A personable person propogated passion
Beneath my heavy heart
Alas, cried the caterpillar
You are not dead!
Though I have spent hours molesting your windowsill
Rapeseed!
Huckleberry!
Gingerbread Pie!
All these things and more have I maliciously misunderstood
But the lies of the soothsayer are frequently true
They are passionate pomegranates from me to you
The obelisks of oppression overpower your heartstrings
And there's nothing you can do

My villain!
My thief!
The princess of my misery!
The fiery orb and the blasphemous pirates!
Staring at your shoulders I see only my reflection
Turning on your heel my eyelids sparkle and linger at your doorstep

It's Goliath's head
Salmon and bread
Those deathly ideas which you purposely said
Tic tac guru
Just what is he to you?
And which of my words have you read?

I'm cold.
And I'm tired.
And I'm so done.
Of being the only one.
Trying.

I'm alone.
And unprepared.
And so over being dragged along.
Of being the one that must be strong.
I'm weak.

Why?
Why is it me?
Why do I do for you,
But not me, too.

And you let me,
You let me **** myself.
You let me go through trials,
Guess you haven't cared for a while.

You say:
"I shouldn't put,
you through my pains"
But I guess it's all the same.
To you.

I do remember,
A beautiful time.
When I was yous,
And you were mine.

But it's not that simple.
It's not easy.
Because you're killing me.
So slowly.

Black sketches in my minds eye.
Ink flows into rain, clouds, crows.

A pen my hand won’t hold,
A line my soul won’t write.

An artist eye looks out of my scarred face.
The beating of the rain clutches at me
With hands of stick figures and dust.

I am stilled.
I am stopped.
I am half of me.

The inky black crow flies on
Leaving my eye smudged, and longing.

I sit here wondering
Am I making the right decision?
Can I know?
Until I take the leap can I ever really know?
It won't be easy,
I never said it would.
It will make enemies and will tax my friends,
But I gotta go.
I gotta take my leap to
FREEDOM.

I've gotta live a life.

From before the gravel
ground too deep
From before a year
crunched beneath my feet
and sighed,
I can't remember what you said.
Now it's gone,
soaked with another man's
words pretending to be mine
and thrown out with the newspaper.

Raining. Broke. Cold.
Browsing Craigslist jobs.
"Experienced Window Washer Needed"?
****; underqualified.
Rain is unsympathetic.
Shouldn't expect different.
Rain has washed a lot of windows.

I awake to the midnight morning

of sleepwalking



the thumping of my soul deep in the

morning twilight



children slumber under their

dark covers as I emerge



from dreams of hope and despair

under my bittersweet tongue



their slumber

and mine



expectant and hopeful

anxiety ridden in our own way



blessed am I to unfold

during the AM hours



of morning radio

cold floors and



oil black

coffee of the watchman’s variety



alive to hear my strange thoughts

and my children safe but for a moment



as I sleepwalk

in darkness