Sometimes I wonder

Why hopes dashed
Why dreams died
Why we cried ourselves to sleep at night

Then I ask my self

*"Why did you expect too much?"

Hi, my single H word.

I notice that you don't even have a hellopoetry
I notice that it has never crossed your mind that I write things for you

But here goes the pieces of my mind that you probably never know,
the pieces of my mind that contain you,
the pieces of my mind that you may ignore later

I started to write things about you since the day you gave me the heart-shaped crumble of papers
Crumble of papers that my friends considered as a trash but turned out to be something meaningful for my self
Crumble of papers that remind me of you every single day

I know that you have no idea that they would be such a thing for me

But can't you see?
There's always at least one thing that makes a start for something
And that was your thing that have made a start for some point of my self

Love.

Sometimes I think that it's funny how our friends think I'm fine
It's funny how our friends think I'm just fine with you hanging around
And it's funny how our friends think that there's nothing between us

But yet somehow, I think that it's not too funny if our friends think the way they think about us
Because I've been trying so hard to cover myself up
I've been trying so hard to act as normal as possible when you're around
I've been trying so hard to denying my self about the simple pleasure I got everytime you're around

Baby, I act cool. Too cool. I know.

But there are too many things that you don't know just yet
How my heart beating hard and goes on on and on everytime you call up my name
How the air feels like completely out of space 'til it makes me hard to catch my breath
How I choked up with words I could not say everytime you act something adorable and I just could not resist to adore you from somewhere deep within my self
How I want to whisper those 3 syllable words right to your very ears with the low tone of my voice cause I really mean it when I say it

"I love you."

Does it ever matter to you that I love you?

My God, H, maybe you won't even realize but I really do love you so much

Does it ever matter to you that I love you?

H,
You really don't realize how lovable you are to me
You really don't realize how you could change my whole day to be better or worse by just saying a few things
You really don't realize how much I love you from the day you stared at both of my eyes and smiled with the tiny lips on your face

Baby, I act cool. Too cool. I know.

But now here comes the point where I don't want to seem so cool to everybody
I don't care if they think I am so lame, and lousy for saying and writing and thinking too much about things that probably won't ever going to happen

And now here comes the most beautiful 3 words in English that could make you feel something

**I love you

Can't seem to get rid of the flickers that made through the glass of your veins
Those little lights that dancing on our skin
The dusts that stumbling down when our eyes can't even see
Telling us where are we going to be

The roads that lead us here
Screaming out loud where would we be now after this
Those insanities that brought me here
Asking me the truth how could I get here

Blaming the lights, they don't want to be
Blaming the dusts, they can't even seemed
Blaming my self, how could I get here?
Blaming ourselves, how could we get here?

Writing this poem in the corner of this coffee shop
Two glass of grande-sized coffee
Frappuccino, Mochaccino
are just not enough I guess

Seeing you walking around the room
Talking, acting too beautifully to be remembered
Touching the girl I would never want to be
I am just who I am I suppose
I am just not like her I suppose

Putting your hands in the pocket of your dark blue Levi's jeans
Stepping up high through the sole of your light grey Van's sneakers
Laughing too much, talking too beautifully
Smiling too seductively, brushing your hair too manly

Am I just not enough for you, Darling?
I've been waiting for quite a whole month just to see you physically

Am I just not enough for you, Darling?
I've been waiting for you 'til my eyes flooded by my own tears

Am I just not enough for you, Darling?
**Am I just not enough for you, Darling?