It comes in waves and surges,
aching in my bones and coursing through my veins,
and I wish I could hate you and curse your name,
but at the end of the day it is I who takes the blame.

I wish I could rewind back,
think to myself stop and think about what is wrong,
because I would see it's not us or you but me
and I could apologise and cry and tell you how much I am sorry but now when the moon is in the sky and my only companions are the scabs on my arms and the ***** burning in my throat my words aren't so clear and my message isn't so simple and I just wish
I could hate you and curse your name,
but at the end of the day it is I who takes the blame.

Let me sleep,
please.
I am so tired of being tired,
I want to rest and forget but you haunt my mind,
both awake and asleep.
I apologise for the millionth time,
crying out for you to forgive me but my words are not heard,
they never will be.
I miss you,
infinitely.
I ache from endless heart ache,
I want to rewind or at least rid my mind of you but I cannot,
both awake and asleep.