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Don't worry, spiders,
I keep house
casually.
I am in love with tomorrow
The one where I swim oceans,
Write at a bistro in Paris,
Drown my sorrows in Bombay rains.
I never thought that I could
Drink morning coffee when hungover.
I have never thought that a compromise
Can taste so good.

I didn’t want to consider different me
I thought I have lost myself with you.
I didn’t know her,
But you did.

I keep doing it to myself.
This pain is better than not having you at all.
I like having you in me,
And I’m the only one who knows it.

Calm and stress at the same time.
I need shivers to enjoy,
But of course you knew that.
You have read me, and suddenly I can’t read anymore.

Conversations in my head,
Disappointed in my own stories.
I pretend that I don’t like to be with you,
But when you’re not around, I don’t have me.

You left me dry,
Because you were dry before you met me.
I wish we had more time to get wet.

When they told me love should be easy,
They didn’t know that it is easy to walk together in the darkness.
I wish we had more time to wait for the morning,
But all we had were nights.

I keep doing it to myself
Life is loss, pain
You move on, push past it
You write subroutines to deal
To ease, to distract, to bypass
Again and again until
You are more subroutine
Than you are yourself
And you wonder
At what point did pain
Become more relevant
To life
Than living?

— The End —