and i know you weren't right for me.
i take the time to memorize every scar
on someone else's body.
i look to see what makes their eyes light up
and what completely drives them mad.
i had every scar on your body memorized
and you barely even glanced at me.
you had me around, but for all the wrong
reasons.
what you neglected to realize was that i was a hurricane in the midst of the sunshower that was your life.
maybe you should've payed more attention when you had the chance.

Tell me about the person who broke your heart.
Tell me about the color of their eyes.
How their hair felt in between your fingers.
Tell me about the rhythm of their heart.
Tell me about the last words they said to you and how they took every last breath out of you.
Tell me about all the places you used to go to with them, and how when you went for the first time without them all you saw was ghosts.
Tell me about the ache in your bones when you see them in your dreams and how it lasts years
months
days.

And i knew
i was completely ruined
when the sight of your
eyes started to make me
weak at the knees.
i started to memorize
each curl at the
nape of your neck.
i promised myself
i wouldn't let this happen,
but we all know i'm weak for
the things that don't need me.

All I wanted was you,
but all you wanted
was her.

Every time I drive home
late at night
my mind tells me to
drive to you,
but I haven't heard from you
in months.
I still wonder if you
ever regret kissing me
goodbye for the last time.
If you replay the moment
in your head over and over
again, wishing
you had never changed your mind.
We all know feelings and life
change like the weather
and there was nothing I could have
done to get you to stay.

The slowest
most painful
death you will ever have
is wanting someone
who doesn't want you.

I keep seeing your eyes everywhere i go.
I keep feeling your arms wrapped around me
in my dreams.
Sometimes i'll be driving through
a beautiful sunset
and your scent will come
across me.
I had every crack and callus on your
hands memorized.
And now I barely remember the sound of
your voice.
And thats life
and I am trying to be okay with that.
Okay with the fact that I might die
one day without ever seeing you again,
hearing you again.
You were my life and now
you're absolutely nothing but
a memory.
All I want to know is if you
miss me too.
This is the cold truth about life.