Blue eyes** serpent. The devil dressed in sinister clothing. Carve my heart, and it was bleeding in his hand. Lust swirled over head, passion laced on a sinful seduction.
A voice of reason, lost in his twisted words of appeal. I wanted his painful kiss, with my tongue scraping a razor blade deal.
His abuse is all knowing but only in the way of  his desire.

Blue eyes demon; how I let you use me. Twisted and scorned by a hand of Hell; till there was nothing left but a wayward vessel. All of the memory's of our sweet serenity, gone and filled with angsty longevity .
How do I continue forth?
Walking this path of broken and cracked pavement.
I died a thousand times, watching you at the other end of the knife. If only you could see the blood on your hands.
I wanted to heal you. I wanted to feel you. I wanted to be closer to the time when you could finally see me.

Blue eyes, it's time for goodbye. You may still hold my beating heart, but alas I'm the one living and moving on.

There is a lesson to be learned here. Maybe even a few.

I've been so angry.
So angry, I fear I might lunge at myself. My reflection shattering into a million peices, with the shards lodged in my chest. Churning and turning.

I've lost sight on things that should never, ever be misplaced. My heart on my sleeve, snipped away from a fraying string.

Know this: A man with out his heart is worse than a lion missing his courage. The fates takening, so where is the wizard to give back what I've lost?

There is no golden road to follow... Nothing but a ****** river to cross over on.
But where do we walk, when all the bridges have been burnt?

A lesson. A lesson to be learned.

Where do you go after the wolfs destroys your house, blown your stick home to the ground? Either in his belly or ****** and broken on the ground.

A lesson. A lesson to learn.

Never trust what you can not see, taste or hear... Then again, it's just not wise to trust anyone at all.

I see you. Standing there, a distinct shape in the shadows. I see you, watching me. The mystique **** of your eyes dancing over my flesh.

I fear not the power of your gaze.
Until I find myself cowering in that parallel universe of backwards mazes.
Left as a child to discover a door to her rusting cage.

I see you as I'm (not) cowering.  The vision of a man with  blue eyes on fire.

I don't want to wake this night.
Your face memorized behind my eyes.
A lie lingering into a sense of validity.

There is no you,
but within here.
Within the walls of my mind.
I can see you.
I can feel you.

You're alive.

I don't want to let this go.

Day light peaking through the cracks now,
and I'm pleading with the Lady of the Morning to delay her rise.

If only I could reverse time,
Just a second in the past.
A moment longer just to trace your face.

A sweet serenity laying in my bed.
Touching false reality in dreams of efflorescence.

I know I should wake,
but no...
Please not this time.

Just stay with me, a moment longer.
Tell me, everything will be alright..
I don't want to let you go.
Never let me go.

I hate this feeling of dread creepin through my soul. There is no reason, other then I'm falling off the edge into shallow waters.

I am not a pleasant person, or even really all that nice.
Instead imagine me as the broken glass you backed over and now are left with a flat tire.
The one black sock in your load of whites, staining the fabric in shame.
That annoying buzzing in your ear that never goes away.
The wall you stubbed your toe on in the middle of the night and screamed, "*******!"

I am not a Sunday morning
or even
a Friday night's lay.
I'm a Monday, 5PM traffic hour just waiting to flip you the bird.
I am the gum on the sidewalk which you happened to step in.
I'm a disaster.
A train wreck.
The red stain on existence, that won't ever come out.

I'll never will be any thing like, a simple smile. Or even a timeless wonder.

I am the darkness that dances in the light.

I am me.
Unpleasant and really not that nice.

My heart has many rooms,
I occupy but a few.
The rest go unvisited.
Till the light began to flicker on
and I've discovered a new part of me.
Take my hand,
lead me through the mazes of hallways.
Show me the rooms,
I've constructed for you.
Inhabit it.
Feed it with your passion of life.
Till my heart is lit ablaze from it.
Light each room with your warmth.

Make my heart into our home.

The ache is deep inside. There, just where your knife resides. Didn't I beg for your mercy? My throat screamed raw from wailing for my surrender. A barbaric answer, I did receive. Your concealed dagger buried within my left side. I stumbled and fell to the ground and watched you walk away, with a whoosh of your dark cloak. My vision blurred within deaths grasp. Left to bleed on the cold granite. Pale-white stone smeared amber. Oh, God. That awful color.

I couldn't help it my love, even with your fervent betrayal lain open and exposed. My waning eyes traced each strand of your ebony hair as the manic winds whipped them around your unhinged-grin.

"What a vision you are, my god." I whispered my ****** words staining my teeth.

You glanced back then, with the greenest of green eyes. A swirling ball of chaos with a deadly smile. The gold of your curving helmet reflecting; what could have been; what should have been between us. You looked back at me, right before you vanished in your clouds of illusions and smoke.

"I worshiped you..." I spoke to the dissipating air where you stood.

My god. My king. My lover. My killer.

"--and I trusted you." An empty echo of words ringing truth within my ears.
My time is fading in this realm. I am merely a red smudge on the ground. I question myself as I drown, lost in my sea of blood.
'How did I ever come to trust a deity of mischief and lies?'

I love a boy.

From the moment we met,
I've been falling
and
I still haven't touched the ground,
three years later.

I love this boy

With all my heart.
From his blue eyes
and
Right down to his soul.

I'm in love with my boy.

His smile captivates me.
Two matching dimples,
pinching his cheeks.

I love him
because he's my child.
I love him
because he's my son.

We all dance to the beat of a drum.
Our rhythm of life.
The sound, the pattern...
pounding within our chest.

We live,
we breath,

Spending our whole life,
looking for a certain cadence.
A beat to match our pulse.
It isn't until our hearts merge
that the pattern turns into a song.

A measure of first love,
the tempo of a kiss.
Flowing together in a musical harmony.

We dance,

Whistling together,
the sweet tune of ours.
A movement of passion,
the melody of marriage.

and we die

Changed forever,
as the song fades out.
Our souls made music together.
One, epic ballot.

I wish, wishfully to wish a wishful wish.

I don't know your name, but I can feel you in my chest.

I don't know your face, but I know of your light as it shines from within me.

I don't know the time, nor the place where I will meet you, but I know it will happen someday.

As the sun rises in the east and sets in the west.
Know: I will be waiting for you.

I walk this earth to learn the meaning of existence.
My toes digging into the sand, so I might attain the therapeutic knowledge of warmth purging my soul.

Two hands.
One to the right, achieving the greatest passions of life
The other in the wrong, a heavy burden in my left palm.

My blue eyes can see the path laid out in front of me.
(Paved in bronze, silver and gold.)

Bronze of my past,
Silver of my present
Gold of my future.

I walk the cobblestone path.
A journey of many colors without an inking of what might lay before me.
Still I press on,
walking this earth
as I count my blessings one by one.

I see you.
I see you for what you are.
I see the hate and the self betrayal.
I see the lies of a life that was never to be yours.
I see a devil inside you, dancing beneath the pale moonlight.

I love you.
I love you even though its wrong.
I love you through the pain and deceit.
I love you with every bone within this decaying body.
I love you, even though I know you killed me with a smile on your lips.

I lie here.
I lie here in my hole.
I lie here in my hole with no name at all.
I lie here because you put me here in my bed of dirt.
I lie here with the hands of a devil around my throat.

I see you; don't you see me?

I love you; will you love me?

I lie here; wont you come into my bed and rest your head?

“I’m here for you. Where ever you need me. I there.”

I smiled up and held his glistening stare. I realized then and there, his eyes weren't dark brown like I’d previously thought but instead a deep ocean blue. So blue they were the color of the black night sky.

There once was a time I would have cared.
Would've got down on my knees to make you see.
Cut my veins, just so you wouldn't flee.

So much, I would've done for you.
All you had to do was ask and I would've been there for thee.

I would've done anything before I realized the truth.
The toll that had to paid.
My soul, tarnished in lies of untold truths.

I would have. I should have.

But it's all gone away.

This poison is intoxicating. A drug sending you into the oblivion. Enraptured by the taste and the feeling of impeccable deliverance. It's just what the doctor order, a spoonful of laced sugar. A placebo effect with nothing but the risk of cancer eating away your insides. Green in color, like the skin beneath the coating of a candy apple. It enters your system like a rock through a glass window. Shattering reality, while constructing a world of make believe.  

This addiction is poisoning. An intoxication crawling inside her veins. The ever present itching there just below the girls pale skin. Waiting for her next fix.

One more hit...
Just one more.
O'please, give me more.
More;
more;
more;

This poison is blinding, an addiction of the soul. The disorder of the weak mind, with nothing else to hide.

One more hit...
Just one more.
O'please, give me more.
More;
more;
more...

I'm just done.
Today was lame.
It being never ending.
So, I am finished.
No more.
The end.
Goodbye.
Glad it's over.
Never to experience it again.

Too much ******* from everyone.
Nothing wanted to work.
A screaming grumpy kid.
With copious amount of lack of sleep.

I am just done.

This isn't a cry for help.
or me begging for attention.

I am just done with today.

Her skin was warm and smooth, with her face burrowing into the arch of my shoulder. It felt nice… Almost like an actual home coming…

That thought made me open my eyes I hadn't noticed I’d closed. My cheek pressing into the crown of yellow-hair which smelled of sweet shampoo and something purely Lillian's. It was comforting… With my nose touching the crest of her head, I inhaled that unique scent. *Like a freshly creased book, blowing on an oceans breeze.

I regret.
I told you to go
and then you listen to me.

You went and I thought, "Maybe this is for the best. This is how I get over you"

I regret.
And it hurts so bad,
watching the two of you so in love.

I regret.
That moment in time.
When I didn't tell you, "I'm in love with you."

Tell me about the world through my dreams... A green meadow blowing on the breeze of your sneeze.
The blue river flows within a see through view.

Tell me of the meaning within my dreaming ... On which side of wanting  does the world bleed into.
Both are cruel, and simultaneously in good. When love hurts within transitions into a mission of self deliverance.

Tell me of the world through my dreams... A Nefelibata in nature. Soaring far over head. With clouds of white as my wings. I fly... Until all is lost.
And I awake.

-then-

I
Fall
To
Earth

Under the shade of a tree, I can see the world.
Unadulterated colors, bleeding between then lines of society.
Lounging in the depths, soaking up the cool, cool cloak of solitude.
Masked proportion of land, dipping beneath the heat of a comets flare.
God's favorite creation, walking under the sun, melting away in a job well done.

But from the shade of my tree, I can see the world.
Not a bead of sweat befalling my brow.
No shades of luminous ribbons, blaze through my shadows.
My blue eyes, the only ray forgoing all rhyme or rhythm.

I watch the world from behind the line of light.
The untold story, of a girl battling that fight...

I could die for you, hands and knees to lose my head. I would die for you.

Finding my rose colored view of the world is truly gone.  I have stepped on the broken glass of life's meaning and have found it lacking of the beautiful place I imagine as a child. My feet left bleeding, staining my view with that awful shade of red. As it's left my mind confused as my veins turn from blue to amber in color.

Why do people lie? Why cheat? Why steal? ****? Torture?
The simple act of being charitable has now turn into darken ash upon my tongue.

Our world is a very sad place, where a woman is more worried about how pretty she is, than the starving children living sleeping in feat.  It's truly sad, beyond depressing. To be on this planet and my glasses smashed underfoot.

My feet may be bleeding, but heart is the one left aching.

I wanted to be right. An accusation I didn't want to own. Denying I could be wrong as the cigarette was burning slow. You asked and I refute. An unknowing dance with misguided steps. A tango of denial, with the thorn from a rose buried within my sides. I never lied... more of twist of an evasion. An omission of truth, disappearing with the grey ribbons of smoke. You asked the question; did I not answer to the best of my knowledge? Of course, I speak more in a statement than with a query... I never lied, only gave you partial false-truths. An innuendo laced with a common courtesy. Was it such a crime? A honest seduction with the intent of never telling the whole story.

I wanted to be right, with an accusation I would never own. "that I would love you" but how could that be true?

I can see now my excuses are fading faster then your red tipped ember. So I'll just go now, goodbye my half told story. Fair thee well...The time we spent is in the past, and I am now, left with that hole in my head.

I wanted to be right but fibbers never get to be the winners.

You may have cheated on me, but mind you: it wont be as simple when you're trying to cheat on Death.

A face within the shadows. Held before the high Queen, a perched Angel on her shoulder. Watching from above in woe. She died held within his wings of sorrow. Feathers of white, adorn her ****** head a crown. Eyes of candle lit affliction touched her ******* as it no longer rose, to fall.

Warned- of the consequence for showing any empathy. This Angel turned from the benediction of his once reverent Father. Emotions unlike no other, traced his soul with a grace of its own. His beloved Queen: the one who moved him so far from the radiant Light. Now lain to rest in a nameless plot.

He was warned of these sorts of emotions. Warned of what would befall the cause...

Now see here, this is where our dreadful tale comes to a harsh & grievous ending... A punishment befitting the sinful crime. The mark; of the fallen. A brand, burnt into the Angel's flesh. The ungodly sign of his corruption, for all his brethren to bare witness. Stripped of his God given wings, this accursed angelic creature was banished from heaven... Where he belong, out amongst the other sinners and the fallen.

**Fin

Eyes of different colors meet. A golden haze, on the greenest of blue. A glance of a dance unintentionally met. A sheath and a silver sword, crossing until two become one. Pupils once closed as they dilate, with a minds so alive its no longer sedate. Our hearts move in sync, with intentions blocked with a knowing shield. Will you surrender... A fight; a dance, our feet moving as one? Parry the attack, with the sunder of mighty virtue. A blade wielding the sun, and a hammer of waning moons. The power of both- an unlimited control of blacken destruction.

Until two become one.

This is not a love poem, nor is it a crescendo of romance.
This is a story of scorn.
Pain and sadness.

Love was once what I felt.
A deep emotion running through my veins.
But that's what was, and the now is neigh-
For no love could survive this endless silver storm.

This isn't a lovers tale. Nor is it a chance to redeem which as already failed.
I writing this to let you know. That I haven't broke.
That each day the sun rises and I am fine.

So, this isn't a love poem.
But a reminder: I am still standing tall.
And my love belongs only to me.

Word spoke in malice,
turn to silver as they roll off the tongue maniacally.

Intention of a depraved notion swivel backward in their motions.
Evil succumbing to the power of provocation.
The sin and burden of wrathful anger trickled down into one simple action.  
An act of devotion...
The willful way of degradation.
Hypersensitive reaction to the extraction.
Asking to be acquitted of your transgression...
How does a Devil ask an Angel to condone such an act of wickedness?
Trespassing on unhallowed ground, and living within a ****** lie.
The error of time...
Feathers of white on a whim of a demon.

When does the madness of your demise separate oneself from the act of humanity.
In death?
Or in the will to live?
These question have been asked from the beginning of time.
The answer are yet, still to be found.
Find solace within yourself.
Stop letting the sins of others weigh into uneven hands.
They're not your's to own or to even know.

In lieu the knowledge I have bestowed.
Go forth and live your life.

Happy, peaceful and in the never ending search of grace.

Just now I watched you float away. An invisible string tied to your heart and off you went. Like a balloon a child had let go of to learn the cause and effect of gravity. I watched you sail away on the breeze. A smile of gratitude lingering on my face. I learned to love you and when it was time to float on, I learned to let go and you flew on.

I ******* loved you; never forget that.
Even if it hurts, its not something to let go.

Children's laughter,
fading echos.
Hidden deep; rooted within the wood.

The smells of forgotten coats and dusty carpets,
as we squeezed inside the family's wardrobe.
A secrete, kept within a child's sacred memory's.
Distant reflections hanging on the fabric of the colorful cupboard.
Our savored innocence, smeared on into adulthood.

Giggling, as we played.
Conscious of the time we bared.
The simple purity of a child's endless games.

How we've forgotten the easiness of the virtue of being young.
The transparent need of just breathing you in.

Two friends, growing beside one another.
One a boy and the other...
Well, she is a girl.
A girl,
No, not something so vague--
A woman,
Who's lips, burns with a redden kiss.

Our childhood stored within the endless wardrobe,
the lust of our youth, suspended forever in dust and wood.
Hidden within the fading echos of times since lost.

I never told you how I love you,
but I carved it into our wall.

A♥J

The mark forever branded.
On my soul to bear.
We are human,
no matter the age.

I love you.

I love you.

I love you.

I speak these words as I lock them away.
To the back, hidden beneath the skeletons in the closest.

I love you.

I love you.

I love you.

A noose around my neck, these words they are.
A dead man hanging with flowers adorn to crown.

Grown mans tears,
fading with echos.
Hidden deep; rooted within the wood.

I loved you, why couldn't it be so simple?

**fin