each day i hope for something better
as though the darkness fades away in the night
and the daytime washes the remains clean

if only reality was like this
and i didn't wake up still teary-eyed,
waiting for dead of night to come again
allowing me to lay my head
and let my pillow catch the waterfall again.

why is it the people I always check in with,
never check in with me?

And even when they do,
it is never more than a simple,
"how are you?"

i want love
and im scared of love
and im sick of love
and im so tired.

and yet my heart continues to beat,
as if it's aching for another soul to fall in love with it,
and as if it knows it will once beat to the same rhythm as another;

I've tried to hide my emotions for so long,
I'm starting to forget what I'm hiding.

It sometimes comes back to me,
like a dark wave of awakening,
and then back to the light and fake smiles I go.

I often look up at the television
seeing heroes like the black widow,
and warriors like blodreina,
and I want to have this power,
but a society with people like this cannot function.

These people inflict so much pain on civilians,
that they would never be allowed to exist,
in reality.

Hidden under the depths,
they may be discovered,
but killers and the innocent cannot coexist,
despite needing each other to survive.

im numb
but still sad
what is this life
something straight out of hell
its hard to breathe
and i wish i could be happy
but everything is just
so grey

have no fear,
don't look back
only take words of wisdom,
from your own soul.