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122 · Nov 2021
Always Torturing Me
Sarah Spencer Nov 2021
Do you like her more
because she's more talkative?
Because she comes as blunt as a pencil
but with words that stab like a knife?
Do I need to change
in order for you to like me?

Because I know when you look at me all you see
is someone who is not her.
Someone that is not worth your affection and time.

Your actions stab me like a knife.
Stab.
when I saw you two walking together.
Stab.
when I heard you tell her she was beautiful.
Stab.
When I smelled the remnants of her perfume on you.

You're killing me slowly,
never hitting a major artery,
always torturing me.
121 · Dec 2021
A Penny For Your Thoughts
Sarah Spencer Dec 2021
If they say you get
a penny for your thoughts
wouldn't I be a millionaire by now?
I tend to think a little too muchXD
121 · Oct 2019
Learning to Love
Sarah Spencer Oct 2019
I can't do this
I can't block her out
I can't ignore what could just be a rumor
I can't stay silent
I cant

Please don't leave me
please just listen
please deny what they say
please just believe me
please

I'll learn to love you
I'll learn to not stray
I'll learn to like guys
I'll learn from my mistakes
I'll learn

I will be honest
I will stay with you
I will let you own me
I will make myself be happy
I will

I promise
121 · Mar 2022
Rapunzel
Sarah Spencer Mar 2022
Whenever I sit and ponder upon my life
I can always count on fairy tales,
on princesses.
But no, I'm not talking about all the
glitz and glamour and happy endings
most people imagine,
I think of the little things,
of how jealous I am of Cinderella.
And no, I could care less
about her prince or fairy godmother,
all I care about is the ball,
of how Cinderella got it all.
Cinderella at least got
to stay out till midnight,
when my ball came around,
when prom came around,
I was never even allowed to attend,
I never get the chance
to see the twinkling lights
or the dresses long enough to trip over,
I'd never dance till my legs turned to jelly,
or walk in with the love of my life,
no, I'd never even be there long enough
to drop my glass slipper.
I will never have till midnight,
all I'll ever have are four walls to stare at
under the surveillance of my strict parents,
I'll never be a Cinderella,
I'll only ever be a Rapunzel,
locked up in a tower,
waiting on a prince to save me
that will never come.
Don't know if this poem is trash. This poem is just me. I guess it's up to you to decide that for yourself.
120 · Nov 2021
I'm A Monster
Sarah Spencer Nov 2021
There's a monster that lurks in the shadows
waiting for the right moment to strike,
so it can dig its fangs into a human,
tear its flesh limb from limb.
It'll wait as long as it takes
if it means it can take the time
to savor the ****
and quench its thirst for blood.

I'll lurk in the shadows
and wait for the right opportunity
to rob you of your humanity.
I'll lie, cheat, and steal
to cover up my crimes.
I don't care if I ruin your life
as long as your downfall benefits mine.
Am I really any different from the monster?
Sometimes I wonder if I'm real
120 · Jan 2022
The Size of My Heart
Sarah Spencer Jan 2022
I've given up on boys.
I'm tired of being treated
like a toy that is only played
with once on Christmas day.

I'm tired of being seen
only for my body,
like I'm not a person
with a brain.
I'm not just something to be obtained

I'm the person
who lifts you up when you're down,
who will always want you around,
who will keep your secrets,
who isn't afraid to see you at your weakest.

I'm tired of being seen for the size of my parts.
Why can't you just see the size of my heart?
I swear I'm not a feminist. I'm just tired of being seen and treated this way. It's not fair. Nothings fair!!!!
120 · Apr 2022
When I Die
Sarah Spencer Apr 2022
When I die
I don't want to be buried.
Set my physical body ablaze
the same way my soul
will be burning in hell,
carry me to the top
of the highest cliff overlooking the ocean
so I can see the breeze ruffling
the fabric of your sunshine dress.
And then you'll sit beside me one last time
and whisper you're deepest darkest secrets,
your fears, your dreams,
because you know I no longer have a mouth
to tell anyone these things.
Tell me of the places we never went,
the sights we'd never see,
those memories so bittersweet,
and finally, when the sun sets
and the time feels right,
pop open my lid,
set me free,
watch me fly
the same way I flew off that bridge
some summer nights ago
when the wind was in my head.
I'll relay my regrets
as I fall towards the frothing waves
and the gaping jaws of the rocks below,
the black, murky depths
and the hands of Satan
reaching out to greet me,
the dying light of your sunshine dress
the last thing that I see.
119 · Mar 2022
We'll Carry On
Sarah Spencer Mar 2022
We'll carry on
when all is gone,
charging strong
into the dawn.
119 · Dec 2021
Stuck Between the Seasons
Sarah Spencer Dec 2021
even though I'm almost 18
I still see the world through
the eyes of a child.

Soon I'll go off to college
and pull out my hair
trying to pay the bills,
but just for one moment,
while I'm still on the border
of adolescent and adult,
I want to do the things I used to do.

I want to rewind time to winter
where there was a mug of hot chocolate
waiting for me on the kitchen table
after hours of making angels in the snow.

I want to travel back to spring
where I'd race my bikes
with the neighborhood kids,
splashing through puddles and
spouting out elementary insults
and feeling on top of the world.

I want to go back summers ago
where I giggled under the dying light
as I caught fireflies in plastic containers
and danced in the dark green grass.

I want to go back to fall
where I would sit on the couch
cowering over horror movies,
burying my face into a blanket whenever
the scary parts came on the screen,
because I wanted to feel like a big girl.

And now that I'm nearly a big girl,
whose stuck between the seasons,
I know I no longer want to be one.
That I wish I would have stayed
within those younger years
just a little longer.
119 · Aug 2023
Stressed Out
Sarah Spencer Aug 2023
I'm so stressed out
I can barely breathe,
because all these problems
keep pressing on me,
there's this ache in my heart
that tells me to try,
when every path has a problem
no matter how hard I pry.
I'm ****** no matter what I decide.
117 · Jan 2022
I Have Lived
Sarah Spencer Jan 2022
I have loved and I have lost
I have laughed and I have cried
I have created and I have destroyed
I have lived... and now I must die
117 · Jan 2022
Love is Evergreen
Sarah Spencer Jan 2022
Love is evergreen.
No matter how much you
want it to wilt like a flower,
It will always find a way
to grow back again.
116 · Jan 2022
My Only Escape
Sarah Spencer Jan 2022
This place is a home
even though it doesn't have walls.
It's the place I can run to
when the demons won't
stop swirling in my head
like a tornado turning the wrong way.
It's the place I can shelter from the storm
even though there is no roof to keep me warm.
It's fate that I came across this place.
No matter how long I stray away
I always come back.
I'm drawn to this place like a moth to light,
like a phene to nicotine.
Hell, I'd probably be dead in a ditch today
if this place hadn't of let me stay
where I won't freeze to death,
where I don't have to fight the thoughts in my head,
where I am sure I'll be safe.
I'll always be thankful for this place,
because it's my one and only escape.
Hello Poetry is my escape. Thank you to the people who created this place!!!
115 · Sep 2018
Your Words Hurt
Sarah Spencer Sep 2018
You just want to ****
my spirit for the thrill
of the game
and the adrenaline in your veins

You don't care about the thoughts
racing through my mind
or the wars fought
to keep my heart off the grind

The whispers over my shoulder
have made me older
when I'm still too young
to have winded lungs

Yet I'm choking, can't breathe
as I stare at the storm before
my eyes, every word hung in seethe,
For how could one already be so **** sore?
115 · Mar 2021
Jacket
Sarah Spencer Mar 2021
I'm wearing your jacket,
breathing you in,
feeling the places where your bare skin has touched,
Imagining your arms around me.

Yet as he sees me do these things,
sees that I'm obviously taken,
he still pulls me close
and wraps his arms around me.
Don't know if anyone will understand what I'm going for here.
115 · Nov 2021
Do the World a Favor
Sarah Spencer Nov 2021
I want you dead.
That thought constantly crawling in my head.
I have never hated anybody
until the day you laid eyes on me.

From my first day of life
you've caused me nothing but strife.
You've always been there,
but I know you don't care.
All you've done is chain me down.
You say you love me, but you want me to drown.

You hit me and you mock me,
you take away my ecstasy.
I'm constantly looking behind my back,
afraid, if I step wrong, I'll get smacked.

I hate you so much
I shiver at even your touch
or the sound of your booming voice.
Oh, If you died I'd rejoice
and the angels would sing from heaven!

Sometimes I feel driven
to do the world a favor.
Hell, if I was braver
I would have fulfilled this very vision.

That is, if I wouldn't go to prison...
This sounds like a rap song so I'm sorry<3
Sarah Spencer Sep 2021
I know this sounds stupid.
I know to you it's second nature,
but I'm gonna thank you anyways.
Thank you for being the
only boy in history,
whose ever kissed me,
who hasn't tried
to put a hand up my shirt.
When the only person you've ever dated only wanted you for your body and what you could "give" to them, you start to think all men are like that. Though there are a lot of men who do expect these things from females, there are decent guys out there if you know where to look. My new boyfriend gives me hope for the male gender. I thank him so much for that.
114 · Feb 2022
Number 4
Sarah Spencer Feb 2022
On a scale of 1 to 10
they say I'm a 4,
below average.
If I got a 4 out of 10 on a test
I'd be failing with an F.
Yet when it comes to smarts,
I get straight A's in school,
perfect 10's on every paper.
But nobody ever sees the smart girl
all they see is the ugly 4.
I'll never be more than just a number...
114 · Mar 2022
Moon
Sarah Spencer Mar 2022
We'll see the same moon
when you watch from your window.
Sit and remember me,
soak in our memories
till you taste those tears so bittersweet.
But do not stay sad,
instead stretch a smile
and be happy that I was your's
and you were mine,
even if it was only for a short time,
if we share the same moon
we'll both be fine.
I will find my way back to you,
when the sun sets
it doesn't go away forever,
but comes back just as beautiful as before
as a blazing sunrise.
So for now look to the moon,
I will be back soon,
I will find my way back to you.
I promise.
I will be giving this poem to someone very special to me:) <3
Sarah Spencer Jan 2022
"Do you think he's hot?"
a girl said to me, pushing her phone in my face.
The picture was of a guy standing in the mirror,
his shirt off and his hair tugged up with product,
the type of guy girls would worship.
"No," ​I said, because I didn't like lying to people.
"He's not my type."
The girl  just shrugged me off and turned to
show the picture to the girl next to me.
But little did that girl know
that while she was worshiping the guy on her screen,
I was busy worshiping the girl next to me.
I think I might be a little gay..
I am gay...pansexual actually. I just realized I don't have any poems that are aimed at lgbtq people. Thought I minds well post one. If even one person can relate. I'll be happy<3
113 · Dec 2021
Inside My Mind
Sarah Spencer Dec 2021
I'll never be able
to count the stars in the sky,
just like I'll never be able
to make you love me.
I would sell my soul
and spend an eternity in hell
just to spend a single second with you
in your arms
in your head
in your heart
Sometimes I wish I could
cast a spell on you
and make you love me
so that you could be
in my brain
in my body
in my life
But I know no matter how often
I open my eyes
the only place we'll ever be together
is inside my mind.
Is this poem good? i have no clue. I'm just a high school girl who plays around with poems in her free time. If you're looking for good poetry I'm not the person to go to.
113 · Mar 2022
Empty Shell
Sarah Spencer Mar 2022
I've lost everyone
and everything I love,
I've been broken down,
I'm nothing but an empty shell.
This place is purgatory,
I'd rather be in hell,
at least then the blazing flames
would make me feel something
even if all I felt was pain,
because right now
I'm nothing but an empty shell
that feels nothing for nobody.
random poem that has affected my mood for a while.
113 · Apr 2022
The Most Beautiful Thing
Sarah Spencer Apr 2022
I've always been able to admire
those girls that can go about their day
without caking concealer on their face,
those girls that wake up in the morning
and look in the mirror
and smile at each of their imperfections
as if they were beauty marks.
And when I see that same girl
walking down the street,
I can't help but smile,
because that girl decided
to block out the screams of society
and love herself despite her flaws.
That, to me, is the most beautiful thing.
113 · Feb 2022
Neverland
Sarah Spencer Feb 2022
Tonight we are young,
but, tomorrow, we better run.
Because tomorrow brings another day,
and these growing pains won't go away.
So we'll run away from this barren land,
hand in hand, we'll fly to Neverland.
I don't care what we get into,
because my heart's at home when I'm with you.
113 · Sep 2021
Should I?
Sarah Spencer Sep 2021
knife tracing over my veins,
blue green against paper skin
the paths, the new beginnings
I could have followed
had I chosen to.

My heart racing
like it's running a marathon,
my head crackling
like an old t.v

Only one thought pops
into my mind,
piercing through the white noise,
through the free flowing tears.
Should I?
112 · Dec 2021
First Time
Sarah Spencer Dec 2021
As we stared down at my bed,
the unrumpled sheets military made
awful thoughts ran though my head
and refused to fade away.
We took off each other's clothes,
my hands shaking like leaves
and right before he laid me down I froze
"I don't think I can do it," I breathed.
And that's when he pulled me in close,
our bodies throbbing with heat,
and that's when I realized I loved him the most,
that he was the one that made me complete.
And as he gently lowered me onto the sheets
the fears I had felt began to retreat...
I don't know if this poem will make people feel uncomfortable but I've been wanting to write something like this for awhile so I stopped caring. My first time is such a beautiful moment that I keep close to me and I wanted to write down my experience as it happened...
112 · Jan 2019
True
Sarah Spencer Jan 2019
I know you cant see me
im nothing to you
I just wish you could be
for once something true
do you have to lie
even to the ones you love
will you even try
to be something proud of?
112 · Dec 2021
Falling in Love
Sarah Spencer Dec 2021
When I fall in love,
I fall hard.
Flat on my face,
scraping both knees,
scuffing both hands.
And no,
I'm not gonna need a band aid
I'm gonna need stitches,
I'm gonna have scars.
I guess that's what I get
for falling so hard.
To all the people I've written love poems to on here over the last four years: Michael, Anthony, Elizabeth, Robert, and Trever. This poem is for youXD
Sarah Spencer Sep 2021
They say if you love someone
set them free,
but where does that
leave me?
Am I never allowed
to be selfish?
All give and no take,
I'm pretty selfless.

I've given you my heart but I cant have
yours in return?
Now that stings, I'll even admit
that it burns
If I cant even have something as
simple as that,
then where do I draw
the line at?
When will I finally show you
out the door?

What am I even fighting for
anymore?!
111 · Feb 2022
Raindrops
Sarah Spencer Feb 2022
Sometimes I look outside
while it's raining rampant
and remember the simple times
when I used to believe
you could dodge the raindrops
and not get wet
if you were fast enough,
or how I used to race the raindrops
as they slid down the window
when I was stuck inside
for the day to play instead.
Those were the little things I worried about as a kid.
Now I worry about
what I'm gonna do after high school
when I'm thrown out into the world,
or if I'll be lucky enough to have someone
want to settle down and start a family with me,
or if I'll even make a big enough mark
for at least one person
to remember me by when I die.
And since I can't rewind my life,
I'm stuck staring out the window at the raindrops
to remember those memories
that can only be found from childhood.
Just thought it again while
111 · Feb 2022
Good Enough
Sarah Spencer Feb 2022
You're an achiever,
a go-getter.
You grab the world by the horns,
you direct the ocean waves
you can do anything,
have anything you want.
That's just a part of who you are,
always needing more,
constantly starving
and striving to be
stronger and braver and smarter,
which is why I'll never be
good enough for you.
111 · Jan 2022
Music. Is. Life.
Sarah Spencer Jan 2022
Headphones in my ears,

tuning the world to white noise,

turning off my senses.

All that matters is the beat,

pumping blood into my veins,

breathing a clear calm into

this instrument of a body.

Music. Is. Life
111 · Sep 2018
Silver Wings
Sarah Spencer Sep 2018
The brown eyed girl
believed she was nothing but a defect
but I believe she just hasn't begun to unfurl
her own set of silver wings yet

heart of sunshine
laughter of wind chime

she is beautiful
brown eyes so full and bright
her smile that will never dull
has showered everyone in her light

full of brains
no refrain

one day she won't need me to sew her wings
and she'll fly to history
leave a burn if anything
hand in hand with me.
111 · Jan 2022
Everyday Angel
Sarah Spencer Jan 2022
Only I could see her halo
and its heather hinted glow
as she pushed a cart down aisle eight
and selected a sack of seedless grapes.

I bet her voice sounds smooth like a lullaby,
I bet she bears wings that take her to the sky.
But I'll never know if she really is an angel,
because girls like her don't dance with devils.
Random thoughts led to this poem.what started out as a poem about my gf turned into something with an entirely different meaning. And god, I need to stop coming on here so much. I need to get a life...
109 · Feb 2022
I Have Nothing
Sarah Spencer Feb 2022
They say you don't know
what you're missing
until it's gone.
Except when I lost her,
it made me realize
that I have nothing.
I'm walking this road alone,
but the wind isn't at my back,
and when I reach my destination
there will be no one to meet me
in an embrace that makes
living this life worth it.
Sometimes thoughts like these really make me wonder if suicide is really such a bad option
Sarah Spencer Aug 2021
I think I kinda sorta like you
at least that's what I think
I can't even look at you
without turning pink

You're out of my league
I'm trying to touch the stars
trying to pursue you
will only leave scars

I think I kinda sorta like you
you're the only one who gets me
when our hearts beat together
I feel casual and carefree

It's probably just a faze
In a few days this will end
I really need to stop this
I do have a boyfriend

But I think I kinda sorta love you...
Sarah Spencer Oct 2021
You handcuff me to you
and hover over me,
waiting for me to make a mistake
so you can correct me and say
"I told you so."

You love me too much.
I hate you for that.
Most kids my age grew up without
both parents by their side
and make sure to remind me of
how lucky I am.
How they have it worse.

But do they have an alcoholic, abusive dad?
Do they have to stress
because they're held to a higher standard
than everyone else?
Do they have to sit out from every social event
because their parents are afraid that if they
give them a leash they'll take mile?

Maybe I'm just an ungrateful spoiled brat
or maybe they just don't wanna believe
that the grass isn't always greener
on the other side.
105 · Sep 2019
Oblivion
Sarah Spencer Sep 2019
sixth-period algebra
front row
left side seat
brown hair
black glasses
bright smile

Did you know?

that she sat next to you
the whole year

Did you know?

about the hidden moments we
were together

Did you know?

how her hand fit
with mine

Did you know?

that I sometimes wish I were with her
instead of you

You didn't know?!

well now you do
104 · Dec 2021
I Never Said I Was Brave
Sarah Spencer Dec 2021
They say the truth sets you free,
but it only puts me in chains,
roots me like a tree
no matter what society claims.

Sometimes I start thinking
What if I had lied?
Would I still be sitting here sinking?
Would you not have cried?

Sometimes some things
should be taken to the grave.
Because the truth hurts, it stings.
I never said I was brave...
I've been going through nothing but pain for the last two months all because I told the truth. I thought I was going to be rewarded for doing the right thing. I couldn't have been more wrong. I'm done telling people the truth.
104 · May 2021
17
Sarah Spencer May 2021
17
our clothes flung to the floor
my bedsheets rumpled
our hearts racing
my hands shaking

Our bodies intertwined
his voice soft
our awkward laughs
his hungry gaze

our fumbling fingers
my hushed moans
our love shining
his beautiful smile
103 · Dec 2021
Self Love
Sarah Spencer Dec 2021
Self love.
Something I'm incapable of.

I'm like a jigsaw puzzle,
I'm worthless without others
surrounding me.
Others who make me look more
interesting, and kinder, and funnier
than I really am.

Because deep down I'm
a scared little girl with eyes
so wide you can see the whites.
A naive little girl who
falls in love and
gets trapped like a fly
stuck in a spider's web.
A brat of a little girl who is
too ignorant and too quick
to question and judge others.

Self love.
Something I will never be capable of.
Because I will never accept
the person I really am.

Because I despise myself more
than I despise my worst enemy
Just a random crap poem that's been sitting in my drafts for too long
Sarah Spencer Dec 2021
I wish there was a parallel universe
where I could have you.
Where I could wake up next to you
and be the happiest person alive.
Where you and I could be together
out on the town, the night lights
radiating your imperfections that
I've come to love so much.
Where I could sit you down
to meet my parents
and see their faces shining with pride
because their daughter is dating someone
rich in love instead of wealth.
Where we could hold hands
and walk down the street
without the world telling us we're wrong.

I know I would find it fun to live a different life,
but really I just wish there was a parallel universe
so that I could make you happy.
Sarah Spencer Aug 2021
"I wish you didn't exist," he texted.
Even though I was unable to see his face
unable to see his eyebrows smushed together
to hear the frost in his voice
I knew he meant it.
He always meant these sorts of things

"Stupid."
"Annoying."
"*****."
"*****."

I've tried for almost as long as I can remember
to let those words bounce off of me
to walk through the fire
and still come out unscathed
but after awhile "*****"
starts to sound like "Babe"
and "I hate you"
sounds similar to
"I love you"

I've agreed with every word
that's ever came out of his mouth
memorized it,
written it down,
taken it to heart
so he wouldn't tower over me
belittle me
so he would stop just long enough-
so I could catch my breath

So when he said, "I wish you didn't exist"
I responded with,
"What do you think my headstone should say?"
Actually I already have it all planned out. I want my headstone to say, "She  was a girl who only spoke in poems."
102 · Dec 2021
You're All I Need
Sarah Spencer Dec 2021
I want to be the type of person
who inspires others,
who has people look up to me
like I look up to my idols.
I want to be the type of person
who picks people up
when they're down
and looking to the ground.
I want to be the type of person
who can be depended on
and is like a rock
for those who are crumbling.
I want to be the type of person
who does the right things
and who has a good sense
of judgment and justice.
I want to be the type of person
who is loved
and won't hesitate
to give love where there is loss.
But most of all
I want to be the type of person
who you love
because you are all that I need to be happy
and when I'm around you
I don't have to be anybody but myself.
I wish there was someone in the world like that...
102 · Aug 2021
My Life Quote
Sarah Spencer Aug 2021
"You can't love someone who never had a heart to begin with"
Please stop pursuing people who aren't ever going to love you back. Believe me, I feel you I found out the hard way
Sarah Spencer Dec 2021
I want to talk to you
but I can't.

It would be too awkward
with the looming elephant
in the room,
the thing that divided us
like the sun and the moon.

The chasm between us is only widening
with each passing day
because I find it frightening
just to look you in the eye
because of the things I've done.

And because of my mistakes
I am no longer the one
who gets to hold you tight.
I'm the reason
that I sleep alone at night...
I haven't done any sort of rhyming poem in a while so thought I'd try again. I'm pretty rusty at it so I'm sorryXD
102 · Apr 2022
This World Feels Too Small
Sarah Spencer Apr 2022
This world feels too small
even though there are seven continents
and five, frothing oceans,
maybe I just feel small
because people today don't touch
each other's hearts the way they used to,
instead, we go through every social setting
without so much as sharing a smile with another,
we no longer lift each other up
when we feel sad or lonely or small,
we just sit and stare down at our phones,
no, that's not loving at all,
that's just lonely,
and that's the last thing I want to be.
102 · Apr 2022
Let You Down
Sarah Spencer Apr 2022
I'm afraid of letting you down,
my voice is sore, my hands are shaking
and my thoughts are screaming  way too loud.
I've tried so hard, I tried my best
and now I'm being put to the test.
Hours of practice just to make you proud,
but what if I let you down?
101 · Nov 2021
Jeez...
Sarah Spencer Nov 2021
On the verge of tears.
I never cry in front of people.
I haven't in years.

But then there was you
who didn't know
when to let things go.
Then there was you
who continued to poke the stick
at the bear
like it'd do the trick,
like it'd make me feel better
instead of under the weather.

Every time people pry
I cry.
I explode,
going full throttle
down the wrong road.

Then you wonder why I'm upset
when you were the one who wouldn't let
me be in peace.
Jeez...
Sarah Spencer Jan 2022
When you broke up with me
I would listen to Olivia Rodrigo on repeat.
I listened to her lyrics
as if they were the Bible
because she was the only one
who knew what I was feeling.
And though I've moved on,
hearing her songs still bring me to tears
because my heart still remembers
the way my voice rose
when I begged for you back
over and
over and
over again.
My heart still remembers the days
I was too afraid to face my friends
who wanted you dead
or the nights I spent crying
because you weren't there to comfort me.
And even though you've told yourself to forget
those times we tenderly shared,
I know my heart will always remember.
Because I will always play those same **** songs
over and
over and
over again.
I seriously do this every day. It's driving me crazy.
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