I'm not in control

I can't stop

I don't want to destroy myself
But my hands, they do

I yell and scream
Try as I might
I cannot stop

My hands won't listen to me
They are not mine

Please stop tearing me apart
Please stop the pain
Please stop destroying this body of mine

No love is true or false
Love is love
Same for all
Sacred and pure.

It is just that
Some people love and
some only pretend.

I am getting older
and you are too
I might not be around
to know the older you
but you
got to know
the older me
which I suspect will look
a lot like
the older you
and
I got to know
the younger you
which I know
although you won’t agree
looks a hell of a lot
like me!

I have all the fortunes, the riches,
The world knows me for great fame.
I can visit the mountains, the beaches,
For there is not a sole to blame.

I don't have the greatest wealth,
The world may not know my presence.
Mountains, the beahces, I may not take their breath,
The world's elegance, I may not have their sense.

The mountains, I savour alone,
The beaches, I savour alone.
The entire globle is where I roam,
Never to find a place I can call home.

I live in normalcy, it might seem no strain,
I don't experience luxury, it's a life quite plain.
Every moment is spent with mates, with family,
Their timeless love is what makes the ordinary, extraordinary.

You can whisper her name
The frost departing your mouth
Because you know the warmth
The hugs that healed you

She was the one,
She made you feel complete
She gave you everything she could
She needed you more than she valued herself

Yet you’re self-destructive
What else will you throw away?
You didn’t deserve her,
Yet you miss her..

I stand on mountains, tall and free,
Not just by strength, but what you see.
Your kindness lifts, your light inspires,
Filling my soul with boundless fires.

The valleys low once held my fears,
But now they shimmer, calm and clear.
For every step, for every climb,
Your voice resounds - “You are divine.”

So here I stand, with skies so wide,
Heart unfurled, filled with pride.
You lift me up, you help me soar,
Now grounded strong, yet wanting more.

I wake up to,
the cool wind that gently blows
as the fog hides the sun that glows.

I wake up to,
the smell of jasmine that blooms everyday
and to see the colourful flowers that never betray.

I wake up to,
the birds chirping,
to the leaves that sway like the girl I met the other day.

I wake up now to,
my beautiful girlfriend
whom even on her worst days
is no less than the most beautiful flowers.

I wake up to,
next to the most gorgeous girl,
to be with her the next life I shall pray.

I wake up to,
spread love, not hate.

I wake up to,
make the most of these beautiful days,
and to accept death is as crucial as birth.

I wake up to,
realise that all the drama shall play
but when comes the day,
we all shall lay in a grave.

people keep telling me to text him less,
dont reply immediately,
let him search for me,
let him call me first,
but why?
why do i have to show less love to be treated properly?
when i have all the love inside me to give?
even if it will end up hurting me one day,
it will be his loss at the end of the day,
because why?
he didnt realize that someone was capable of loving him more than he could ever give to himself,
and i am not ashamed of loving.