish I could paint you
Using every colour known to man
And hang you up on my wall
For everyone to see
I wish I was a singer
I wish I could write you a song
Play it on repeat
For everyone to hear
I wish I was a poet
I wish I could write about you
People need to know what these feelings mean
For every drop of blood I bleed
Is a drop of love that I hold for you
I write and I write
Because I cant contain this
I wish I wish I wish

Get out of my head, I'm begging you now
Wish I could stop thinking about you but I don't know how
So I keep writing in hopes it helps me heal
But I the pain wont go and it feels so real
I want to drink to forget
Instead I cut myself and regret
You're hunting my mind, please leave my head
Because I know if you don't then I'll end up dead

A fire burns inside my heart
Cogs turning but refuse to start
I love you
But somethings stuck
Help me please
I'm running out of luck

I don't sleep like I used to, nights have come cold
Thoughts always clouded with the memories of old
My beds so soft but I can't seem to rest
My beds so empty without you laying on my chest
I close my eyes but never feel at ease
My body's so worn just let me rest ....... Please

A broken record, I love you so much
Low on battery, recharged by your touch
You truly are the omega of my heart
A beautiful painting, Gods work of art
When I'm with you, you cleanse my sin
There's so much to say, where do I begin?
On my darkest days, you get me through the night
When my path is wrong, you put it right
Words cant describe what you mean to me
If perfect was a word, you'd be what I see
Like a broken record, playing on repeat
Only you make my heart skip a beat
I love you so much, I tell you forever
I love you so much, we're meant to be together

If you ever feel sad you can always come to me
I'll pick you back up and cleanse any insecurities
Let your tears flow down my chest
And all these demons we can lay to rest
For you are perfect in every single way
You're the only trophy I'd put on display