i wish i didnt hate
myself for loving a snake,
but i do.
i regret ever saying
"i love you"
(knowing its true)
and boosting his ego
even though it deserved
to be bruised.
Lessons learned:
monsters will always be monsters
no matter how much
they once
looked like angels and bit
like serpent.

im breathing involuntary air,
That is acarbon chemical.
im never truly taking a breath
because i know when i do
that i will breathe in all the
grief and heartache
and pain.

you are a window,
i cant touch you
but i can look.

i have the view
but i dont have you.

She looked into his eyes,
His eyes that she looks at all the time.
Only this day in 3rd period on this booth,
It was as he laid his head resting on her leg.
She saw him, looking into those dilating pupils,
And what she saw was love
Compassion
Peace
Warmth
And a sense of calm vulnerability.
She studies him all the time
Its quite a hobby at this point
The way she stares always at the craziest times
And him asking can i help you,
He could, he can.
But we dont get into that right now,
Right now we talk about how this was different.
This relationship
This love
This moment in the booth of that cafetaria room.
She stared as he rested his eyes,
She noticed how delicately his each individual
Lashes were placed by God,
How their breaths were in sink
And not even on purpose,
His jaw clicking repeatedly as he clenched his back molars,
His hand gently secured on her flesh,
When his eyes stared back at hers like nothing else
Mattered right there in that moment right there on that booth
Nothing else.
How he is different, and i dont mean
From ‘the rest of them’,
I mean
Nobody else understands what she sees
Except for her, except for them
And no matter if her friends bash on her for the decisions
She will forever love that bond that others dont get. That
Is how he is different.
And that
Is what she saw.
Now she only needs help with one thing,
And that is to not lose this.

my greatest love, my greatest poetry
Came from you.
Thank you.

Sometimes
The way to find out
If he loved you like you love him?
Is to find someone who truly does;
Who shows you what it was and what love should be.
Someone who
Makes you smile at
First glance,
Or knows when
Something is off,
And loves you for you or smiles
At your stupid-silliness,
Someone who
Loves every intricate part of you
The old and new
And shows it when
They kiss you,
Someone who
Shows you that:
That guy never truly loved you,
He liked the thought of having you but clearly
Not enough to keep you,
No like you deserve
Even if it felt like it
Even if you love him so much it hurts;
That guy never loved you,
But this one does.

I love the way
His arms encircle around
Me held tightly
Against him
possessive,
Clingy.
Like a warm blanket,
He doenst want to let go,
I dont
Want to let go.
It feels safe.
And maybe its just exaggeration,
But all my worries fears
Once outstruck on
The surface are now
buried beneath my feet  The moment he
touches me,
The moment his eyes meet mine.
I love him.
I love the way
He feels,
two bodies lose of any tension
Felt before then,
When we weren't standing there
Tangled together.
I love the way
I can look
Into his eyes and get lost
Or when i admire;
Sitting for hours
Staring at
Him. i like that i can,
I am allowed to because he is mine.
I love the way
That he doesnt like to get mad and
When he does
He refuses to take it out
On
Me,
Or when im the one under pressure
He pries information out
Of me,
convinces me to talk about my feelings
Knowing thats whats
Best for me.

  I love the way
  He cares,
    I love the way
  He loves me.