Let me tell you about my bad days
They pop up out of nowhere
In the middle of a laugh
Or maybe a joke
In the middle of an adventure
It just hits
Like running into a brick wall full force
Leaving me breathless
Gasping for just an ounce of oxygen
And it feels like running into a brick wall
Would hurt less
I lose all motivation to do anything
Wishing I could just lay back
And pretend I don't exist
Maybe have a plane fall out of the sky
Putting me out of my misery
Thinking every thought that has run
Through my head millions of times before
Every thought of death and pain
Every daydream of dying over and over
Sixty different ways
Sometimes with no idea why
All of this pain out of nowhere
For absolutely no reason
Hoping someone might see it and recognize
Pull me away from depression's cold grip
These are bad days
They are not beautiful they are dark
Cold, bleak, filled with pain
Don't romanticize it or wish for it
I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy

My heart got tied by his cord,
When i saw the devil in his eyes.
Didn't mind serving him as god-
His filthy hands on my thighs,
Made me scream lord.

I have broken my vow,
I sincerely seek restitution.
But no one will listen to a "how",
They'll only see the abomination,
For i only thought of now.

It'as i who seduced him,
I was the Delilah in his bed.
Although this is such a grim,
My appetite is what i fed,
And in pleasures, i did swim.

It'as somewhat worth it,
His electric stole my soul.
Fire burned in my hells pit-
When he drove in his pole,
Though my skin he slit.

Now addicted to this master,
I want him again.
This time harder and faster,
I'd love the pleasure and pain,
And the wishing that it'll be forever.

Trees do sway and dance
as birds in the sky go fly
end is yet to come.

Trust
Is a strongest pole!
If broke
Many things fall

I cannot let myself
Be consumed by you
I am weak enough
Already
Without taking
Your wounds
And making them
My own

Please know
That I will
Love you still,
But I cannot be
The nerve endings
Connected
To your
Spinal cord