I devoured it
every last morsel
your beliefs and concepts
the distorted images and judgements
you baked, I ate
knowing they were the only meals
I would ever get from you
I gorged on your infection

Years would pass
before my stomach began to churn
poisoned by your scanty rations
the thought of another mouthful
was more than I could bear
You tried spoon feeding me
But I choked on every toxic ingredient
you blended into my existence

Not so long ago I found someone
who knew exactly what I was craving
she dishes out compassion
bowls full of the sweetest of truths
I consumed platefuls of her love
until I satiated my starving soul
and devoured every last morsel
as she taught me to nourish myself

Today I tend my fruitful oasis
planting bountiful seeds of intention
appetizers of love I serve myself
with impeccable kindness
followed by self-respect; a favourite ingredient in all my main courses
and the toppings on my dessert
generous sprinkles of serenity and awe

I beckon to you
ever changing wind
guide me into your softer flow
teach me to soften
and resist not as you challenge me
with gusts of that which
I would rather ignore
sweep my mind free of earthly densities
and lead me with your sound wisdom
to the fullness of life
and the timelessness of now
Lastly, greet me with your gentle breeze
allowing my lungs to fill
with the beauty of your grace
so that I too may remember my own

I thought of you so often
But never did imagine
To have you in my life
With such a deep connection

You teach me everyday
Lessons of love, trust and faith
And even when I stumble
You lift me up with patience and grace

I am in awe of your beauty
The Divine and Human spirit
You've touched lives on this Earth
The way in which you live it

You are gifted so beyond
What the ordinary imagine
Spreading love to the world
Through your wisdom and compassion

Though sometimes the darkness
Has entered your domain
Your angels move in swiftly
To bring light there once again

I know that you will always
Walk both worlds and here beside me
Your unconditional love
Embracing me to just Be

She dances shamelessly
beneath gazing stars
as midnight’s mystery
envelopes her heart

A pregnant moon
glistens upon naked skin
giving birth to an untethered
fire within

Subtlety cuts in
crisp and cool
tempering the passion
yet unable to contain its fuel

This fire is not passive
it is Love in action
setting her heart ablaze
unapologetic for the ashes

Stillness embraces the sensations of life
be still and feel your own aliveness
nurtured by the sustenance of awareness

I want to cascade over the edge
a deep dive into the abyss
shed every mask of false identity
unapologetically formless

I want to re-emerge entirely
naked, nameless, unknown
sole heiress of my light
divinely nurtured never alone

I will bathe in all my colors
become the bristles of my brush
each stroke unto the canvas
unveils a spirit that won’t be crushed

I am in a prison
cells overflowing with rage
penetrating so deep
within me
now

This anger is all consuming
energy is so draining
blood is boiling
over it
peaks

Spewing, sputtering hate and evil
eyes wide open vessels
popping the top
hat off
kilter

Cannot stop to see straight
jacket is on now
And then I
cry out
loud

I walk for peace
with awareness in stride
Grateful for nature
and you by my side

Your essence may be subtle
or unmistakably strong
Sometimes you hold my hand
and that never feels wrong

Some words remain unspoken
A deep connection implied
Each an understanding
of the calm feelings inside

You never get tired
Or tell me I’m slow
You’re always smiling
Even when I’m feeling low

Sometimes I struggle
to catch my breath
and then you remind me
This isn’t life or death

With you by my side
I see how much I have grown
You make me forget
I am walking alone

Direction is cryptic along this path
passageways to freedom
wound tightly into thickets
leave answers dangling in plain sight
overlooked by their simplicity

Rain keeps time with my tears
as I navigate the endless cul de sacs
lost in the mazes of foreverness
as each step towards it
takes me further away
from myself

I am the graceless note that ruined a perfect symphony

The truth lies in the undercurrent of wishful thinking, relentlessly bubbling just below the surface, in a mind so polluted it can no longer sustain us. The mind is powerful and if given too much control can run amuck, wreaking havoc in our lives and causing us to believe we are powerless.

Every single one of those unfulfilled wishes continues to reside within that murky mind just waiting for the right stream of light; that one spark of hope, to be reborn. The time for trusting and believing in ourselves is now.

Can you count the times you have felt creativity flowing through you but you held back pursuing your dreams because of fear? The “what if’s” becoming so overwhelming you shut down all that passion and joy just so you could go back to feeling safe? The ego LOVES to keep us safe and should be appreciated when the need for survival arises. But we aren’t living in a world full of sabre tooth tigers anymore and there is a great cost to us when we are simply choosing to exist and become unwilling to accept there is a powerhouse of infinite energy within us. If nourished and attended to, it would change our lives forever. Think of the ego as one dust particle in a sea of infinite stars.

The truth of who we are is vast and powerful.

I want you to know I see you. I see what you are capable of, I see the brilliance of your light and I want you to know that you can see it too.

Take a moment now and put your hand to your heart, connect to it, feel it beating. Close your eyes and feel the beauty that is you. This is your powerhouse and we are the infinite stars my friends. It is time to be vast and powerful, it is time to soar.

#lovemorefearless ❤️

It is morning
Still the nighttime
blankets the translucent dew
I awoke missing you
Your scent
your flowing, midnight hair
The way you smoked your cigarettes and your penetrating stare
I miss your smile
As you greeted me
Your hugs so encompassing
When we had to say goodbye
I miss your voice
Telling me not to forget
I miss the circumstances
In which we met
I miss your love
...
I don't miss
the tragic memory
October 22
The day I texted you
My gut saying, she's walked away
Her brother's response
You had died that day
The guilt
That's still ripping me apart
Missed opportunities
to express
what you truly meant
To me
I don't miss
how I wasn't there
For you
And the pain I caused
So lost in my own righteousness
I couldn't hit pause
I don't miss regret
...
It is morning
Still the moonlight
Highlights
These open wounds
I lie here still longing
For you
Lost in this tragedy
And the day you left me
Oh how I miss you

Nighttime bequeathed it’s darkness
to the lightness of morn
while silence lingered
in the stillness of dawn
the whispers of life
made themselves known

I experienced bliss, infinite love
and powerful light
witnessed the magic that surrounds me
spread my Earth angel wings and took flight

Uncovering a world where judgment
has no power
where the mind is subordinate
to the hearts wisdom, the divine flower

I nestled into her womb
nurtured and at peace
felt the wholeness of my existence
as endless suffering ceased

I believed I had made it
to the proverbial Promised Land
I was void of deep emotional pain
until fear grasped my hands

Cast into the shadows
I was a prisoner to panic’s grip
the mind became unruly
I lost heart’s feelings and our kinship

Thoughts torment present moments
I judge my past and careless mistakes
bliss, love and magic have left me
because I failed to stay awake

seeping like red wine staining a white blouse
it implodes into each delicate fibre
exposing the loose threading
of its unsuspecting host

It is underestimated
like trickles of muddy water
filling superficial cracks
seconds before the flood

interwoven become the strands
of hatred and harmony
as sorrow unearths the hardened soil
around those densely habitual roots

emerging from its confines
it spreads the contagion of loss
disables the cure for love
unleashing the inevitability of suffering

I am the ragged rock
Amidst a seamless shore
The undercurrent
Of the ocean's floor

I am the whistling
As the wind sings through the trees
I am the sorrow
As true love leaves

I am the blinding white
Of a winter's snow
The piercing fright
Of a lion's roar

I am a flickering ember
Of a burning bush
The sweet surrender
Of a lover's touch

I am the night fall
On a sunset strip
The utter shame
Of a controlling grip

I am the last word
In a senseless quarrel
The painful regret
As I beg, steal & borrow

I am the fragrant scent
Of roses in bloom
The grim reaper
Of my impending doom

I am the galactic dust
Of this cosmic realm
The devil's muse
Of this living hell

I am the light at the end
Of this twisted tunnel
The timeless treasure
In a pile of rubble

I am the nothingness
Of the limited whole
I am the home
Within this wandering soul

You & I exist
In colourful hues
Pink trickles in
With each tender kiss
Magenta blushes
As desires rise
From atop the peak
Ruby red soars in
To a sea of utter bliss

Orange beckons a shift
As we linger longer
between white's sheets
And hunger's strike ends
Yellow steps in
With a cheerful grin
To give approval
To our playful
love-in

The depths of blue
take hold
as trust surrounds
us both
Purple sets the stage
For romance to swoon
While mystery and magic
Create our afternoon

Green is the monster
Who rears his ugly head
In the grips of an argument
We take jealousy to bed
Attacking with fear
As black feeds off green
So love can't intervene

But alas, not all
Has faded away
As pink trickles in
With a tender kiss
And in colourful hues
you and I still exist

She sits with misery, emptiness by her side
heavy waves of noisy despair
rush in and out of her mind
like the discordant crush of evening tides

Love waits patiently not far behind
for the perfect moment
to tickle her tepid heart in a
secret chamber where Hope resides

The first light of dawn glitters in eyes
time to heal won’t stand still
so Love’s spark ignites the wick of Hope
setting fire to her desires inside

The truth rejects every lie
as she gives birth to inner wisdom
there’s no room for despair
so misery takes emptiness outside

She sits with joy, compassion by her side
light waves of quiet peace
flow through her hopeful heart
like the rhythmic perfection of morning tides

Love exists from earth to sky
every moment is perfect
while the wick of Hope burns
so does her desire to shine

Her love left home today
evicting our happy place along with me
so my heart closed its door
and threw away the key

It’s hollowness overflows
filling the abandoned spaces
as the sorrow of this aching heart
repeats in resounding echoes

Only remnants remain of a blissful life
soaked into creaking floorboards
this home now barren
mirrors my broken heart tonight

The current of unworthiness runs deep
plunging headfirst into murky waters
knocked clean off my feet

descending into the abyss
where darkness reclaims it’s host
where light fails to exist

ripples of regret rise above
breaching the outer surface
waiting for the waves of love

only regret washes into more regret
and hopelessness grows
and soon I hit the rocky bottom

but I do not die, my life does not end
in fact I stop thinking
and begin to transcend

you see far beneath the surface
underneath the choppy seas
there lives an inner stillness
that without the current of unworthiness
I would never have found within me

I have bathed in muddy waters
run by my family of origin
soaked inside the toxins
let them seep into my skin

One two three they target me
holding my head under water
mocking me when I couldn’t breathe
Obey her orders; punish the daughter

Still I rose up
choking on their cruelties
convincing myself to do better
I learned, to be loved I must please

So I moulded into pliable pieces
of acceptability
and lost my soul to the
hierarchy of family

Consumed by imitation
I wandered alone aimlessly
chained to their beliefs
indoctrinated never to break free

But every spirit has wings
we are all meant to fly
I felt the urgency of a greater calling
not understanding why

So I drained their muddy waters
and soaked inside my restless soul
where the truth of my existence
never surrendered to their control

The moment she let go
fear loosened its grip
and she was clutched
by the hands of Hope
where they knelt and wept

Sorrow fills the spaces
of her deepest wounds
oceans rising to their edges
an outpouring of regret
as the familiarity of suffering looms

The pain is not subtle
reminding her again and again
the grief she began to bury
a thousand lifetimes ago
unearthed the heart she must mend

I am lost in this place
filled with silence
chilled by lack of ease
drowning in misery

She sits in wrong
by societies views
this pretty creature
a sheep clothed by wolves

Passively she looks on
few decisions to make
its not worth the bother
to plan an escape

They will hunt you down
and tear out your soul
they know no mercy
death is their goal

So just take your place
and please keep still
it won’t take but a moment
one more victim to ****

My mind has this place
where wisdom conquers madness
and beauty meets grace

where I surrender to reverie
into slumberless dreams
a fleet of ships drifting the open sea

A shallow brook travels slow
its lure a whisper
as I sink into her flow

Where honeybees buzz as wildflowers sway
a tango with the wind
and I am carried away

Sunlight glitters through endless trees
where I inhale deeply
and draw in the summer’s breeze

Soiled by the earth, my skin in bloom
where we reunite
as I am nestled into her womb

Where I am greeted by love and welcomed home
conceived into wholeness
and never alone

Insights are the seeds which grow the roots that unearth the buds which opens its blossoms and flourishes within the wisdom of light

You know the place
Where you hide
Truth disguised
Somewhere beneath
Drama and bravado


Where deception is perception
In the eyes of all you meet
Somewhere beneath
Apathy and imperfection


Where you keep those secrets
***** and enslaved
Somewhere beneath
Guilt and shame


Where you layer the lies
You told and were told
Somewhere beneath
Justification and betrayal


Where fear prevails
In the pit of your stomach
Somewhere beneath
Loathing and rage


Where self-doubt debates
In mindless chatter
Somewhere beneath
Arrogance and swagger


Where you acknowledge its place
Coddle and groom the space
Somewhere beneath falling from grace
You know the place

Subdued sapphire
embodies the western skyline
the evergreen waits patiently
for the moon’s light to shine
so as to cast its shadow
across a hardened ground
extending its presence
without the slightest sound

a tender moment
encompasses profound serenity
as she IS with grace

Desperate to find my identity
longing to find my place
I run, falling to the snow
unable to feel my presence
unable to feel whole

I scream out to the moon
in a primal rage
blind with envy
while their lies take centre stage

The moon lit up my fury
and pulled me in from above
“humbled is the heart
whose every beat
emits love.”

The stars chimed in,
“The answers you seek
will never be found
if you look outside of yourself
you will always feel alone”

I knelt within the shadow
of the evergreen tree
surrendering I listened
as it whispered to me
“the existence of your presence
is not separate from me”

I sunk into the depths
of our ever growing shadows
I wore the anguish of our past
and cried a river of sorrow

I began to shed my masks
saw beyond the constructs of my light
lost the illusions of my essence
and self judgement for not always shining brightly

I remain within the river
accepting all that I am not
my roots entwine with the evergreen
the moon and stars align
grateful for its stepping stones
I now leave the past behind

Blue skies
Warm winds
The sun glistening
on my winter skin
Trees lengthen branches
and sprout their wings
A joyful birdsong echoes
in a sea of green
Bees lustfully caressing
flowers in bloom
Young lovers falling
deeply
into a swoon
Summertime energy
Is all around
But the emptiness inside
has already filled me
to the brim

It is 5:30am
Back to work I go, again
Same structured routine
Expecting nothing to change

Patiently I wait
Upon the transit platform
A lonely pigeon's cooing
Amidst a darker foreground

I listen as the notes
Softly leave her tiny throat
This unassuming melody
Becomes my soul's remedy

I smile
Lost within her beauty
I am gone
Whispers of love embrace me
As she welcomes in the dawn

Neville said,
"A change of feeling
is a change of destiny"
Today it set me free

It’s never a gentle knocking
Whenever it comes a calling
Fists full of endless fury
Invoke pain with no warning

No forgiveness and no mercy
As white knuckles break the glass
Can’t escape the comeuppance
Nor out run your past

With causes all in question
The effects won’t be denied
Review all of your actions
And you may uncover the why

The totality of our existence
Every action, feeling, thought
Will make its way back to us
Because our karma can’t be fought

Knowing
this present moment,
is a gift to us all

Sifting into long lines
the sand, white
the image vast
sun strokes the earth in a feverish decent

Blonde ashes linger
in thick air
as mountain peaks breathe the mystery
of moonlight

Sheltered beneath the stars
and the vastness of night
Lone wolf remains anchored
peaceful, purposeful, content

Red rock surrounds a centrepiece of fire
the density of wood disintegrates
a releasing as passion crackles through
flames and smoke into a crisp, black night

Traces of light
match the stars
the wind subtle in its intention
to breathe life into the skin

Waking up the senses, the voiceless speaks
it’s empty whispers
echoing back unto itself
it’s intention complete

It’s dark I should be sleeping
but the worries are a creeping
into my head like spider webs
I beg until I’m weeping

I fluff the pillows and make the bed
I pull the covers up over my head
and in they prance like army ants
to feast until I’m dead

I flip and flop, then toss and turn
Getting mad at myself, will I ever learn?
There’s just one way to make them pay
off I head to the nearest tavern

She sang the chorus
and melancholy hues thundered
through the silence like embers
burning the emerald out of the green

Each verse a deepening
of the beginning into the end
like ash claims the earth long after
the fire has burned

Still lyrics of hope
clutched tightly to the notes
like rainbows bridge the gap
long after the storm has passed

Again, she sang the chorus
this time tears spilled over the edge
of heartache
like rain striking the heat out of the flames

Should you find yourself weary
and in need of a rest
Sit
take a moments’ breath
let the words on these pages
be a reminder to throw caution
to the wind
to love without boundaries
and never let your fears win

We are all meant to find our light
never stop seeking
even through the darkness
light can shine
You are brilliant beyond the shadows
wisdom whispers when you are willing
to listen to the never ending melodies
your heart will always play for you
be willing to listen now

You are loved
just as you are
I see you
all that you are
and all that you are willing to become
remember
we are only as able to soar
as we are willing to fall
so fall with grace

Will you ever cease
to permeate my words
and stain my pages
with your bloodline?

Time after time I consume the cure
still your pathogens infest my clarity
sulphuric droplets of your despise
sadistically corrode my freedom

Will I ever finish
self serving the Victim?
Unresistingly obedient as I gorge
on your indiscretions

Removing your strands seems futile
long after separation
I remain unwillingly infected
soaking in the poverty of your love

The embodiment of truth
and the unequivocal acceptance
of the sacredness
and divine essence of Love
reside within the intangible
purity of the heart’s
secret chamber of
wisdom

I ripple like water
as you cast your stones
Sinking to inner depths
as I swallow them whole

My body becomes muddy
as each wave hits the shore
I’m visibly choppy
but you keep throwing more

No signs of mercy
as I bubble at the surface
My chaos feeds your sadism
and you become more ruthless

I froth at the mouth
churning in your squall
as I’m nearing the brink
Still waters call

Mist escapes me
as the undercurrent flows
You may have agitated the surface
but the extent of me will never be exposed

Light glistening through Winter’s stillness leads awareness to its deeper truth

There is no distance between space
and this truth stands still with Time
so I sway to the rhythmic pulses
trusting I am universally aligned

In this land of dreams so sweet
I walk through cobble stone streets
inhaling the delicate notes; your song
as it’s texture unequivocally fills me

Her ripples ebb and flow
as I wade through crystal streams
the composition of my heart’s desires
reflect the chorus of this dream

I trust the affinity of these chords
to conduct this unfinished symphony
Perfecting the melody of its notes
she orchestrates it’s love effortlessly

Exhale let sorrow breathe
offer your secret tears a path
down shameless cheeks

Inhale the light of hope
let go of old habits
trust me I know you can cope

Be brave let love reside
give your heart the key
unlock the prison of feelings inside

Pause, let stillness be
in a world that’s unforgiving
choose to set yourself free

Where are you oh creative one?
drowning in a downpour of sorrow
or seeking love where there is none?

Words no longer ripple into an open sea
I long for your egress
where I escape the demons in me

Why did you leave me on my own?
did you disappear into the same shadows
that keep me lost and alone?

I miss your expression so vibrant and true
I am nothing without that which
is solely defined by you

Compose with me a wordless tune
teach me to dance whimsically again
by the light of a silent moon

They chitter chatter
whispers so low
Hateful words lingering
while judgements grow

They stab the unsuspecting
with their cruelty and lies
giggling as victims bleed out
near death not knowing why

They are master manipulators
if you’re lacking self esteem
Blatantly despising you
then stroke your ego to get what they need

You can fuel their fire
by keeping yourself small
by judging their judgements
You feed the cycle, slowly killing us all

You won’t win through retaliation
don’t let anger control your mind
Feel the sadness of their cruelty
and self compassion is what you’ll find

We, the bullied and near broken
must keep our spirits high
We have a soul responsibility
as Keepers of the Light

It’s never about the oppressors
and their selfish, evil ways
It’s about time to summon your power
and shine your brilliant rays

My words may be simplistic
Lacking rhythm, flow and ease
But the depth of my emotion
Runs deeper
Than you think

As I process your silence
And what
It truly means
Sadness fills this empty page
While rage begins to fade

The love you lost between us
Isn’t written on your face
It hides behind the masks
You wear
They keep you feeling safe

While safety has its purpose
When you step into the street
Disguising fear
With apathy
Will strike you to your knees

A cascade of tears create an inlet
while a desert of scars leaves me stranded
The subtleties of the wounded spirit
won’t always bleed from my wistful heart

I reflect in the ocean of sorrow
whilst famine feeds my storm
Quenching the longing for insight
I am witness to the rising of a new dawn

I will betray this spiritual darkness
by tending to my sacred garden
Soaking the seeds of compassion
I lie in wait for my soul to blossom