I am not writing and doing nothing because I need a break from working, I am doing it because I am upset and I am trying really hard to escape myself.

I changed my mind.
I'm not doing it anymore.
I don't need to add anything else to everything that's drowning me.
Two weeks would be hell
And I don't think it will make me happy.
I just won't be happy period.
There's not much I can do about that.

You guys are smiling and making jokes
You tell me I should really be working
I tell you I'm too tired to work right now
I'm not tired
Well, I am, but that's not why I'm not working
I just can't breathe
I know I'm not alone, but I feel completely alone and I don't know Why I'm feeling so hollow
Make it stop. Please.
You don't notice though.
Maybe it's better that you don't.
I'll keep listening to sad music and wonder why I'm feeling so empty when nothing is even wrong
And you keep not knowing how horrible I feel
Because you have problems a lot worse than mine, for sure
I don't want to tell you, because you don't deserve to have to listen to my sadness on top of your own
And I feel selfish if I tell you
I just don't know who to talk to
And even though I'm surrounded by people
I. Feel. So. Lonely. I. Feel. Like. I. Have. Died.

I'm really sad.
I don't know why.
Let's go **** happy people!

(no offense happy people... sorry...)

You tell me it's okay
You're fine
But you are lying
It hurts when no one notices
I know
I always thought
I was good at seeing when others were hurting
It was one thing I could do
Be a good friend
But now I know
I am not even that
I am so sorry
I wish I could take your pain
And keep it for myself
Bear the burden you don't deserve
Shelter you both from the world
Stop you from hurting
I can't
So it turns out
I'm just a ****** person

FAJITAS