Would you need it so bad you leave one
to sit and stare at you all night?
Would you have your guitar handed to you
as I carry mine in a heavy black case?
Can you carry a tradition of a summer night
sing along and not have it all to yourself?
What a shame,
that such an occasion,
was sold to you and bought by your
soul.
A soul on what they fawn over and
poetry is written about your voice.
Your voice, the songs you play,
I heard it all before, and I heard it enough
to know you as desperate.
Stop making it about you, and
let us shine together all of us in the cool
summer night air.
Slapping every mosquito and sipping
champagne, just share something
for once.

I miss the feeling of being held
like a baby in somebody's arms.
I would shed my tears and catch
my breath while my face was
buried in their innocent chest.
As we had the moment I would
hear a thousand thumps and
feel a drumbeat to my face.
It was
their
Heart.

Today I lay alone like a child
locked in their bedroom
avoiding their family and
refusing to reveal the truth
of the interactions they face
in the outside world.
I have no need to avoid my
family but my friends avoid me.
WHY!

I learn to live with no arms
to hold me nobody to lay
beside me and accept that
nobody has a heart that is
understanding enough to
beat for me.
It's just
A
Phase.

Waking up is harder than it seems.
It's not the hourglass
it's not the dreams.

The thoughts are destroying my
calm.
Never again will I feel my feet
or keep a clean palm.

My hand trembles
it is now four going on five.
In the AM
reminding how I am alive.

Rather unfortunate
the red in my eyes.
Heart pounding faster
than a lover who lies.

A mother who dies,
then her daughter cries.
Knowing how slow
this everlasting night flies.

Going to bed is harder than
I want it to be.
Out of the time in the day missed
and living with
ANXIETY.

Don't be shy,
just go fly over,
to the pink flower that does nothing to you.
For you, provide the pollen and sweet perfume.
Hummingbird, it's just a photograph being taken.
How could I ever hurt you?
Just to stare out the big window
to watch you at the rosebush.
Your pointy scrawny beak,
big, yellow eyes ,
show how aware you are to your potentially dangerous surrounding.
Olive green feathers,
and your small, petite physique.
Display your confidence.
Now I'll just take a photo now
because representation of nature
is what you show and deserve.
You are beautiful, Hummingbird.

Where are you to hold me when I need you to?
Where are the understanding thoughts others have of my imperfections when I can't help myself either?
Why do the horrid memories replay in my hippocampus when I thought I already turned them off?
Where is my mania to squash my depression half?
Why do I seem helpless and wait forever to succeed in the adult world?
Why do I get so intensely excited then become an antagonistic monster?
Why did I not know then what I know now?
Becoming a victim completely unaware.
Proved wrong and I strip to be the bad one
so everyone shuts up.
Humiliated and hurt and everyone looks out for me.
Naive behavior and hunger too strong I steal from others.
Tears swelling in front of small children.
A girl who wanted nothing but for me to suffer.
A boy who wanted nothing but my genitals.
A troubled woman who wanted nothing but my time.
A guy who wanted nothing but for me to be his *****.
A guy who possessed me,
Though everyone at some point
Did.
I've been owned, abused, humiliated, hurt, assaulted, victimized, bullied, made fun of, attempted to **** myself, blown off, screamed at, fought with, admonished, antagonized, used, looked down on, bossed around, yelled at, pushed, shoved, thrown away.
Today,
I have love that is a beautiful miracle and proof I will be loved without being pushed into what's only for him.
I have a few good friends who care and don't grab my hand.
I occasionally hate who I'm becoming when the anger within is the kraken in my body swerves herself around me inside slowly and aggressively.
Only way she comes out is through profane vulgarity in my words and through my lips.
They're gone,
They're not mine,
They're hurtful,
But remember they're only for a moment.
I'll be done with the anger one day someday,
and the kraken is just a myth.
Though my traumatic stories may seem like a myth too,
be grateful I'm still here and
smiling.:)

Like I said on the phone with you that very upsetting night.
We both saw a dark sky but you felt a cold chill in the air.
I may have been warm but I was nowhere near pleased with myself.
I behaved as a child in front of you due to your honesty that we shouldn't go further.
You were right despite my devastated heart.
It was all you who carried a genuine heart and you were a man.
A man who listens to one he cares for and has patience.
A man who tells a person who speaks of nothing but their life and problems to stop and say something positive.
You were a man who told me I should think better of myself.
Well,
I have tried.
And from then on and today I just don't know how to respond to men like you.
I knew you were too perfect for me, and thus you are the perfect example of what a man should be.
You respect so graciously and have fun in the best ways.
I could never forget you and your attempt to bring me into your life.
Though it didn't work out for us, and it was only one date, I dare say you were the best I ever had.
I don't love you, just remember you and hope you are doing well.
You did not break my heart. It was already broken.
That should have been my own red flag.
Going back to that night on the phone, something was missing in that apology.
Before I hung up, I should have told you something important.
I never really know how to respond to men who show interest in me.
I have a lot of baggage and thus it's embarrassing.
There are not many men who have stepped up to the plate and wanted me like that.
The others are pictures to burn, but you
are remembered in my mind.
I may not have kept in touch but I keep you in memory just love thinking of your smile as you used to gaze into my eyes.
Even if your eyes are in another her and she makes you smile everyday, you deserve to be happy.
I honestly wouldn't have it any other way.
That very upsetting night, we both agreed you were right.
Being in love
Was wrong.
And you pressed the red button
First.

When I am old I expect nobody to sit and have tea with me
who once saw me as young and cared to show me an old
picture.
When I am fifty I will wake up alone and tuck my mother and
father in bed at night where they once did to me years ago.
When I am thirty I will return my wedding gown after another
bipolar episode he just won’t take it anymore.

I am now twenty, and I have years to live and improve
myself,
my spirit,
my life.

Who knows where I will be? Maybe I will be digging in the dirt
at a farm or perhaps riding the elevator in a big
skyscraper.
Let the past shape me and form me into what I wanted and not
what they wanted.
Forgive myself for my mistakes, and never take away my own
chances.

I see my future from a glance but I don’t know everything and never
will.
I can’t predict nor can I control the universe along with the time.
Let the clock tick and just have fun with the running out.
Walk with arms wide open and have the patience to find what we
visualize.
Let visuals be toys and consequences be keys to unlocking new and
proper opportunities.
Love what you have and are and never beg for more.
Good things come to those who do not get on their knees for the sake of
getting.
Learning and saying “I don’t know” is the key to knowing and the process of
giving.
Give and get, live and learn, never take the present moment for granted, and
understand the misunderstood.
It’s not about having it all, it’s about
learning from it.

Blasting from its peak,
Towering over itself back in its water surface.
Light underneath electricity beckons for a sight.
The sound of the splashing.
How I just need to watch despite disobey.
Speaking from my thoughts,
Mouth moving as my mind is dying.
Memories shared are never accepted.
Just want to bring us all together as this fountain blasting in the dark with a little
Light underneath the waters height.
Is as big
As this drama.
We are farther apart
Than
The peak of the fountain
And the water to
Keep it
Stable.
What I wouldn't do
To bring us back again
And we circle hand in hand.
Lift our hearts up
If we were still
Like a fountain.
No matter how far we are,
My independence grows on its own.
I just sit and fall in love with the light that shines in the water.
I'm thinking
Of how
We used to
Be.

I wake up,
I put on my plaid,
I put liner on my eyes,
honestly, it doesn't look bad.
Its not about whats on me,
its what I do.
I may not always comprehend,
and I may not be a good friend.
I've let people down
so many times in my life
before.
Remember that I am only human,
and with times like these
there will be plenty more.
I say, I do, I misunderstand you.
You tell, You instruct, I say,
what the ****?
Now today I washed my insecure
and told me I love you.
I knocked the mental Stop Sign
down and out of my face.
No longer will people react to my
smartness by taking as a,
"Surprise! Happy Birthday!"
The liner on my eyes
shows no coverage, but
esteem.
Try a new guitar brand,
try a new flavor ice cream.
Theres so much more to life than
internships,
Co-ops,
and strawberry freeze-pops.
It's trying,
applying,
and learning.
So we deal with
the post-argument
and the popcorn thats burning.
As I grow,
I'll have you know,
the liner on my eyes,
Is supposed to show.
My quirky-artsistic me,
has so many better places
to go.
So I'll put on my liner,
I'll be myself,
and when I am,
DON'T EVER
tell me NO.

I want to go back to that little girl
who would run around the house and never
care an ounce about what others said.
I want to wear those elegant little dresses
and not be old enough to care about how my
body looks in the dress.
I want to be young enough to cry and
show emotion and get away with saying
what is on my mind.
I want to now tell that little girl to never again
threaten to run away from her mother and father.
I will tell her to be nicer to them and not hit,
kick, or bite them because she didn’t get
what she wanted.
That girl is now full of wisdom and sympathy.
She hugs her parents whenever she sees them and
begs to come home.
I feel no guilt from childhood because I learned
over the years.
She was actually funny, that little girl.
Now she has grown,
and she knows and teaches that
the past is in the past, though we learn and
become better the more we let go.
Just think of the child who you are better than
today.

A phone call is something I jump to
within excitement of being reached.
This one is serious,
and  my voice cracks as I say good bye
and hang up.
I always said It would be better
if my existence faded.
The news tells me I am important.
There are things to be dealt with and
possible consequences and changes to be faced.
Not every change is a consequence,
not all news is bad,
not all thoughts of dying are true
until you learn
it could be real.
It is hard when this is the end.
Don’t even want to think about a new
beginning.

2015,
You were full of cat fights, injuries, hurt,
And suffering.
A lot was lost on account of you.
So many were gone and nothing was put
Back into better place.

2016,
I'll try to keep away my grudges.
I'll forgive all those who trespass me and abuse my emotions just to get what they want.
I'll get what I want this time.

2015,
******* and rest in peace.

2016,
Let's get happier.

To act but to feel,
to want but to be hurt,
to remember so many happy times,
then the truth came along.
Go out and see the city lights,
holding hands despise the ***,
to be thankful of this gift of friends,
then everyone
is
dating.
Insecurity attacks,
I can't feel good about anything.
I want everything to be my way.
It never will,
I always thought I would find
someone perfect.
I thought it was him.
And then,
the truth came
along.

I'm a Zebra look at me!
I'm white with black stripes
as you see.
Put your finger
in my
finger-puppet hole.
You can have
a puppet show!
But whatever you do,
don't break me.
I'm old and sensitive
as you see.

It may be in the past,
Doesn't mean I'm not scared.
Could now be behind me,
Though anything could
Be put in front of me.

I try to let go.
I cannot forget.
My heart is pounding out of
My chest.
My body trembles and shakes
Like a loud maraca.

Will they come find me?
Do they remember what I do?
Will it get worse?

I know it's over,
But what are my consequences?
Lobotomy?
Death?

Stop it.
I'm fine.
Like everyone else,
I'm over it.
And now and forever,
It is in,
The past.

Walk by alone,
or have people by the side.
The picnic bench is one that is relied.
To be a go-to place no matter
the situation.
Put on a red and white table cloth,
have a picnic,
choose your recreation.
Walk over and put your foot on the bench.
Make a phone-call,
or sing in the rain and get drenched.
Have a date see how it goes,
the people who come by change,
but the picnic bench knows
it has nowhere else to go.
A necessity that people are unaware.
Since the limit is six,
lucky seven,
pull up a chair.
Light a candle in this dark summer night.
We have food, a fire pit that is cooking,
a guitar, marshmallows to roast, friendship,
and this picnic bench makes it all right.

They say it is never too late to do the right thing.
Will it be awkward to reach out one last time?
It isn't fair if one is benefited
and one isn't.
Or is it?
What shall I do for the ones I let go by mistake?
Should those who have cut me out of the picture
be aware of my forgiveness?
I never know where to start.
It always occurs that they know
where to
end.
Is one in control of every relationship?
Who is really taking the picture?
Holding a camera
seeing how the image will appear.
The flash representing the moment.
The friendship photoshopped,
the antagonist cropped out by the
protagonist.
Who has the right to cut anyone out?
Where do these rights come from?
How do these images not burn for some?
Is it me
or
the camera.
What am I doing wrong?

I hear nothing from any of them and fear
I have destroyed the heart
Of a someone I have.
All this time being alone
with bullets in my head
and
hammers in my heart
nailing down the truth of
what I may come to be.
Penniless and enraged  I'll
be someday.
These thoughts of fire in the
corner of the cafe where I want
To meet for coffee burns down
the building and kills one of us.
The day we first met for a cocktail
as we cheered our glasses together
and took a sip at the same time
was like a promise.
A promise that we would have fun whenever we can and take care of
each other.
Now I can't remember how to get back
to the bar nor what I usually order.
I return home and sit on my bed.
The bullets in my head just tell me
to lie down and rest.
The nails in my heart somehow manage
to make me think I'll wake up and someone
I knew for years will be beside me.
Sometimes the dreams I have of all of us
together
scream No at me
since I'm always alone at the bar.
They don't look promising.
Just living every hangover
alone.
Since I will now make a promise
to be
Sober.

Praying for the day where
It's ok to pull people apart from one another.
Hoping that they go out for the last time
and holding hands is out of the question.
We ask why the said their vows at the altar.
Did they have to?
Who was it who really wanted to?
White gown, flowers held by every girl, and ties and tuxedos on every man.
This won't be the only night we have this feeling.
The wedding ends and these two are a mess.
One is gone and devastated the other is gone and with another "mine".
Today, we spoke the truth after every raging phone call knowing there were tears as they were explaining another fight over everything.
The questions turned to much more realistic views.
The sugar coated topping has been melted and barely helped.
We ask,
will they be ok?
Did we do the right thing by supporting them being together?
Why did we wait till now to realize it really
was never meant to be?
We're we right?
They were wrong.
Family gatherings are so different than what we adapted to when we were young.
Now there is extra food
for the new significant other.
Some are afraid to come knowing there will be a fight over everything.
Amiable as we needed to be.
Optimism was how we mended what we would see.
How we noticed as the use the time they are not looking to roll their eyes, complain to another member, or bury their head in their hands over what they did.
Feel not ashamed, but be honest with yourself.
This family supports and is there for all whether married or single, divorced or dating, gay or straight.
We have our tree.
It is short but staying strong and no broken heart or promise breaks the branch anyone has grown on.
We may have our separate ways but we will always have each other.
It's ok.
We know what happened.
Just climb back up on the tree,
because no mater what this is where you will always belong.
Sit on your branch. When you leave take some leaves and bark with you so you know we're always here for you.
We love you.

Somewhere years ago
there was a fight that lead
to war then a ten second
attempt.
Somewhere months ago
there was a falling out
and secrets were deserted
then handed to others
Ears.
Someday back when I
Knew everything I learned
There would be change.
Sometimes my mouth gave
word and could not shut up
no matter how hard I tried.
Somewhere tonight,
I couldn't speak.
Didn't want you to
Know what really
Goes on in my
depressed life.
Never thought
Someday I'd be
Silent and did
Not want
To talk
About
Anything.

Quiet is all I need.
Desiring silence as the critics improvise
their own violins.
The philosophers tune their cello's.
The writers prepare the songs.
All the song says is the truth of where I stand in life.
Praying I'll be ok tomorrow.
How I stand in front of the cold audience
whom have the obligation of peaceful listening.
Many who choose to not open their ears to another sound
will only be alone playing their guitars.
I want the audience to be silent for me.
Learning as they whisper bewildered and stunned.
There are no strings attached.
How the sound of one's insecurity dysfunctions another's quality tune.
Know we are to hear but don't have to do a cover.
Instrumental choice,
one's vision and dream.
Hear me sing,
then tune your cello's, guitars, and violins.
We'll take a chance on our stances in life.
Hear each other and play together.
For in the slightest way,
our beliefs,
are different,
though the sound,
can blend.

I would never go back to our days of love and redo it all.
Such fun turned to such unfortunate episodes.
They came for us just wanted to tear us apart.
I would lie in bed with the sun beaming through the window, just Couldn't push through another day.
You would say you were going to marry me.
I couldn't bear to question that.
Then I remember who you introduced me to.
Your friends I loved so much wanted to have them as much as I wanted to have you.
Driving in a car at night barely following the speed limit.
I never wanted to go home.
Years later I am home and you and me are done.
I now don't know you anymore.
You've changed as well as me.
So do people, so does life.
The right thing doesn't last forever.
We most certainly didn't.
You never even showed me a ring.
It was ten months.
When it comes to love,
Know the
Speed limit.

I thought we could all be a choir of insecure teenagers pretending nothing is wrong when in our heads it is all wrong.
I sang the blues and danced in the hallways of the school, but my only applause was
pointing fingers and laughter.
I knew that if I ruled the world, I would have everyone sit in a circle and just
say it the way their young mind wants them to.
If I was queen of the drama I would say to scream the worst of the worst profanity,
get in the center of the tile floor as if it is your stage,
vent, spread your arms apart as your fingers leave inches of space,
and cry for all to see.
Never would I let anyone go back to the same person at the same time of day.
We would pick someone new and together we would learn through conversation that there is power when meeting a stranger. To all I was one.
Talking to yourself will no longer be a crime, and I would make it ok for
everyone to jump up and down, say something wrong, and shrug to any words that
are worth the outrageous reaction.
Never make fun of me for all that I do at any moment at any time.
I knew I would never rule the world at age thirteen as stress was lit like a match and flames of tears and a lying face would burn all over me.
The scar burns and ashes have melted away and I can smile again,
and when the phoenix flies by so high and visible,
every tic stops for a moment as I am detained by graceful vision.
I am alive today carrying but not devoting the way I see myself that has made me stronger, and not only a woman with bravery,
but a teacher with lessons of respect.
Now class,
you can’t control the rest of the students,
but be kind to yourself first,
never punish yourself for your flaws,
and see how compassion and love
brings you to believe
in your own
strength.
We can’t all have the same spirit inside,
but we can let it outside of ourselves to
show we belong together as a world.
Class dismissed,
now your homework tonight
is to read yourself and write a paper
about all the things you love about
who you are, not anybody else.
You won’t be graded,
this is all for
you.

Nobody has ever shown utter ambition to sit still and
learn from something I will either destroy my looking good
or I will warm another heart and tears will be part of the
scene.
Though its only once I get to be with you every week,
you are the best part I dare say.
Men like you fight the world to be at peace as they live
their dream.
If I could be yours I and if I were a magic woman
I would make the world a better place for your dream to come true,
and I would be your queen to support your every decision made
and for all to be there to see it.
I want to see it, as you are sincere in asking to read my poems
and listen to the harmony and lyrics of my songs.
I write and dream of us to be close
I am more than ok with being just friends as long as I
live my life and you play a great part.
I will cast you as the leading male.
The thought of you is what pushes me to try harder.
Tell me,
if you think of me,
while creating your magic on the screen
as you live your dream.
I will
be there
to see
it.
But now,
I imagine,
feel nothing but
butterflies when I see and
think of you,
and hope some form of magic
happens.

Remember that girl whom they would all fawn over,
Mistakes were nothing and prayers she received.
She had their back and knew every little answer to all problems so big.
She would bat her eyes and disallow tears.
She would keep her head up high and her shoulders rested.
They wondered why she walked so fast not a footprint to be left in the seeds and grass.
She had to get away.
Popularity was her biggest confusion.
Away she ran God forbid she would be alone.
She was.
She needed the time.
She was no god, nor did she wish to be idolized.
Everyone matters, she felt it in her heart.
As soon as the bad mood came and took its place, she ran, tripped, and cried on the concrete.
The crowd became paparazzi.
She didn't want to trend anymore.
Time was needed to deal but not heal what she couldn't.
They walked away.
That is all she
Ever
Wanted.

Look,
I wasn’t comfortable with who I was
either.
Listen,
I’m happy you found them but your becoming them
is shattering my heart.
Feel
the way I do one day because you will never be the one
to destroy a conversation because you said
something stupid.
I know you felt sorry for me but it was all insults
you had left to feed me.
I couldn’t believe the person you turned into.
You were at the start of the line driving for the first time
while I sat in the back after every tantrum.
Every tantrum was to get you to not only hear me,
but to like me the way I was.
Look,
you need to be ok with those of us who are not
putting money in the bank and who see counselors
in school.
Listen
to your heart and let it tell you to never put time nor effort into
jerks who don’t care about you.
When I saw you after a few years,
I was devastated as I felt your arrogance scrape my face
and turn it red and embarrassed.
I stayed behind after I was told with you
right there.
Since those days ended I became comfortable and you started
to like me.
I don’t want to trade places with you.
You live in a new country and I can be part of a gathering when I’m at home.
We changed and grew wise and sharp,
and I really do care
for you.

Go through hell once, try to let go and forget.
The others come in, and there's the upset.
I'll be the bigger person, that job is done.
When it comes to getting praised and credit,
there is none.
Never knowing our right place.
You don't even have to say it to my face.
We are smart enough to find out what is said about me and everyone else there is no doubt.
But as the days go on,
and more is discussed as we say it and talk,
we forget who and what the problem is really about.
I walk this place alone, no problem there.
But you putting this weight on my shoulders creates you into being unfair.
There is no blame.
I feel no shame.
Since I said what I needed and did what I had to do,
and I handled with such maturity, discipline, strength and even,
I did everything and was very sane.
I won the game.
However, even if you are still very ******* and horrified at what I did and if you don't agree, you have no reason to.
But I will be civil on you.
But for now on, let my decisions be up to me.
Where I go shall be seen in my eyes .
Perhaps my independence
will represent what you heard from the other side.
They were lies.
False criticisms, endless battles, force, and belief in no point of view but our own.
I may have frustration, anger, and obsessive talk,
but I have kindness to loan.
I have the right to lift off and release this pushing weight.
It's about the problem
not a persons annoying trait.
We all learned from this falling out,
even though I never received my apology.
I am over this and I didn't lose anything.
I can still breathe.
You learned so much from me.
Now, I understand everything, but I am not sorry.
I have words put in my mouth.
I have depression in my body and my head.
It's time for you to understand
the words that I said.
Now thank you for noticing
how I struggled with this weight on my shoulders.
Very heavy indeed.
I felt this weight that you all put on me went in and through my muscles and it effected me mentally.
It's now your turn to feel it.
And take in and accept your doing in this falling out that occurred.
You cannot let it push you down,
and you cannot let it make you trip.
So now,
you feel the pain I dealt with.
And even though I forgive without any sorrow,
I see now,
that you get it. I am right indeed, and you know
why I did it.

On her walk,
she treaded the path,
brainstorming the incident
and facing the aftermath.
Along came a man,
walking on his own,
little did she have in mind,
this is someone she had known.

“Why the long face?
why the tears,
why the chin so low?
May you open your ears?”

She replied,
“I wish I cold tell you,
but I really don’t know.
Who I am or where I belong.
I thought I loved myself
but perhaps I am wrong.”

The man looked at her
astonished by her
honesty,
he could see that she needed to be
told she was fine and deserved to be
happy.

“Oh the places you’ll go,
That is a book I wrote I’m sure
You must know?”

“Yes,
I read it as a child,
When it was okay to be
Fun, crazy, and wild.
Wait a second,
Dr. Seuss,
is it you?!
I read your books growing up,
and the meanings were oh so
true!”


“I love your feedback,
very genuine, you raise the bar.
Now what’s wrong with who, or how you are?
Do they say you take it too far?”

“I lose friends every year.
I come off as too strong,
I lose control when I go out
and they say I no longer belong.
I then get excluded and I spend weekend nights alone,
I don’t want it to be this way,
I want to show everyone I have grown.
I’m the reason drama happens but I only want to
Have fun.
I told them I love myself,
And they told me to
go away,
Run.”

“Who is they?
Might I ask,
You’re like the
“Cat in the hat.”
But the mess gets cleaned up
in the end,
You just have to say,
“Yes I did that.””
Knowing when to draw the line
Is just as important
As knowing how to have
A real good
Time.”


“That’s the thing,
I don’t know when.
I think I’m being too loud
But when I’m quiet
I feel drowned.
I feel like I have only myself,
I’m like the Grinch,
I’m alone on a mountain so angry
I have no help.
No friends,
nobody loves me,
wants me,
invites me,
they tell me they’ve had enough,
my frustration is as high as the sky.
I hate having no one
I don’t know how much more
I can try..”

“My goodness,
you’re so upset,
I’m sorry this is how you feel.
Now this may sound ironic what I am to tell you,
but you are the one who makes it
real.
You are loved
You just have to accept,
You have some work to do
But you must let go of
Regret.”

“Mr. Seuss,
I live alone and I never sweep my floor.
I give my friends space,
But they always ask for more.”

“But you’re in control,
You just need to note,
Your confidence is there,
Now anchor your boat.
Take the anchor out of the ground
When you’re ready to go somewhere new.
Be a captain,
I see a leader in you.
Do you remember Horton?
The elephant that heard a ‘Who.’
If you spend time solo,
Someone like a ‘who,’
Will call for you.
They’ll need you.
They’ll want you,
They’ll be there for you
Too.
As Horton Said himself,
“A person’s a person no matter how small.”
The little ‘who’s’ told Horton he did nothing
but save them all!
Sometimes we people hear what we don’t want,
But think of it as honesty and then you let it go and you show them what you got,
Like,
“You must not hop on pop.”
Or,
Your heart may grow and you’ll be surrounded for a Christmas Dinner.
You are not a loser,
You are a winner.”

“Thank you, Dr. Seuss,
I’m no longer on the loose.
I may have had illogical moments,
But I have so many things to choose.
I may have had a loss,
but I am for now on proud to be alive,
there will sometimes be a cost,
but this is my life,
I am the boss!
I’m continuing my walk now,
I really needed this encounter with you,
Thank you for your words of wisdom,
And I will wait to hear from my “who.””

“Now I wish you the best of luck,
My sweet dear.
I love that you live a life of lessons,
And have nothing to fear.
Your rules are your own,
You know what you are after,
“Those who mind,
Don’t matter,
Those who don’t mind,
Matter.”
Congratulations!
Today is your day.
You’re off to great places,
you’re off and away.”

“And I am the person
who will decide where I
go.
Goodbye Dr. Seuss,
you’re a true friend,
I just have to move on and go forward
this story will never end!
You are a good man
and a blessing of a
‘Who.’
Right now,
this moment,
I will start happening
too.
Thank You.”

You know,
it’s just a game.
If I can’t learn
to hear screaming
over a loss and not
cover my ears,
I can’t play with you.

If you don’t want to
let me in without
clenching your fists
and gritting your teeth,
why ask me anyway?

If we can’t learn to
accept all our differences,
we can’t be in the same
game.
I lose, someone else wins,
I feel no sorrow,
you feel no sympathy.

Who is the winner anyway?
Since I have songs to play
and dreams to fulfill,
I would say the winner
is me.
Your loss, is a chance,
to have a friend who
cares deeply and shows
appreciation,
like me.

I couldn't believe how wrong I was.
I knew that they would turn their heads away and choose what they listen.
I was certain I'd be in tears by the time I arrived.
I had the idea that they decided through distance that I ruin everything.

I couldn't believe how wrong I was.
I was smiled at and praised when I was seen.
I was listened to and even created oppurtunities for laughing and clapping.
I had no idea they missed me so much.

Through distance, we either change our minds or learn to love no matter the cost of peace or share.
Through distance, we think.
I was overthinking the whole time I was gone.
All doubt gone and forgotten.
We have no punches to roll with but no reason to punch in the first place.
We're all at peace.

Prettiest lights and the
realest folks
all gather on the streets of
Times Square.
All that is expected is to enjoy the
signs,
the music playing,
stores and their windows with
dresses and mannequins,
and the lights flashing everywhere
creating the brightest
scene.
All that is expected is to
let yourself free.
Adapt to the lights that
flash
observe the signs of
artists on their way
put a penny in the guitarists
case
take in the audio of
real people
everywhere.
We would be lost in life
without the fitting in of
a little
shenanigans.
I just want
to be there
again.

You just can't get over that I
exist. Can you?
Do you ever get enough people
to fawn over you and your
guitar?
Can you ever get another set of
eyes to watch over your great and
bashful performance?
You look thinner than me.
I'm nothing but a fat hourglass
ticking until my mood
changes.
Do you not see how they yawn
as you talk about nothing but
yourself?
This is how you have confused love
for admiration.
When they say No to hearing your new
cover,
It's not their
jealousy at its peak.
It is you Tiresome
personality just being there.

Putting feelings together of lust and desire are
the privilege and curse of having someone on your mind
and questioning yourself however you do and however insecure you feel.
Putting together the words and steps of how to approach and
spell out that you like them are the scariest and most skeptical
letters you will ever choose in your life.
Once you said them, they are gone from inside, and then taken care
of outside like the mother bears with their cubs and the rabbits with
their babies,
we knew there was something there, forgetting  the questions and thoughts.

Putting together a relationship makes you nothing but ambitious
and your eyes glitter, you look nowhere but up thanking the world
you are where you are, it is what it is, and you are who you are.
Putting together the days you will come together again are when you
lay in bed alone, and pray you will lay together soon again.
Putting together a life is crucial and emotional,
times change, so does everyone, and nothing lasts forever.
I love you, and I know you do too.

Being young not wanting to get old for the first time in my life,
I could never put anything together, pull myself together, or
mature if you and I were not together.
We will see where we go, this journey, this time, this phase,
this relationship,
I love being together with you, feeling your touch and your brown
eyes lock onto me, and your long black hair flowing in the wind,
you make me feel like a beauty queen whenever I feel like a disaster.
I feel you too and I see in your smile you feel like the king of the world
as I want you to.
Complications are conquerable, age is a number, time goes by, and how I
feel your warmth just by thinking how we can put things in place and grow
together,
we will have to see what happens,
I like this vision.

I wonder why you're no longer nice to me,
But first I wonder why you feel inferior enough
to show how phasesd you are by your own troubles and sorrow.
And it's me you pick
to reply with vulgarity and stubborn attitude?
All I can say,
It's rather nice to be me, and I'll bet it
*****
to be
you ;).

While the world was changing
our different beliefs were
furiously ascending.
They used to be intriguing as I’d be shooting
a rifle and you would be marching with me
in a fight for women’s rights.
Now you’re being sexist and I’m for
control.
Never thought the reality of beliefs in
legal eyes would take us on a toll.
I stood and panicked as you held my hands
and offered to take me.
You looked to the side of the room near the door
when I talked about my feminist spirit and what
it means to me.
We two great people so passionate and
holding our beliefs in a clutch
got to be overbearing and  then anxiety said it
was too much.
I tried too hard you tried  even harder.
Breaks my heart that different views of
federal and state cases did not let this relationship
go farther.
You’re gone and bullets are raining in your life.
I see no more of your face and I never again feel
your touch.
I guess what I want in this world is happening through
LGBT and Gun Control,
perhaps I’m too good AND
too much.

He is on my mind.
Still and I'm practically ******.
I think of him and just can't
bear the thought of falling in love.
Though I cannot bear the thought of
a falling out, he will be on my mind
until I see him in front of me
eye to eye.
Maybe reality will take me away from
imagination.
Because naturally,
it isn't happening at all,
and it never will.

Nothing I do will allow me to restrain
my hands from flapping and my words
insane.
No one can ever say I don’t belong or
I did something wrong.
This is neurological and nothing I
took of the shelf.
Though this label I have is why I’m
usually by myself.
I blink many times but I can still see
the beautiful people.
You’ll see my restless legs but one
day I’ll be in the position that is fetal.
My phrases may sound ignorant and
bothersome
but I somewhere have a voice that
spreads truth and wisdom.
Though I may be alone
or staying at home
I party in my room
and feeling no doom.
Tourette’s is no sin,
when the ticks start to begin,
they perform and I let it go
it is still there but it doesn’t have
to be a show.
Its about the inside forget the
gesturing hands.
We people are styled and different
but never are we brands.
We here for each other
reasons to be told.
I may have ticks but many
great stories to unfold.
We learn to respect and listen
to our family and friends.
The ones I have I know are
there, they never expect
the ticks to end.
It’s nothing I pretend.

The dreams I have where enemies reside
are killed by the morning light and savored
in my frontal lobe.
I think how they could have hurt me the way
they did in the dream.
She put her arms all over me and she grasped
my neck I could not breathe at all.
He grabbed my hand and would not permit me
to be with my friends though I could sense the
relationship was over.
Waking up after seeing somebody I once was
abused by is hard to do,
but its harder for them to see I am awake and
ready
to let it all go
and live for real,
this time.