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Fourteen , his whole life ahead of him
Broken hearted, he already knew of that
Guitar , his only true friend at night
Manic depression, keeping him up and down
Sobriety, the only thing keeping him drowning
Leaving, our hearts open wounds on heart day
R.i.p Nate Flint.  You have never left.
 Feb 2014 Sade LK
Andrew Durst
I'm pacing back n' forth in the recesses of my mind.
Thinking about tomorrow; as if I have the time.
I've got a book of regrets and a list of excuses.
Stitches for the cuts and ice for the bruises.
I've got the heart of a warrior but the guts of a coward.
And I'm always screaming inside my mind; as if silence could get any louder.

I'm trying to stay positive; I'm trying to learn.
But it's hard to move forward when your "success" is everyone else's concern.
They're always breathing down my neck and saying things like "you can do better!"
But I guess they don't know that my ambitions change with the weather.
I can't explain it or even begin to understand why.
It's something that's out of my control no matter how hard I try.
I wrote this several days ago. Never posted it. Enjoy.
One cut
Two cuts
Three cuts
Four
Come on now
Whats just one more?
Four cuts
Five cuts
And lastly
Six
Nothing bad
Its just a nick
Seven cuts
Eight cuts
Nine cuts
Ten
I have missed this
I last did it... when?
Cuts and scars
Across her legs
One day
I think
I'll wind up
**Dead.
 Feb 2014 Sade LK
aviisevil
I'm falling apart as i watch the sun set
Oh how i wish to just let go and forget
But now i have this reality staring at me instead
And no matter what i do , its now not just in my head

Every thought is escaping and making a home of its own
Every whisper is now gone , leaving me so alone
Now i have no one to reach out for , every moment a new pain is born
All i have is my heart as i head to the unknown

Every part of me is decaying and dying
As i fall like a pack of cards , winds are leaving their sign
Every tear is rain , even the stars know that I'm crying
And i look in the mirror in a hope to convince myself that I'm just lying

Hands are cold and arms long for a last embrace
I wither before age , i can't even recall my face
Every sight is blurred behind this reflecting haze ,
That makes me see every sight that escapes my gaze

I can't breathe , jaws of my own gloom
strangle me
I want to leave, but the strings of my own doom won't let me be
And i can't see , every last drop of blood in me wants to be free
Drench me in my own nightmares to drown in my own sea
Sacredness of life that i just couldn't keep , of my own creed
A ray of hope and my sinking boat could never meet
Making an ocean of my own sorrow as my every tear bleeds




There's a hope in my heart and death wish in my mind
A will to live that's over-shadowed by the weakness of leaving it all behind
Mind is numb and the eyes are now scared to remind
That I'm lost and i can't find , myself
And now i should even stop trying


For I'm on the edge of existence , standing on a blade that'll cut right through
Sometimes you can't return, no matter how much you want to
You can stay in that moment forever just waiting for it to end
Or you can take a step forth , right into the approaching end


Kiss death for now its your only friend ,
It might show you the way back home.
Notes (optional)
 Feb 2014 Sade LK
Olga Valerevna
I can see your shadow coming closer in the dark
Growing like a tumor while I slowly fall apart
Nothing like a moment to remind you that you're weak
Grazing on the bits of truth you never fought to keep
Yet somewhere underneath the skin of what you have become
There exist the rudiments of silences to drum
But how do you identify a peace you cannot see
And put your trust in every part invisible to me
I am not the one who claimed your body as my own
So I will sit here ripping all the stitches we have sewn
And as the holes expose themselves the light begins to dance
Gradually consuming, letting go of what I can't
title taken from Run River North's, "Fight to Keep"
 Feb 2014 Sade LK
Olga Valerevna
There came a night when everything I never knew I kept
Escaped my skin, a whisper's breath - you held me and I wept
And somewhere in the time it took for me to settle down
The simple act of being calm seemed all the harder now
From then a salty kind of rain would daily burn my skin
And multiply the passageways through which I'd let you in
I needed them to flood enough for me to let you out
Create the kind of waterfall that made a single route
And as you'd drift away from me, return the strength I lack
Return to me a state of mind I want to set on track
Within the absence you'd supply I'd shed my weary gaze
And take another step toward the frame for which I'm made
Reciprocated.
 Feb 2014 Sade LK
Lappel du vide
"are you depressed?"

i wipe my eyes of
slow
grogginess,
i pull myself struggling out of a
fluctuating dream state to rest
temporarily in reality.

"what?"

"oh well... wanting to sleep through everything, and never
wanting to do anything is one of the
leading causes of
depression"

thanks i really had no ******* idea

"well i had it all through middle school
so i wouldn't be surprised."

"maybe you should talk to someone about it,"

i packed my things
angrily
loud, in her
echoing teal classroom,
and left quickly.

*she really has no ******* clue
Perspectives changing mind states
High grades turning doors of sight
Using the daily dose breathing deep
Killing yourself by staying up too late
Its fine you lost track , everyone does
Just remember where communication is at
Does lay in the head , when flame is this best
Way to deal with the dead, rather than the grave
Ashes blowing whist fully to the heavenly gates.
Dont ever let me keep you up late.
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