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Kalliope Jun 16
Yeah I'm so funny for the stories I tell, but I lived my twenties thinking living was hell
Sure, now it's hilarious that my past was so **** wild but is it really?
I was just a child
I did what I needed to-
I stuck it out, I took my beatings and I tried not to pout, he was the path I chose and there was no way out.
I was seventeen living miles away and when I needed it most, my family never came.
We wonder now, why I stayed, all the things he did to me I should have felt betrayed.
Though he was my captor, he felt more like a savior and maybe thats why for so long-
I excused his behavior.
When no one else would help me, he would stand right there, yeah sometimes he would hurt me, but so did everyone else who cared.
I know now it wasn't love-
just possession and control,
but that 17 year old girl in me was always desperate to prove that wrong.
You don't know you're in an abusive relationship until it's too late
And you don't process how truly bad it got until you're completely out
Kalliope Nov 2018
I want to forget what I said
But I want to remember how it feels
Kalliope Aug 2024
You brought me flowers
But what does it mean?
I can ponder for hours
But I still want you to leave

And this wine is my favorite
I'm surprised you remembered,
I don't know what you expect of it
The man I once loved, you almost resembled

But you haven't been him for a long while
And I know you'll never be him again
Sure, these gestures make me smile
But to say I still love you would be pretend
My skin was black and blue
At the hands of you
A time I won't forget so soon
Kalliope Jul 9
I made peace with my station eons ago,
Perched atop a mountain edge, overlooking a sea of my thoughts.
I sit on the ground while the tall grass sways,
Knees to my chest, drinking it all in,
Hair blowing softly by the winds of change.
A place made on my own,
Created from protection or fear, origin unclear.

Today's a little different however,
The temperature is warmer,
And I'm missing the slight rain that usually falls.

Maybe I’m out of my mind,
But I swear there’s a boat resting on my beach,
Worn and waiting with patient grace,
Rocking gently in the shallow reach,
As if to say, “You’ve sat here long enough,”
Inviting me to finally stand,
To leave this quiet mountain edge behind
And see where I might land.
I’m ever-changing, though I keep one foot here.
But it’s time to leave now, that message is clear.
This sanctuary was solace, and I’m grateful for that,
But it’s also kept me stuck and held me back.
Kalliope May 2018
My mother is stronger everyday
Or maybe she's always been
This way
And I'm just now paying attention.

Maybe I'm just now seeing her daily struggles
Understanding her pain
Past and present.

Just now noticing how having a baby
At 16
Changes you forever
Never knowing who she could have been.

Always knowing I ruined chances at her dreams
Not that she would ever say that
But I did.

Every day passing seeing her more tired than yesterday
Working constantly since I can remember
Always being the supporter.

Just now wondering if she ever wonders who will support her
Or how we will function
Without her.

We won't.
It took me 20 years to appreciate my mother
And I'll never take her for granted again.
Our mom's were people before us, and still are someone, aside from a mother, and I don't think we realize that.
Kalliope Apr 2018
You chewed me up and spit me out
Like the piece of gum you chew
After a cigarette.

She doesn't even know
You started smoking
Again.
Kalliope Aug 2024
You don't want me
But hush now don't say it
I don't know if the words ache
Because I know it's true
Or because you won't admit it
You don't want me
The phrase that beats me black and blue,
Pours out of my eyes like summer rain,
Aches my bones like a cold winter morning,
And I let it
You don't want me entirely, just nearby
Kalliope Jun 28
You look so pretty when you're talking to me,
and just for a second, I want to see what you see.
'Cause if you saw yourself in the way that I do,
you'd realize your worth-
and maybe I'd realize mine too
If I let you borrow my eyes, would you return them unscathed?
Kalliope Jun 11
Maybe I'm nails on a chalkboard,
Interrupting peace with every screech.
Your two least favorite foods mixed together
A sight no one wants to see.

Maybe I’m polka dots paired with stripes,
Three clashing shades of pink.
A beat too fast, the words don’t match,
And you’ll never catch up to me.

I’m toast that's burnt, leaves left on the curb,
The promise of fun—but never the one.
And worst of all?
I’m the one who got me there.
It's just a reminder to be better
Kalliope Apr 2018
You can't find love in the arms of someone who doesn't love you,

That didn't stop me from searching  
 all night.
Kalliope Apr 2018
I tried to disappear a few times,
You always found me.
I don't know if that makes me
Love or hate you.
Kalliope Apr 2018
I am not your property.
You do not own me.
I choose to stay.

At least that's what I tell myself.
Kalliope Apr 2018
I always run to your bed when I'm lonely,
And fifteen minutes later I'm still lonely but at least I'm
satisfied.

— The End —