People ask me often as to my beliefs,
I've honestly believed in everything.
Now we have this Matrix that scientists
subscribe to and its just as absurd.
Apparently advanced beings have discovered
the Atom Age before us and created us as an
experiment.
Its as silly as a big bang theory where one bang
created all of this. Evolution came perfectly due
to gasses in the sky and we may as well inhale those gasses
in if we believe in that fantasy. If evolution is correct, I believe there'll be far less perfection in mother nature and how does it explain perfection of the biology of so many animals and how did such randomn-ness of microcosms forming even know how each animal would come to be if there was no intelligence into the design? Even the evolution of microcosms forming over time can't explain the link to perfect evolution now, minus some mutations in each species.

Now I know most Muslims are moderate in in their beliefs like Christians so I won't go into the ****** little girls awaiting terrorists in heaven as most do not pay attention to that. If you are not brain-washed by the common media of Hysteria, you would know most muslim families are normal and even share our God. Yes, Jesus may have played a lesser role but he was still regarded as important.

Lets face it, the bible has its share of madness too, but those were prehistoric days and even the first bible was over-written by the second testament with far less blood-shed, ****** and focused much more on advance-ment of civilization.
People say God is/was ever knowing but I believe he was not, and has evolved like we have.
Even Gods can learn from their creations like how we learn from The Sims.
Did not God make a mistake with drowning the world and testing one of his disciples to such severe limits destroying his family and his crops that he said he would never do it again.
Did God not give us free will, that's a sin that even he may answer to one-day considering the evils that has gone on since Cain killed Abel or even before as Eve and Adam found lust by eating a juicy apple.
Was eating pork not considered a sin because of severe lack of hygiene unlike today and may I court controversy by saying perhaps homosexuality was for the same reasons, the risk of diseases unlike today. We shower ever day now and have a thing called condoms. I think back in the day child birth was a concern as God wanted to grow his disciples but our Planet now is of billions of people so I doubt God cares if you straight or Gay anymore.

People say Christianity is a joke, but I believe most of the Bible is of metaphors and stories invented for the bigger picture. Female was born from the rib of Adam? If you look more into it metaphorically, it's pretty much saying God gave man an equal or if you ask me, a  better half.......a woman and the focus would be of the heart.
*** is not just instinctual or we would be like dogs and cats who don't become locked on one such dog or cat for 10 minutes and move on.
Do dogs and cats suffer from unrequited love?
Once upon a time, scientists even said Dogs do not have emotions. Tell that to the dog happy as larry about to go walkies.
I'm a bundle of contradictions.

Do I believe in God?
I may swear, I may drink and do drugs but now to a lesser degree as my focus is on making up for the bridges I have burned and damage I have done. I will  never be like Ned Flanders but most Christians except for the radicalized or new born Christians who take the bible as literally as gospel are not.
In other words, I'l answer to God and before I die, try to answer to the things I have done.
Not because I want an escape clause as you can't escape based on fear of Heaven and Hell alone like the Italian Mafia who apologize each time they **** a child. Its because I can't live the way I have been living, anymore. Even demons can become angels or angels become demons. Look at Lucifer, he was once God's most beautiful of angels. As for demons becoming Angels, I'm still waiting on the third testament or to see if my demons can be forgiven.
I believe it depends on bridges I can rebuild and its not superficiality fake to face God, I wish to make up for my past.

I'll never be the Christian who goes to Church and speaks in ridiculous tongues. But I'll be the Christian who believes in God or maybe just believe in God and not try to be a Christian at all.
I need God to stop me from hurting others of an anarchy lifestyle that needs a one way street into an alleyway, smashing into the back wall.
Like I said, a bundle of Contradictions.

I over-dosed with a nose-bleed,
woke in hospital among the weeds,
barbecued and wired corpses
I keep hearing them with the voices
nights are like lightning hitting,
randomly like hail storming freaking
smashes my mind with ice blocks,
the size of jelly fish, remedies,
inject the stereo with inanities
Fishermen on acid in the docks....

A lover with a chain so anchored needs...
The worm contained with the diseases,
at the table of a first class best resort
prawns and ***** are a word for pollute
and the stables flashing of the horses
galloping when lightning comes strikin'

Where the grip releases the birds,
and helium balloons are for lease,
and tear the faces of the children
shaking their heads to trusting words.

Spinning soda top bottle,
in a ***** alley-way.
memories are buried,
in the sand ants hurried
for not but a temple.
but their scars to fodder.

Pick on me as I'm different.
To hell with assumptions
This is the ****** Internet
I feed you ******* and secrets,
lies and never glowing me
when your blackest vessel
is filled with greasy toxicity.

I kept the burning letters and the removal of x-mas trees
of my throat swallowing my child-hood naivety,
There's cars smashing where the violation exists,
the hand held to a throat trying to breathe.
Graffiti anarchy with my intoxication of eyes.
Best friends break apart unfriendly marbles
wake up dragging mats upon the carpets.
I wish I could forget and dumb my brain,
but it only drives home more the perspective,
rain drenched and wearing my favourite collar
Nothing is better hope than a dog with a bone.
I wish I could wiggly wag like my dead-on pet,
but when has the warmth of the sun's been set
single spark apart from all of my child-hood days.
I wish I could wake up and smell your essence.
To be honest, I wish to die and not bake in this flesh,
Attraction can be blinded in interpretation
Opening up as ocean whipped afflictions.
And gentle are the starfish at bottom of oceans
and bitter comes warmth sting-rays of the surface,
Earliest and the best of  sands upon the lands
crashing as uncle pulled coins from my ears.
I'll be as blinded to misery and focus on God,
Reappraisal and not loving bag of tricks,
There's no such thing as wisdom with the lambs,
and ever higher does this wall slabs bricks,
Ever loyal are loved sweet adorable dogs,
licks our faces and jumps up so quick.

Darkest roots wrap around this old cabin,
the vulnerable fragility of a breathless dragon
Shatters of star-dust flake over the tin roof,
and I wish to escape into the night sky
galloping wings & white unicorn hooves,
a freedom deliverance echoes cries.

A photo of expressive beauty,
forever in my mind,
as you undressed,
A lady who is stirringly
tauntingly
teasing
memorizing
Statue-like
lovingly
toy­ing
brushing gorgeous hair.
I met you in an exotic bar,
and now I can only be par,
At the exotic resort,
with parked
pristine cars
I can't compete with.

Any-thing,
on a beak,
regurgitated
the sickness
the swallow.....
A push of *******
to such a myth
of your gallows,
un-comforting
of a cells' pillow.


Pain hysteria
brings
rusty walls
comes
the leak
and flows comes
freezing
and
my enemies,
will bite
the bullet,
The stream
bubbling red frosts,
of wanted
criminals
below zero.

Callous of the brings
preys on weak
and wrecking *****
agonized
to the circus
of the blessed
that will obey,
A reaped
with a scythe,
festering
is the devil's
attraction
to your pre-
occupation
of God's work,
with a smirk.

*******.

******* for your tattoos,
earning you-tube points,
See that your victims.
have no point of view,
as money's breathless
and your self confessed
of guilt of reflection
upon your own inflictions
Never find the suicides
of those who are innocent,
Continue Vigilante.
Earn those golden views.

100,000 views tonight
and 24 hours are free
to all new subscribers.
His history of anarchy,
green felt exploitation
to his naive simplicity,
in his victims' eyes,
free would be brevity
if no abandoned lies
but you proved a *******.
What's hiding in his closet,
to be the Judge un-announced....
Such un-voted amateurism,
stimulation of his hypocrisy
Sleep soundly all the babies
& his contradictions....

There's acorns that drop
off from a tree,
upon this tin roof.
Reminding,
years of fleetingly
the deer's gesture
graces snow onto,
the trees over-lapping
as they dip
and raise,
upon this
haunted dear
house,
moodily,
while I try
with a greet
to ghosts I met,
to hope again....

"breath sways to our hips,
in frozen of the alps"

The question of the meaning
to life's biggest secrets,
logs in a winter holiday cabin,
Eyes carry more than wisdom,
they weigh me down with beauty.
The breaths are suddenly physically
seen in the air outside the warmest
and to the cold our tonight's.
You and I running in continuous
no end to our passionate flow,
the icy anxiety heard in the morning
a wish granted in the afterglow.

I'll never until,
this place is
another
haunting
to my corpse.

I can't give to
what I received.
You can't begin,
to see ....

There's a blood-rushed
to the doll marked places

I saw the spirits
floating,
as a child,
this home is haunted.

But they accepted me,
as one of them.

A ghost's phantom hammer
hits the old wooden boards,
a twisted grin's Chancellor
and the jury sounds an applause.

My star faded once the crystal,
once blown was the silent whistle
crucial is my own grave's shoveling,
and no doves are this day wailing.

(RGH)

The startled of frozen,
like a soul's been tasered
a bridge apart to flee,
No wild to be comforted
in homeless of the sheltered,
Mumbling back streets,
of fallacy of the demons.
Anger of a sign "no exit."
Trying but each day's wasted
in my father's shameful eyes,
I have nothing left to say,
flicking pebbles before it rains,
haphazard movement of trains,
I just wish to jump in front of in.


(Jay Jelly)

Swinging from
My pendulum
Pressure cooker
Held my breath
It almost buried me
Wiping sweat
From my brow
Deceived by the notions
The lacking of understanding
What’s two feet in front of me
Miscellaneous calculations
Backfired

(RGH)

The start of misery,
a child's woken ears
to hairy situation
of startled fears.
I'll barely consciously
swipe & to weep
in ****** of history.

I whispered my secrets
to darkness of demons,
became my possession
and my repressions
Anger was silence,
and peace was a fleet,
bobbing up in the bay,
and I vision it to this day.

(Jay Jelly)

Bottoms up
Even the chaos
Can speak
A striking
Resemblance shows face
Quieter clusters similar
Cut the
Umbilical cord
Like an umbrella
Drowned out at sea
Music box
Priceless inheritance
Yet the gold is rusting
Reprinting making anew
The fraudulent tones
Fading harmony
Fallen star
Not far behind
The distance between
You can’t fathom
Losing my reality
Swinging from
My pendulum
Pressure cooker
I held my breath to long
It almost buried me
Wiping sweat
From my brow
Deceived by the notions
The lacking of understanding
What’s two feet in front of me
Miscellaneous acquaintances
Mis calculations
Add up
Backfired in a positive light
Patiently awaiting a revival

My father,
told me,
he loves me so much,
this was in days
generally,
I was the pride,
and now the dead
beating.
I'm the rat poisoning
the diseased,
disenchanted
and he won't
look me in the eyes.

Let me ask you father,
the acrimoniously
of your now numb
preemptively
but with no
authority,
You gave in,
a baby
once held
to your skin.