why am I now a simmering *** of anxiety
and what is the boiling point of this grief
when will I sound as a desperate kettle? unsettling steam, soprano scream that goes unheard- just tip me over already!
I'm as touchy as an exposed nerve or a wire about to surge

my attention rife with little fears absurd

love came uninvited and I can't get in a word

the girl in the shape of a question mark with  unsure hand that says neither come close nor go away
and the "what can I say? I miss you? I feel less than deserving and need you all the same "-
that's the one that I hate
her apologies excuse themselves and not one heard the blame
what a sorry excuse for a human, a faltering syllable wanting a name