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Always between the loving and the cold hearted

Longing for a hug's warmth
Fearing the hugger's grasp

Longing for the taste of a kiss
Fearing the treason of the lips

Longing for company while fearing solitude
Fearing the heartbreak while longing for love
I’m not empty.
It’s not that I don’t feel anything.
The exact opposite.

I feel so much.

So much I get desensitized to my own emotions.
They flow around like water in every corner of my body.
Mixing in with my blood until there is no cell untouched.

It used to be a gentle lake.
But now It’s an ocean.
So all I can do is sit here and pretend that I’m a puddle.
Just like everyone else.
Heaven rained on me,
I breathed in the petrichor,
Bathed in the downpour.
I have sinned,
So destroy me,
With your rain.
Is it cruel to silence a pregnant woman with a dozer
Sold their souls to a war criminal's thirst
Rationalizing every lies with more of them, so kosher
Ask the children died of starvation and thirst
Ever felt threatened by the fire they spit
Lessons never learned, or was it a skit
It's inhuman to take side with criminals, we all learn about our homeland freedom fighters or conflicts against oppression. This is not history, this is happening in front of our eyes, yet we are blind.
Media influenced wars gathering support from logical people filling their lives with lies.
In the end, truth shall prevail
But at what cost??
I am like a single-celled protist.
A shaped shifter that quietly dwells;
In a drop of water, with no fixed cells.
I move with my pseudopods.
To have you close enough, and engulf you;
Like phagosome, We fused anew.

I'm like the river, flowing endlessly.
Turning into pebbles, smoothed by time
And the river's currents rhyme.
I move with the rapids.
Where emotions flow
like meandering streams;
Navigating life's constant themes.

I'm like the growing moss.
After a volcanic eruption;
Growing stronger, in chaos' destruction.
I move amidst the barren rocks
Where shadows softly creep;
In nature's quiet keep.

I'm like an old bonsai tree.
Roots deep, filled with histories;
Whispering tales of time mysteries.
I move with a silent breeze
Branches reaching the sky,
With leaves never asking why.

As the universe unfolds,
I am but a fragment, playing my part.
Like a star moving with cosmic tides
In a distant galaxy that silently glides.
I am, therefore I am.
Thank you, Dad.
     Endurance
          Help.
One pill,
two pill,
three pill, four,
i self-medicate
and contemplate
the love i can't
reciprocate.

One year,
two year,
three year, four,
i survived
and archived
the love i couldn't
revive.

One time,
two time,
three times, four,
i command
and expand
the love i now
demand.
manipulatable ground's

most likely paved over.

country me.

thus far & farther.

let alone was demanded--

by standstills of elevation.

presiding over wishing wells

of trees making valley.

shadowlands, composite

sketches: America.

Queens NY is expecting a

significant snowstorm.

expecting~
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