Dear Mia,

I don’t know where I’d be without you. Perhaps a thousand more scars would line my thighs and decorate my arms. You gave me something to distract myself with when I thought a blade was the only way to punish myself.

Mia, oh how you came to me at dinner every night like a reliable friend. Reminding me to take sips between bites and chew my food to oblivion. Instructing me like a caring guide on all the right positions to make me sick faster and get everything out. You’d make sure I mouthwashed every night and knew I slept better with the ache of an empty stomach.

But you also left my knuckles raw from the scraping of my teeth. And when I rid of my stomachs contents the headaches I’d get were immensely painful. My heartbeat so fast I couldn’t move for fear of fainting. Constantly checking my breath for halitosis and the fear of eating in public. My family should hire me instead of a plumber having to clean out drains so often when I felt more deserving than the porcelain toilet bowl.

You took a lot out of me Mia. You’re absolutely no good for the dreams my heart holds anymore. And although your shadow will always flicker during meals, I won’t let you be a solid spirit in my life.

-Goodbye✌
P. S. Tell Ana she’s next

I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶
̶  I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶ ̶
̶I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶
                                                  I­̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶
̶I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶ ̶
̶I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶  h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶
I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶
̶I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶  y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶ ̶
̶I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶
                                                   ­        I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶
̶I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶ ̶
̶I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶
I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶  y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶
̶          I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶ ̶
̶I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶
I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶
̶       I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶ ̶
̶I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶
I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶
̶I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶ r̶d̶e̶r̶ ̶
̶I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶
               I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶
̶I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶ ̶
̶  I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶
        I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶
̶I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶ ̶
̶I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶
   I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶  h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶
̶                                    I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶ ̶
̶I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶
         I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶
̶I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶ ̶
̶I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶
                                                   ­                             I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶
̶I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶ ̶
̶I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶
               I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶
̶I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶ ̶
̶I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶
                                     I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶
̶I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶ ̶
̶I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶
    I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶
̶I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶ ̶
̶  I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶
I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶  r̶d̶e̶r̶
̶I̶'̶  l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶ ̶
̶I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶
I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶  e̶r̶
̶       I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶ ̶
̶I̶'̶l̶l̶         ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶
                                 I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶
̶I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶ ̶
̶     I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶
I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶
̶I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶   r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶d̶e̶r̶ ̶
̶I̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶t̶r̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶r̶  d̶e̶r̶
          


                                    ­               ᵤntᵢl my
lₑgs bᵣₑₐk

          bₑfₒᵣₑ my ₑyₑs clₒsₑ

                                                      
                                                                ­                      blₑₑdᵢng nₒsₑ

            until
             I break myself
                 for trying my hardest